Nick,
I can't really be much a poetic critic - I don't even know the rules. The source of the altered state interests me. Some people naturally live in an altered state. Or at least their minds are there and alot of creative things come from them. People originally touted LSD as a mind expanding drug so that whole area is another source of altered state though ignoble.

by the way you have wonderfully described the beauty of the altered state in contrast to the usual one.

John


Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword never had an editor.