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Joined: Apr 2001
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The Visit (c) 2007 by Mike Dunbar
Mr. Harvey sat in his cell, the guard cleared the dishes from his last meal and Harvey was finishing his coffee. Two more hours.
He turned and looked at the calendar that was on his wall, thinking about the days ahead. Days that would go on without him. He heard the cell door open and thought the Padre was a little early.
"Hello Mr. Harvey, mind if I call you Sam?"
Harvey turned and looked over at the preacher, he wasn't the regular chaplain, some new guy.
"They call me Harvey."
"That's all over now, Sam, you'll get a new name and a whole new life." The preacher smiled as if he believed it.
"You can cut the crap," Harvey said, "I'm going to lay on that gurney, feel the needle in my arm and that's it." Harvey felt almost sad for this preacher, for one, most guys on death row got religion by now. They'd repented and gave thanks for the opportunity to have a fresh start. Not Sam Harvey. For another, this poor sap, if he believed his own line, was going to just go to sleep too, and without ever having half the fun Harvey had.
"I've had fun, Sam" the preacher said. It gave Harvey a little shock. "Fun isn't just getting even or getting over on someone, fun, real fun, is knowing you've made things better. You've lived according to God's plan."
"Things don't get better, they just get worse and then you die." Harvey looked into the preacher's eyes. Gave him the prison stare. This preacher didn't flinch and didn't blink. For the first time since he'd been on the inside, Harvey broke off the stare. What good's that stupid prison game? Just a waste of time, a big waste of a very little time.
The preacher closed his eyes. "It can get better, if you want it bad enough. Here's the deal, Sam, you've got to want it bad enough to believe. God's just waiting for you to believe in him, then he'll keep his part of the bargain. You'll live forever, and things will be better...they'll be better than you could ever imagine."
"Pie in the sky?" Harvey said.
"Better than pie, Sam, you'll forget your Granny's cherry pie." Now how did he know that? "You'll forget you ever had a problem, you'll forget anything bad." The preacher laughed. What a time to laugh. "Close your eyes and listen to me...Oh Father, give my brother here a gift, give him the gift of faith. In my time of need you gave me bravery...give him faith that he will be with me today." The cell door clicked.
Harvey opened his eyes and looked up. "That's it?" he thought. Where did that guy go? No questions about his crimes or his sins? No messages to send to his family? What kind of preacher was this?
The guard came to the cell. "OK, Mr. Harvey, the Chaplain's here to see you."
"He was just here." Harvey looked puzzled. There was the Chaplain standing next to the guard. "You must have let him out, he was just here."
The Chaplain and the guard looked at each other. "No one's been here Mr. Harvey." the guard said, "I...I'd have known." The guard opened the door to the cell and the Chaplain came in with a funny expression on his face.
When the guard left, the Chaplain asked him, "This man you say was here, was he about my size with brown hair and blue eyes?"
"Yeah," Harvey said, "That's right. You know him?"
"No," said the Chaplain, "but I've heard of him." The Chaplain shook his head and looked puzzled. Then he took a deap breath and began the litany. "Mr. Harvey, have you accepted the Lord into your heart."
"Wait a minute," Harvey said, "What about the other preacher?"
"Mr. Harvey, I really can't talk about him, I don't know what to say, I don't want to give you bad advice...please...let's continue. Is there anything you want to say to me?"
"Yes, I want to know where he went?"
"Mr. Harvey, the guard and I have been sitting in the hall for at least a half an hour while I filled out the paperwork. Now please let me continue, sir, are there people you want me to contact? Are there things you want to talk about?"
Harvey was speechless. It was his last chance. "I believe." He said.
"Did you say something, Mr. Harvey?"
"Naw Padre, just go on, you can go, tell them...tell them I'm sorry for the trouble I've caused. Tell them all it's ok. He took time...for me...He came here just for me! Tell them...just tell them all it's ok." Harvey began laughing.
#################
After the execution, the warden walked slowly back to his office. He had only done this a few times, but he didn't think he would ever get used to it. Could anyone? It was the hardest part of his job, but at least this one was a little easier. The chaplain followed him in and took a seat, followed by the guard. Finally, the assistant chaplain entered and shut the door before sitting.
"Well, gentlemen," said the warden, "the important thing is, Mr. Harvey was saved. As long as we must carry out the will of the state, our little conspiracy can at least send a few souls to God's peace."
You've got to know your limitations. I don't know what your limitations are. I found out what mine were when I was twelve. I found out that there weren't too many limitations, if I did it my way. -Johnny Cash It's only music. -niteshift Mike Dunbar Music
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Joined: Nov 2005
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Wow! So, they were tricking the inmates into thinking they'd witnessed something supernatural? Interesting writing. I enjoyed it a lot.
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Joined: Dec 2000
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Mike, I hate to say it but that plot sounds implausible. I can't imagine a chaplain participating in such a scam(unless profit was involved) or a warden, either. Even the most liberal of clergymen would know it's truth, not trickery, that would "save" a sinner. The dialogue and imagery seems a little dry, too. good luck with it.
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Joined: Apr 2001
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Thanks Vanessa,
It was just for fun.
