Hi!

I can really relate to this. My daughter and husband both have bipolar disorder. My daughter also has borderline personality traits. It's extremely frustrating but when you love someone and feel so helpless watching them suffer. I wrote this awhile back to work through some of my feelings. Feel free to write me if you ever need to talk to someone who understands.

Control

I can't turn back the hands of time
or change what has been done
I can't exchange the hands life dealt
or stop what has begun

You fight what I don't understand
I can't get past your walls
Each time I think there's progress made
it seems that we both fall

We find fear mixed in with laughter
and sorrow there with joy
Life certainly is not a game
and you are not a toy

At times I don't know what to say
I'm scared to show my heart
I'm sometimes awkward and confused
as how to play my part

While you battle from within
out here I fight for you
I try to live for sunny days
when hope comes shining through

I'm not sure if you realize 
how much I really care
I die inside to see your pain
yet love is always there

But nothing that I say or do
can give me the control
of what was never in my hands
but battles with my soul

.


Jennifer (Jinx) Shaner