JPF Home Page Forums General Messages General Message Forum Prayers again for Helen and Al

Hello all,
If I'm not mistaken, then today is the day for Helen David's important first of two needed surgeries. So, another prayer thread is in order. I hope Al will keep us informed.

God bless you Al and Helen! Our prayers are with you!

Heidi

Thanks for postin' this Heidi!

Helen & Al, we'll be thinkin' of ya!!

Uncle Chuck

Thank you, Heidi:

My prayers are with you Helen and Al.

Dave

I'm there....good luck u 2

Hi Folks,

Helen is in surgery right now. I have to do SOMETHING her in the waiting room, so I thought I would let you know what's going on at the moment. The total surgery will be about 2 hours. If all goes well, she might even get to go home this evening...in the snow and rush hour traffic!

We did learn one thing...Helen will need a subsequent, reconstructive surgery in about a month or so. She will be in the hospital for 4 - 6 weeks after that one. That was a bit of a shock!

Will let you know more when I know more. Thanks to everyone for their warm wishes and/or prayers. We appreciate all of it! And thank you, Heidi!

Al (and Helen)

Prayers coming your way....

Kevin

Alan,

God bless Helen and you. We're praying here for a good outcome and a speedy recovery.

Mike

All my love to the stricken one, believe me, I know how it feels to be either the one needing surgery, or the one in the waiting room.....

Please pass along a hug for me?

Alan,
What type of surgery is Helen having today and what is the reconstructive surgery she will be having?

Heidi

Back Again,

Helen is now in the recovery room. She had a HUGE decubitus ulcer (translation: bed sore) on her right buttock from her previous hospitalization that went crazy. I just spoke with the surgeon about 15 minutes ago. They cut all the way to the bone and an irregular cut, at its greatest dimensions, of approximately 6" X 9". The surgery went okay...there was a lot of bleeding and they had to do a carterizing.

What I am going to say next will sound as though I am trying to pat myself on the back, but that is not my intention. The surgeon said that I had done "such a great job" of cleansing and dressing the wound, that they may send her home with me tonight. We'll see.

When she was in the hsopital in the coma back in October and November, she went a full week during which they did not even sponge bathe her. We told them that she had draining and bleeding from a sore on her bottom. They never once looked at it...they just changed the sheets frequently. Can anyone spell L-A-W-Y-E-R? We are not greedy people, but that was such improper care and now Helen needs two surgeries because of it.

Gotta go. They just said that she is coming out of recovery.

Thanks everyone. the thoughts and prayers are greatly appreciated.

Al

Wow, Alan! Yes, I would certainly look into a law suit if it were me. I am assisting my husband's partner's widow with a lawsuit against the hospital that treated him. They gave him two drugs which have suicide as the side effects and did not tell his wife. He was over-drugged with those drugs and they mixed them with other major drugs that should not be mixed together. She has a suit for both negligence and human rights. It won't bring him back but it will certainly bring more awareness to those who do not know enough to ask about the types of drugs given in the hospital.

The main thing to know is that you can't leave things totally in the hands of the hospital and staff. You have to watch them!!!

Good job on taking such good care of your wife. Let us know how she is doing later on.

Take care,
Heidi

Hi Alan:

Thanks for the updates. Continuing to send all my best thoughts your way...

Scott

Thanks so much for checking in Alan,

sounds like the surgery was successful.... and safely over..for now

I hope and pray that they do indeed let you take Helen home tonight.
Our prayers will continue.....

Here's some more positive energy going your way, Al and Helen!

Sounds like things are progressing.

Get well soon Helen!
John

Al Both your wife and you are in my thoughts. You look after her and yourself.

Poor Helen... but she has you and that makes her very rich!! You both have been through the wringer and then some. Praying for strength of spirit as well.

Prayers sent your way today, Helen and Alan both.
Glad to hear the surgery was successful.
And yes - for this, definitely find legal help. This is a serious loss.

Bless you both as she recovers.
Linda

Dearest Alan and Ms Helen,

You KNOW my thoughts and prayers are and have been with you constantly!! The size of that wound sounds horrendous. I will pray not only for the blessing of healing for Helen but also for strength for you to cope with one more issue. I know you are a strong man and all that...but I do hope you are also taking care of yourself through all this. Definitely check into legal advice. These surgeries are one more financial setback you do NOT need.

Love 'n hugs,
Bobbie

Al
Thanks for the update friend. Decubitus Ulcers are always a risk when a person is bed ridden. It's the Nursing staff's duty to bath and turn the person frequently to prevent them getting started.
They can be very difficult to treat once they develop.

