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Lot Long
by Gary E. Andrews - 11/10/26 11:20 AM
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 8,490
Top 20 Poster
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OP
Top 20 Poster
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 8,490 |
I made some additional changes to this, based on your feedback. The third rewrite is posted above. I tried to build up a little more suspense, so that the surprise doesn't hit without warning, as many of you pointed out! Any thoughts? Thanks! -- Lisa
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