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Thanks for taking the time to comment, Japov.

A long time indeed! Had to smile at your mention of the structure. I know it’s a weird one. For some strange reason I can only write my lyrics vertically, with breaks at the places that sound – to me – natural. Even though I know vocalists might prefer longer, horizontal lines. One long-time collaborator in Scotland told me he always turns my vertical lines into horizontal ones for himself before he starts composing and singing.

I agree with you about the bridge, and will adjust it accordingly.
About the hook: To me, the suggested change sounds too close to an image of actual physical abuse. I felt the idea of a heart being beaten up was a catchy angle.

Though I hope others will chime in on this.
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Kay-lynn, I understand the reluctance. But a lyric without music can be assessed on the basis of a few things: for instance, are the rhyme scheme and the metering consistent; are concrete details – furniture – provided to add texture and to appeal to the senses; is it too wordy/too sparse; is the narrative relatable; do the words that were chosen reflect the genre or the intended vibe; are the characters 3-dimensional and likeable (or at least arouse some kind of emotion); have any of the six ‘friends’ (who/what/when/where/why/how) been incorporated; are clichés or mixed metaphors present; are there too many filler words, and so on.

These are probably the kinds of things you consider when you’re creating your own songs. I know you to be a good writer.

If readers feel a lyric looks silly on paper, it’s really helpful for the writer to know why, even if the reason is a minor one. Some things can easily be adjusted that aren’t dependent on the music.

Because ‘Bruised’ is intended for a collaborator, I didn’t want to Sunofy it first. Mainly because I know Suno would likely do a great job, and I’d fall in love with it. If that happened, it might bias me against anything the collaborator came up with.

Also, I want to make sure the lyric is in reasonable shape before I hand it over. Then he and I can talk about it, and whether it works for him. If it doesn’t … thank goodness there’s Suno.