I am very happy to hear the surgery went well. Sorry to hear it was needed at all.

My best to you both. Stay positive friend.

I will pray for you both. And I think consulting a lawyer may be a good idea. Or at least threaten to sue so they do what they are supposed to do to care for her. Poor baby!

Hi Everyone!

Well, Helen did get to come home after the surgery and an appropriate time in recovery for additional evaluation. I guess I will give myself a pat on the back this time. If it's bragging, well, I guess that's what it is...Dr. Lionelli, her surgeon, said the only reason he was allowing her to go home was because of the "exemplary and fantastic" manner in which I have been cleansing and dressing the wound for the past 2 weeks. We were both surprised and very pleased with his decision. I've not been a very good citizen of the JPF Community as of late...but this is the primary reason why. There is so muych more to it, but I won't bore you stiff by whining about all of it. It's just that she and I have to come first. You do want to see her at Pineyfest this year...don'tcha?!?!

As Helen was in surgery, this huge snowstorwm we are "enjoying" here isn St. Louis began. We left the hospital at about 6:05 PM. We got home at 7:40. It's a distance of about 25 miles. We have a Ford Explorer. Since Helen cannot lie on her back or right side for at least a week, she had to lie in the back area, face-down all the home. Since children occassionally peek at the JPF boards, I'll not repeat exactly what some of her comments were! But, we did get home safely.

Helen is sleeping very soundly right now. But, before going to bed, she asked that I pass on her personal gratitude for your kindness. I echo her thought. We have the info one 3 law offices that specialize in this sort of litigation. We'll see where that goes. Take care, God Bless, and good night, all.

Alan & Helen

Dear Alan and Helen,

I will continue to pray for you and ask for God's help in maintaining your strength and Helen's healing.

Love and hugs,
Emily

Dear Alan,
Hurray! I'm sure Helen and you are so glad that she is home and safe. I also pray that you find the right attorney to assist you on that path.

Blessings,
Heidi

Sending you all my love, and good vibes!

I never stopped praying from the last time

Helen & Al you have a lot of love on your side!

Let the healing process begin and as much comfort as possible be with her during this difficult time. Helen's been in my little girl's and I's nightly prayers right next to Sub's name. Eight year olds have a direct line so ya got that goin' for ya. God Bless you all and Al I know she appreciates all you continue to do for her, it's a testament to your love for her. MJ

Alan & Helen -
Of course you know, you are always in my thoughts and prayers for healing and continuted strength. Such a long road! Take Care!
{{Hugs}}
Joanne

Al,
Y'all continue in our thoughts and prayers here...keep your chin up amigo.
JBW

Dear Alan....Have been praying....but did not know the specifics.
I have heard about the severe consequences of Dicube.....and the operations that follow. It's a shame that an institution that
helps so greatly....can also aggravate a condition.

Prayers for you both,
Kaley

Hey Al and Helen,

Thanks so much for the update and the news that phase one is over with. I hope you were able to have a sound sleep yourself -- a state which has probably eluded you for a while .

As for your "absence" on the board, gadzooks, Al, don't give it another thought. Our "loss" during this time was clearly Helen's "gain", as you tended so meticulously to her wound care. Still, that you should feel the need to apologize for this just further exemplifies what sort of a person you are.

Finally, we've already talked about the legal ramifications of this situation -- which thankfully are very much in your favor. But given the circumstances which precipitated the situation, wouldn't it be cathartic (and AWESOME) for her to be able -- in the name of closure -- to also ask for one of the negligent parties to "KISS her a$$"? I know, I know, two wrongs don't make a right, blah blah blah, but STILL!!!!

Anyway, hang in there you two....love and prayers heading your way...

xoxo,
Beth

I went through a similar situation with my mother a few years ago only the infection was on her left foot.
Same hospital & nursing home neglect.
It took about six months before it cleared up.
The point is that you really need a health care advocate(like Al)
in your corner.
The medical care (especially here in Florida)is minimal and questionable.
Arm yourself with as much knowledge as you possibly can about your particular situation.
I am glad that things are going well so far for Al & Helen!
Great job Al!

It sounds like your doctor is ok but don't be afraid to change doctors if you aren't happy with the one you have.
Changing doctors saved my mother's life.
I don't mean to sound preachy here but I have been going through this stuff for five years and I am just trying to provide some hopefully usefull information.

Lovin' you guys....

Here's to a MUCH brighter future for one and all.

!!!

You two are BOTH extrordinary people! Sending all my best wishes to you.

Hey Alan,
Just checking in to see how Helen is fairing.

