Originally Posted by Mike Dunbar
Originally Posted by rblight
I remember the tears in her eyes
When she said she'd always wait there for me
I guess it came as quite a surprise
When I told her that I had to be free
I took my freedom and traveled the world
I've seen everything any one man can see
I broke all the shells but did not find that pearl
But in my heart I always knew where it would be
And I had only just to look right next to me

My sweet Kentucky Rose
I'm comin' home; I'm comin' home
My sweet Kentucky Rose
I'm comin' home; I'm comin' home
Girl, I'm coming home

Sometimes we think that our place in this world
Is a place where we would rather not be
We tell ourselves as our lives start to change
That we need more than we have to be free
We take for granted the things we love most
And those ones we hold most dear in our hearts
We never notice until they are gone
And their memories start to tear us apart
If we had only known that truth from the start

My sweet Kentucky Rose
I'm comin' home; I'm comin' home
My sweet Kentucky Rose
I'm comin' home; I'm comin' home

I took my freedom and traveled the world
I've seen everything any one man can see
I broke all the shells but did not find that pearl
But deep inside I've always known where it would be
And it was always sitting right there next to me

My sweet Kentucky Rose
I'm comin' home; I'm comin' home
My sweet Kentucky Rose
I'm comin' home; I'm comin' home
My sweet Kentucky Rose
I'm comin' home; I'm comin' home
My sweet Kentucky Rose
I'm comin' home; I'm comin' home
My sweet Kentucky Rose
You know I'm comin'
Yes I'm comin' home to be right next to you
My sweet Kentucky Rose
You know it won't be long
It won't be long till I'm back home with you
My sweet Kentucky Rose
My sweet, sweet, sweet Kentucky Rose



rblight,

First verse rhymes: me free see be me. Second verse rhymes: be free Bridge rhymes: see be me. Bridge copies first verse. Only concrete image: a tear. Only metaphor: a pearl, metaphor repeated once, but nothing else refers to it. No personal references (e.g. I remember the tears in ROSE'S eyes). Second verse, just thoughts and observations about life, no concrete, active story to which they relate, they're mostly common observations and not personal. No action in the story. For example: Imagine if the script to Saving Private Ryan was "We went to France, marched across the land, got in some fights, and saved Private Ryan." Show them how you did it and why you did it with images and actions rather than descriptions.

Hope this helps.

Mike


Hi Mike,

I get what you are saying and appreciate the feedback. Ironic that you should mention Saving Private Ryan. That is one of my favorite movies of all time, along with the original Jaws (I have been feeling a bit blue lately over the death of Roy Scheider). Here is a song of mine that was inspired by SPR about June 6, 1944. The lyrics are story-telling style, with each verse progressing, the way i should have written Sweet Kentucky Rose. NOTE - this song is not a country song -- it is hard rock.

http://www.doctorthor.com/liberty.mp3


Liberty

Sea waves crashing, rockets flashing
Higgins boat approaching land
Soldiers falling, Captains calling
Dragging guts across the sand
Bombs exploding, crafts unloading
Shrapnel chopping through my hands
Courage showing, slowly growing
Moving forward, my last stand

Fire left, Fire right
Fight for my life
Shine on this light
Liberty, one up on Tyranny, tonight
Ah, we gonna beat this down tonight

Smoke clouds rising, Nazis hiding
Blasting bullets from the bluffs
Coast concealing, seawalls shielding
Hoping they will shelter us
Comrades dying, brave men crying
Can't move on, not bold enough
Won't stop praying, no delaying
Rise up now, be strong enough

Fire left, Fire right
Fight for my life
Shine on this light
Liberty, one up on Tyranny, tonight
As these stained shores show the price

I will always love you
I'll lay down my life for you
I'll defend your shores from all who come to steal them from you
How I long to see you
How I long to be with you
And if I should not return, remember all these things I do
I do for you

New fronts forming, allies storming
Pushing forward, move ahead
Paris waiting, liberating
Raising flags as freedom spreads
SS crumbling, Hitler running
Devils dancing in their heads
Rain keeps falling, death keeps calling
Treat the wounded, mark the dead

Fire left, Fire right
Fight for my life
Shine on this light
Liberty, one up on Tyranny
Yes, sweet Liberty, one up on Tyranny
Ah, sweet Liberty, one up on Tyranny, tonight


Fisherman hook fish; songwriters fish for hooks

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