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Joined: May 2017
Posts: 2,160 Likes: 26
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I seem to have met a lot of folks lately whose belief in bizarre conspiracy theories must be making Vladimir Putin feel very pleased with himself. It seems the more flags and eagles and references to freedom and patriotism you see on a "news" website, the more likely it is to be the creation of a fat guy called Sergei chuckling to himself about dumb Americans at his desk in St. Petersburg (not the one in Florida). This song is not a political statement, just an attempt to laugh in the face of something scary. As always, I will be grateful for all feedback and suggestions. https://soundcloud.com/themysteriousbeings/it-aint-a-conspiracy-theory-if-its-trueThe lyric is below, but it's definitely better just to listen to words and music together. I may not be much of a singer, but I am the champion of clear enunciation LOL. IT AIN’T A CONSPIRACY THEORY IF IT’S TRUE(Words & Music by Gavin Sinclair) It ain’t a conspiracy theory If it’s true Don’t let that guy from the FBI Overhear me talking to you He wants us thinking he’s just sitting there drinking But that’s not why he’s here There’s a microphone hidden right there in the foam Of his Pabst Blue Ribbon beer CHORUS It ain’t a conspiracy theory if it’s true Hey, where are you going? Come back here, I ain’t done talking to you! I saw it on a site with “Freedom” in its name It had an eagle and Old Glory flying You must be a commie to hate our flag And accuse an eagle of lying Five million illegal aliens Came down with Elvis in a UFO Voted for Hillary Clinton And then said time to go There’s a plot to make our president look less like a genius By the liberal elite Painted him orange, let him talk And showed him how to tweet CHORUS You know, Hillary skipped school the day That somebody shot JFK Go on, try explaining that away If you’re so smart Socialist Muslims are coming for us In a big old bus driven by George Soros Now, I’m being silenced by the lamestream chorus That’s just about to start CHORUS A buddy of mine saw Bigfoot Out there in the parking lot Then a helicopter from the Yoo Nited Nations Landed and bang, he got shot (Bigfoot, not my buddy) The moon landing never happened The earth is flat As for 9-11, I know for a fact... Hey, come back here Where are you going? I ain’t done talking to you....
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Joined: Jul 2005
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Hilarious You struck just the right tone - over the top but just slightly more than some of the theories people throw out there. Nice one, Gavin. Scott
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Hilarious You struck just the right tone - over the top but just slightly more than some of the theories people throw out there. Nice one, Gavin. Scott Thanks Scott. I was talking to the receptionist at the car repair shop yesterday, and it turned out she believed in half of these, including all the nonsense about poor old George Soros, who gets blamed for everything. She was astonished to learn that they weren't true. I didn't talk to her about Bigfoot, but when I had to go to the tire shop to get new tires on my truck, the TV there was tuned to a "documentary" show about hunting for him (and werewolves). It would be comforting to think that the problem was confined to the automotive trade, but I doubt it.
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Joined: Feb 2013
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Ha ha. Great lyric. Agree - just the right comedic tone to hopefully not get the conspiracy theorists perturbed, though I hear this tune is on infowars radar! Enjoyed it fully.
Dave
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Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,324 Likes: 24
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Fun tune, great tongue in cheek lyric.
Put it up in youtube prolly get alot of hits
Last edited by Fdemetrio; 09/19/19 11:08 AM.
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Joined: Jun 2019
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Nope, not funny... Not funny at all!! Those alien probes are no joke!!! And Bigfoot keeps knocking over my damn trashcan!!!
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Joined: May 2017
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Fun tune, great tongue in cheek lyric.
Put it up in youtube prolly get alot of hits
Thanks Fdemetrio. It is just supposed to be fun, but If I put this up on YouTube, I might get the wrong kind of hits LOL. I'm not hard to find.
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Joined: Nov 2011
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Gavin,
Really entertaining, and this is the tone that we need more of no matter which side of the fence folks reside. The ending trumpet (or synth) was a perfect music accompaniment to take the song out. This vibe reminds me a little of the early 60's radio comedy spots.
Great write all around!
steady-eddie
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Joined: May 2017
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Thanks Eddie. Glad you enjoyed it. The trumpet was my favorite part to do.
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Joined: Jun 2011
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A great story Gavin, you are the Sage ofJPF, without the onions. Well crafted and performed. Regarxs John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Aug 2018
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Fun song and, great writing and performing, all around. Regards Mimmo
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Joined: Jul 2006
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Hi Gavin,
I like this a lot. It's a fun piece. I think if it was trimmed a little it might be stronger, cuz at almost 4 minutes, the one idea was wearing a little thin by the end, for me. But there's so many great lines in this, though, I wouldn't know what to cut..except one thing at the end, for sure.
That being..mentioning 9/11 broke the mood, for me, at the end. It took 25 years for Mel Brooks to take a chance "Springtime For Hitler" had enough time and distance from the crime to write that and have folks laugh at it, and then within the narrative construct that it was supposed to help the play tank.
Mike
Last edited by Michael Zaneski; 09/20/19 07:36 PM.
Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice Fortune depends on the tone of your voice
-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon) from the song "Songs of Love" from the album "Casanova" (1996)
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Joined: May 2017
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Thanks Mike. Good point about 9/11. On the one hand, it is the holy grail of conspiracy theorists, which makes it seem like it belongs in there. On the other hand, there is nothing funny about 9/11. It would be easy to remove, as it's not actually part of a joke. I'll give it some thought. The length felt about right to me, but it's hard to tell when you're the one who wrote it Just taking out the 9-11 line and not replacing it would have it coming in a about 3 minutes 40 seconds, of which about 8 are the fade out. As always, I appreciate your insightful suggestions, Mike.
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Joined: Aug 2010
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Tickle them to death with the idiocy of their hairbrained fears. perhaps a good laugh at how silly it all sounds in reality might just wake up a few. Lovely work
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Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,400 Likes: 2
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Gavin,
What a great concept for a song . . . and it has all the charm and satire it needs to resonate. The vocal and production compliment each other well. Lyrically, I'm wondering if the song would have longer legs if it stayed focused on more universally recognized theories, like UFOs, the moon landing, the earth being flat, Paul McCartney being dead, Morrison being alive, the JFK thing, etc.--which never seem to fade--rather than some of the more contemporary references (e.g., the Hillary/Trump) which may date the song in time. Just a thought . . .
But I really enjoyed the listen, and always love to hear your tunes . . . they alway have such life to them.
Kindest regards,
Deej
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Joined: Aug 2007
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LOL
Just cuz you say that I'm paranoid does not mean that everyone is not out to get me.
Enjoyed it Gavin.
Marty
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Thanks, Matt, DJ and Marty.
DJ, I think you are right about the shelf-life of a song that makes reference to current events. I might have to live with that though because Mr. Trump is just so much funnier than any of those more timeless theories, and his conspiracy theories are more in tune with what the character in the song is most likely to fixate on. I never thought I'd hear myself say this, but I think we need Trump LOL.
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Joined: Sep 2007
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Hahahaha,
Well I lean toward Conspiracy theory for much of what we think we know....This would be cool with a sassy girl singing at parts as well & asking the questions....With bubble gum popping in her outh as she speaks
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