So sorry to hear that the neglect of the hospital is causing so much pain and suffering to you and your wife. You would think with the thousands of dollars per day that they charge that they could give the best of care to their patience. If they neglect cleansing a person's wounds, it's no wonder super bugs are appearing in hospitals, caused by lack of sanitary cleaning of rooms and medical instruments.

So sorry to hear that the neglect of the hospital is causing so much pain and suffering to you and your wife. You would think with the thousands of dollars per day that they charge that they could give the best of care to their patience. If they neglect cleansing a person's wounds, it's no wonder super bugs are appearing in hospitals, caused by lack of sanitary cleaning of rooms and medical instruments.

Thanks Everyone!

You JPF members are putting your best foot forward. You are a kind, generous and caring group. Here's the latest on Helen:

Her surgery was early afternoon on Thursday. It appears to have been a success. She had a very, very good surgeon. There was substantial bleeding during the surgery; but we expected that. The surgery was scheduled so quickly, from necessity, that she was not able to be off of her Plavix (a blood anti-coagulant) for the desired and recommended time frame. The surgeon thinks that he got all of the infected tissue. Helen now has a cavity in her right butt cheek that is 6" wide, 9" high, and 5" deep. It is an open cavity as it could not be closed due to its immense size. She went home about 2 hours after the surgery. I have a medical background (visual health), so the surgeon was confident that I could handle her needs. He also said that I did a good job dressing her wound prior to the surgery. So, he was comfortable with the decision to leave her in my care.

It is a very ugly and impressive wound. I get to cleanse it and dress it twice daily. I packed it with about 6 feet of rolled gauze soaked in saline solution. I then dress it with 7 or 8 4x4 thick gauze pads and then cut a large section from an adult diaper to cover all of that. The reason for the adult diaper section is that she has a lot of drainage and some bleeding. The plastic outer layer does not allow that to drain through the gauze layers. Next week, we will start applying a special cream (Accuzyme for you medical types) to help keep it clean and prevent reinfection.

Depending on how well this heals, Helen may or may not need a subsequent surgery. If she does, it is a bear! It is reconstructive surgery. She would be in a rehab hospital for 4 to 8 weeks afterwards. But, if it heals okay on its own, the second surgery will not be needed. She'll just have a really ugly butt with a deep deppression.But that's okay if she doesn't require the second surgery.

She is taking iron pills, an antibiotic, a muscle relaxer and percocet for pain. Considering all that she has been through the past three years, she is in pretty good spirits. Over the past three years, she has had a heart attack, major back surgery (2 titanium rods in her back), been in a coma, hospitalized because her kidneys totally shut down...still don't know why...but she has regained full function of her kidneys, this surgery, her mother went "over the hill" with her Alzheimers, her MS has gone crazy, and two of her brothers have died. That's a bunch to deal with, folks! But, she's a strong woman. On Tuesday, she and I will have been married 15 years. So, you know she has a very high tolerance!

Thank you all, each and everyone of you, for your concern, prayers, best wishes and so forth. They make a difference.

Al

Dearest Al and Helen,
Wow! And I thought I had one tough year! Sounds like you can both start putting the bad times in the past and move forward into some much happier times! I'll pray that Helen does not need the second surgery. Many of us have ugly butts!!! At least they get to hide beneath the clothing!!!! Tell Helen that if you add up all my little indentations in my butt, they'd add up to more than her big indentation! LOL!

Please wish Helen a very happy anniversary for me and tell her that I am looking forward to meeting her BOTH in Las Vegas when you come to stay, and at Pineyfest!!!!!!!!!

Congratulations on 15 years together!

Heidi,

Thank you! I'll tell Helen what you said about the butt indentations. She will get a kick out of that! But, just so you will know, Helen says I have a gorgeous butt! So there...take that!

If Helen is medically able to go, she wiull be at Pineyfest this year. Helen grew up in a very protective environment and she finds it difficult to socialize. But, she had a MARVELOUS time at Pineyfest two years ago. She said it was like a family reunion without the jerks. She thoroughly enjoyed herself.

And thank you for the anniversary wishes. This time of year is very busy for us. Jan 30th is our daughter-in-law's birthday; Jan 31st is our sister-in-law's birthday; Feb 1st would be my father's birthday. He died in '69 He would have been 107 years old yesterday! Today is my brother's birthday; Feb 6th is our anniversary; Feb 8th is our daughter's birthday; Feb 9th is our son-in-law's birthday. Plus, there are 4 birthdays in March! The check book gets real nervous thus time of year.

