Kim,

I don't comment often on lyrics (and I know you have a recording, but I don't want to hear it just yet). I think the lyrics really have potential with a monster hook that is really commercial and the right vibe to the lyric.. with one exception...

The songs reads like a teenage girl singing it... the boyfriend/girlfriend significance doesn't matter and is interchangeable (especially in the current market... imagine one of the current pop star divas doing it exactly like it is written, or a young upstart). But, the bridge is a total bummer because the rest of the song reads so young and hip, but the bridge reads like it was written by an older adult and kills the vibe and angst of the rest of the lyric.

I'd recapture that vibe and redo the bridge completely and imagine Taylor Swift singing it or someone else of her age group and what they might say... they wouldn't use those words. It feels like a girl should be singing verses a boy as it rings a bit more true in a girls voice/viewpoint/angst.

If you wrote it from a boys point of view, you'd have to harden up the freakin' to fuc*in'

Just my thoughts, nice job.

Brian

Brian Austin Whitney
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