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10 members (bennash, Raymond Byabazaire, Gary E. Andrews, texritter, Fdemetrio, Sunset Poet, PopTodd, 3 invisible),
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Joseph
by Gary E. Andrews - 10/05/25 11:50 AM
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ROCKWAVE
by Ken Randall - 10/05/25 03:35 AM
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You Lie
by bennash - 10/03/25 06:21 PM
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,898 Likes: 1
Top 100 Poster
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OP
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,898 Likes: 1 |
Hi everyone! It's been a long time since I've been here at all, let alone posted anything. But I'm in the middle of writing this one and thought this would be the very best place to get feedback on it. It's right up the alley of a lot of folks here. https://soundcloud.com/poptodd/i-do...ium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharingThe chorus is DONE, as far as I'm concerned, and I am pretty well set with the chord changes for the verse, but I have yet to write any real lyrics for the verses, as you can hear. Hope everyone is well and I'm looking forward to swinging by every now and then.
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Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 7,637 Likes: 66
Top 30 Poster
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Top 30 Poster
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 7,637 Likes: 66 |
Hey man, good to see you around, always was a fan of your raw songs.
The " I don't drink because I think it will make pain go away
I drink I think it makes the pain ok
That's brilliant. Rest of it stinks... haha.
Sounds kind of like Stones dead flowers . Probably a country song in there
Keep working it
Last edited by Fdemetrio; 08/15/25 09:06 AM.
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,898 Likes: 1
Top 100 Poster
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OP
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,898 Likes: 1 |
Thanks for checking it out! And thanks for the feedback.
The Stones thing was by design. The direction I gave to the piano player was to "channel his inner Nicky Hopkins." Glad you picked up on that.
And yeah, the verses are not done. No lyrics, so the melody (as it is) is very fluid and directionless. But I do like the chord changes there.
I am definitely continuing to work it until I get it right. Because of that chorus, I think it could be a really good one.
Thanks again!
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,397 Likes: 40
Top 200 Poster
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Top 200 Poster
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,397 Likes: 40 |
Nice start to this one, sir!! I look forward to following its progression to completion.
Keep us updated!
Peace,
Dave
"Where there's a Gill, there's a way"
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,898 Likes: 1
Top 100 Poster
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OP
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,898 Likes: 1 |
Did a complete rewrite of the lyrics. Here is a new phone recording that I am bringing to the band: https://soundcloud.com/poptodd/i-dont-drink-1052025LYRICS: I don’t drink because I think It’ll make the pain go away I drink, I think Because it makes the pain okay 1. Falling on the floor and falling on my ass Not sure I’ll get up this time Being upright never lasts Losing all my motivation and losing all my friends Finding almost nothing Except the losing never ends So, I don’t drink... 2. I don’t have a job and I don’t have cash to spend All I’ve got is what I don’t want And what I want is for it all to end But I just keep on going, and I just slide on by Sliding on my face all day It hurts, but I don’t cry Because I don't drink… (Bridge) I’m not okay 3. Falling on the floor again and falling on my face Why get up, I’ll just fall down God, I hate this place So I don't drink…
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Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 2,734 Likes: 107
Top 100 Poster
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Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 2,734 Likes: 107 |
Good little work tape for the band , Good job man. What's that 3 chord you're using ? Sounds a bit odd
Last edited by bennash; Yesterday at 10:25 PM.
Retired from all music endeavors . at least 98 %
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