Thanks a bunch, Heidi. You are always one of the first to offer your support and concern. Thank you for that!

Al

So, you have a cute butt? That's nice to know! I'm glad Helen will get a chuckle outta my indentation issues!

I love the line "like a family reunion without the jerks!" That sounds like it should be in a song! Anyway, I'm sure Helen will be surrounded by caring people at Pineyfest who will ensure that she feels comfortable and safe.

Blessings!

Heidi

Hey Al & Helen,

While many would have crumbled under similar circumstances, you two seem to have risen to the occasion. As they say, if it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger.

You two are clearly destined to be together, and hopefully will continue to care for and love each other for hopefully years to come...

Thanks for the update and hang in there....we're all thinking of you....

Cheers,
Beth

Howdy Al...and Ms Helen!!

We love you guys...and you KNOW I am still praying for you both...for strength, healing..and everything and anything else you may need!! Maybe we will have to have a DEPENDS DRIVE during Pineyfest this year!! Actually...I'd still love to orchestrate that ENSURE TOUR that Bob Young and I were talking about a few years back...sponsorship of course by DEPENDS, ENSURE, Preparation H, etc. That'd be SO much fun.

Back to the business at hand. Let no one say.."Turn the other cheek" when they talk to Helen. She must be in a lot of pain from this. Sounds like they removed a huge amount of tissue. Whew. I could always try to donate some if need be. Honest...I would gladly share!!

I do pray that Helen will not need another surgery...that this wound will heal on its own..with your loving and tender ministrations of course!! You are a dear soul. Helen could not have picked a better soul mate.

We ARE looking forward to seeing you BOTH at Pineyfest!!! We WILL take good care of you!!

Love 'n hugs,
Bobbie

Al,

I hope all of us have someone like you in our time of need, or have your fortitude and follow through when it's our turn to help! Thanks for sharing your struggles and victories. I bet there's a lot of us who can find comfort and strength from you two!

Brian

Heidi,

My butt is not simply cute, according to Helen it is GORGEOUS!!!! And not too long ago she even said I was pretty...pretty damned ugly!

Helen feels that because she is not well educated and uses less than optimal grammer, people do not enjuoy visiting with her. She has yet to realize that true friends don't care about that. She is very shy and introverted. But she really involved herselg at Pineyfest and thoroughly enjoyed it. She's a pretty cool lady!

Well, Joe Wrabeck has written a song about my underwear...by the way, my underwear is now part of the Pineyfest legacy...so I guess I could write a song about a butt with...and I am quoting Helen...one too many holes in it or a family reunion without the jerks. We'll see. Thanks a bunch!

Al

Beth,

Well thank you, ma'am! We are simply doing what has to be done. Sometimes it is overwhelming and really gets depressing, but we rebound and go to the next thing on the list. But, I gotta tell you...as strong as you think I am, there are times when I go into the other bedroom and just cry like a baby. But, I think that's a healthy thing to do. It purges the mind of the all the negative junk that's up there for a while.

Thank ya much for the kindness and greetings.

Al

Well, Mr. Alan, you just tell Miss Helen that it's the quality of the spiritual being that is important. All the other stuff is merely illusion! The biggest qualification I have when I choose my friends and workmates is the quantity of affinity that they put out. A person with a big heart and love of life is worth more in my book than anything else. The way in which you describe your wife surely shows how wonderful a person she is! It is going to be such a blessing to be in your presence! In fact, it is always a blessing to view your communication on these boards.

Sending cheerful vibes to you both!

Heidi

Bobbie,

I know that you are. You are a dear friend to both of us. Right now, she IS turning the other cheek! If you touch the one that was operated on, you will probably need surgery! I don't know if we're soul mates or destined to be together. I look at it a little more simplisticly...we happened to find each other and it's worked out pretty darned good.

You know how much I love that woman. But, I respect her equally. To have endured what she has over the past couple of years and still maintain her composure (most of the time!) and zest for life, that's pretty powerful. She's a good woman who has added so much to my life.

Thank you so much, Bobbie.

Luv and hugs going out to ya! See ya at Pineyfest!

Al

Brian,

Thank you. Those are very kind words. I am big believer in the human soul and choose to think that the great majority of folks would do the same thing. I could be wrong; but I certainly do not look upon myself as someone special. I'm just a pretty decent guy doing what needs to be done. Thanks agin for the support and very kind words. I/we appreciate that a lot.

Al

You two are a perfect example of the way that love is supposed to be. The way you tend to each other's needs is touching. God bless you both with continued years together with improved health just around the corner.

Best,
Lynn