Quote
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by redwriter1:
the line works on paper it's just hard for me to imagine starting a line with "there" when all the other lines seem to be statements in themselves.</font>


Okay, Kay-lynn, try this original first word to begin that line. "Just"

"just to lift you out of your sorrow"

Since you actually clicked the "make mp3 available button" this time, I downloaded the working demo. In my opinion, your tempo is too quick for the message unless, of course, this is something you hope to pitch to Joni Mitchell for her next "flight of the bumble bee-tempo" folk album.

Still, knowing what you are doing melodically, here is a bridge that will work both musically and set up the final chorus:

(Bridge)
Never was shy, just needed convincing
something to untangle what's pulling me down
someone to say, baby where you been hidin'
to get your heart spinning around

P.E. Knudsen


[This message has been edited by Knute (edited 10-11-2003).]

P.E. Knudsen