Originally Posted by Michael Zaneski
Great music and lyric. Has both Bee Gees overtones and that great rather Latin-ish syncopation in the chorus.

I agree with what Rob (Couch) said concerning "peace." Especially since it's set up with "missing" and "puzzle" we're thinking it's missing "piece" and "peace" only becomes effective by reading.

But I vacillate, for it seems like a lot of intention went into the chorus, so I'm not sure changing it, per se, helps the song, since you are intentionally wanting the listener to hear it as "piece" --at least in the chorus.

You do, though, convey the idea of a lack of inner peace in the verses, so I think you were trying to get the double meaning effect by introducing ideas about inner "peace" or lack thereof, in the verses.

But I am not sure the "peace" idea the verses convey carries over into the chorus, since the setup there is so strongly writ to get a "piece" read on the word.

Perhaps you could consider "brute forcing" the idea "peace" in some way, or a lack thereof, inner turmoil, conflict, etc, in a bridge, that could solidify the double meaning in the listener's mind.

It seems like a waste of a great double meaning, to have a listener only get it from the song's title or reading the lyric, but your lyric is perfectly sound, either way. Kind of experimental, to me, to have an eye rhyme/visual rhyme be a hook in a song.




Mike, thanks for the listen and comment...very insightful into what I was thinking...firstly, Jesus is both the missing piece and peace...so which to use was the dilemma...the verses evolved from a reflection on my life...they both applied to me and yet made significantly different statements, almost in opposition to each other...in V1 I’m saying everything is great yet there is something missing and just like a jigsaw puzzle is not complete when 1 piece is missing so was my life not complete without Jesus in it but without knowing that was the issue...when I did accept Him, He was the inner peace I was missing....In V2 I’m talking of the darkness/depression I suffered...having everything I ever wanted didn’t fix it...in that verse I looked for the inner peace to take away the pain and when that occurred, my life was more complete with the missing piece...Jesus


You may also have noticed the slight change in the choruses to reflect emptiness/loneliness which I suffered from at the same time...

With regard to CG comment, I 100% get where he is coming from to sort out the piece/peace conundrum and it should not be a difficult fix...I just have to wrap my head around it...

Yes the verses were written to seek out peace not piece and yet in the chorus I do speak of puzzle but it’s the puzzle of “life” (perhaps my own invention of the term...lol) and so maybe I was being “too cute by half”...but then life can have many puzzles that aren’t solved until you attain peace? Maybe I go with

In the chaos of your life
He might be the missing peace



In the end do I really care if someone thinks peace and someone else piece...if it’s a deal breaker, I’ll sure care then...lolol

I hope this makes sense

Steve

Last edited by VNORTH2; 10/13/23 01:17 PM.
Creators of music have a responsibility to their craft. When they have finished using all the notes and words, they must pass them down to the next generation with a simple request. “Use these to create new music.”...Steven McDonald