Thanks so much, Judy, for checking in on this one for me. This is the first time I have ever tried to write a specific song for someone else...and it was much more difficult than just writing whatever I wanted. If you see this note, perhaps you might clarify if you think it is better with or without the GRAND with that canyon line. I didn't really want it to be that specific, and it didn't seem to need the extra syllable there for the meter so I left it off.

I have been listening more and more to the kinds of rhyme that is being used these days in country songs that are making it to radio...and of course, checking liner notes. I find that they are moving away from the perfect rhymes which often sound forced. For example, in Alan Jackson's current song..he uses the words heaven/livin/sittin as rhymes. In another of his songs he rhymes edgy with spaghetti..and Alan is about as traditional as they get these days. I was using cup/pot as the internal rhyme in that 7th line. I like what you said about "the whole lot" but I think it has a bit of the Aussie sound to it that may not work so well here. In the line talking about the rose "blooming", since I already said it was a fake one, I am hoping folks will understand that I simply meant it was an open flower. That was sorta meant to be tongue in cheek there...and I like the way it flows a bit better than 'sat' in the vase.

I am still cogitating on the envy line and the beautiful/delightful. Those may still change also.

As for the length, I am hoping the music may help with that, and given that this is her song, I suspect she will perform it regardless of length...and she won't need to worry about breaking for commercials. [Linked Image]

You always make me think through why I write what I do..and I sure appreciate that!!! Thanks SO much for the ideas and insights!

Bobbie


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