Just for you, Elvis...
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Two things will always thrill me
Pretty women and straight whiskey

Laser lights and disco balls
Smoke machines and neon walls
Sub-bass rattling in my brain
I'm not impressed at all

Purple haired something behind the bar slurs,
"Don't you know where you are, Sir?"

May be safer to stay home but
I can't boot-scoot all alone
Two things will always thrill me
Pretty women and straight whiskey

I take a stroll on down the street
I hear a fiddle and a country beat
Sign on the door said come on in
If you got boots on your feet

Honey at the bar said don't be shy
The "Chicken Pickers" were playin' live
All the boys were wearing jeans
All the cowgirls were dancin' in line

My new friend said "If you're still doubtin'...
There ain't any cowboys on Broke Back Mountain"

I winked and said "Well, when in Rome"
She poured me a shot and said welcome home
Two things will always thrill me
Pretty women and straight whiskey