JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback MP3 Feedback Forum Ruby Slippers

Kay-Lynn,

First I loved the idea of writing a song about the Ruby Slippers. I write some tunes along this vein and have often wanted to write a song about one of the little people actors in the movie who died about 10 years ago. There was a headline in the newspaper that read "The Last Munchkin" and I thought that might make an interesting song. But I did not write it, because I had no idea where to take that story.

I think the song needs something lyrically. As Eddie pointed-out, you could use the bridge to address this. As it stands, it seems like a transition song that leads to a different scene in a musical. It does not feel complete to me. I really like the melody but it also lends itself to the idea that this song is a "part" of a bigger work. This might be what you were doing anyway, which is great if so. However, if you are going to play/pitch/perform this, I would really think about what your core meaning is and then rearrange/rewrite your lyric to convey this. I get that the singer is disappointed and is taking off the slippers because they seem to be keeping her away from home. But the slippers were actually how Dorothy got home. Even the witch could not take them off of her. The shoes would shock the witch when she tried. That's why the witch tried to kill Dorothy. The slippers were really symbolic of the fact that "home" was in Dorothy's heart all along and all she had to do was click her heels together and make a wish.

To my way of thinking, the idea of taking the slippers "off" to get home has to be supported just a tad better than what you have now. This is just my opinion, of course. But I think taking a look at this could move this from a "good" start to a "great" song.


Just my thoughts after a couple of listens. Please disregard if nothing I have said resonates.