Thanks couchgrouch,
What caused me to write it was just what you touched on. Would the sinner be saved? Why not?
You've got to know your limitations. I don't know what your limitations are. I found out what mine were when I was twelve. I found out that there weren't too many limitations, if I did it my way. -Johnny Cash It's only music. -niteshift Mike Dunbar Music
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Joined: Dec 2000
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Biblically speaking because "the TRUTH(not tricks) will set you free". I already mentioned that in my first reply. any clergyman would know that. the plot doesn't ring true.
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Joined: Apr 2001
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So, if the man repents, says he believes and accepts the Lord, then when he gets to the gates St. Peter says: no go? I thought it was John 3:16 that worked, not what some preacher says or does, a personal relationship.
However I agree, it doesn't ring true, I never expected it would. Probably the only thing I've got that rings true is Another One, though I think I came close with David and Ann.
You've got to know your limitations. I don't know what your limitations are. I found out what mine were when I was twelve. I found out that there weren't too many limitations, if I did it my way. -Johnny Cash It's only music. -niteshift Mike Dunbar Music
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Joined: Nov 2005
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Well it reminds me of this--- "Greater love hath no man than to lay down his life for a brother". The chaplain is willing to be guilty of trickery or lying (and risk losing his salvation for purposely committing a sin) in order to convince an inmate of the Truth---the truth that he might not otherwise have had the courage to believe. Why? Possibly because of the misrepresentation he'd witnessed from other more conservative and self-righteous clergy. Just my 2 cents--tarnished as they are--but I think IISamuel (particularly chapter 18) sets up a precedent for wise men going against the King's command for the right motive. Who am I to judge?
PS. Also, this reminds me of how so many parents are willing to lie to their children about Santa in order to create a sense of starry eyed hope. And how many wink at that?
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Joined: Apr 2001
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It's interesting, and perhaps ironic, that this discussion revolves around big "T" Truth, and what rings true in fiction.
Jesus spoke in parables, Solomon tricked the women by pretending to split the baby (of course, one could argue that he would have actually done it, but to me, that doesn't ring true.) The Bible speaks often of Truth, yet the commandments never say "thou shalt not lie." Instead, they quite specifically say one should not "...bear false witness AGAINST..." In my poorly written story, it was just this that I tried to explore: can a fiction lead one to truth? And, further, can deception lead one to truth?
Some of this concerns "argumentum ad hominem." If someone falsifies their credentials and becomes a teacher, then tells the class that 2+2=4, is it then not truth? Can a sinner save a soul? No, we can only save our own souls, so, conversely, neither can a sinner negate the saving of a soul. Take a preacher, for example, who has lost faith but continues teaching the Gospel. Are the folks who hear and accept his word not saved? Maybe this is the way I should have approached the subject, making it seem more plausible, but I find myself entertained by things on or over the edge of plausibility, for example: Twilight Zone, Stephen King, Alfred Hitchcock, Star Wars, and American politics.
All the Best, Mike
You've got to know your limitations. I don't know what your limitations are. I found out what mine were when I was twelve. I found out that there weren't too many limitations, if I did it my way. -Johnny Cash It's only music. -niteshift Mike Dunbar Music
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There's more truth in fiction than the evening news.
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I enjoyed the story, it was very good. I did not think ending was unrealistic. Getting 3 people in on a non-profitable conspiracy is unlikely but not impossible.
I think if anything could alter, twist or mutate a persons faith, it would be working on death row. Perhaps they got to talking after a particularly gruesome execution, perhaps the executed prisoner was one that seemed to truely believe and confessed to all his sins, but insisted he did not commit the murder he was being executed for. He denied it while looking them straight in the face. maybe a week/month/year later DNA evidence proves it really was someone else.
They would probably all want to quit, but maybe they have families and no other job prospects so they are stuck with this delema... question, "how can we be even a small part of these executions?" answer "because we cant let our families go hungry" question "then how can we make our part in it less evil?" answer "see Mike's story above"
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PS. Also, this reminds me of how so many parents are willing to lie to their children about Santa in order to create a sense of starry eyed hope. And how many wink at that?
Hi Mike, and Vanessa, (ahem) I don't lie to my children when I tell them Santa is real. Santa IS real ... very real... he's just got a secret identity like any other superhero, which is... me.  They get told the rest of the story when they're much older. But I don't consider it lying. (We don't play him up real big, either.) OK, on to the story.  It's an interesting setup, that's for sure. Can I suspend my disbelief? Sure. They're acting according to what they believe is necessary to save the man. Was Harvey the inmate saved? My take--not yet, but he might figure it out once he's been on the other side a while.  But my theology runs a little different from many other Christian sects. I'll drop it there rather than get in a huge discussion about it. The story's just for fun! Mike said so. Literary-wise, is it working? Mostly. It runs into a little trouble where the first preacher apparently reads Harvey's thoughts. If he's not supernatural--as shown at the end--then there needs to be a scientific way he's doing that. Either make the fellow a psychic, give him a gizmo hidden in his pocket that reads minds, or just rewrite it to knock that part out. And can a fiction lead to truth? Did you see "Leap of Faith" with Steve Martin as the showman evangelist? Great movie. Linda
Last edited by Linda P. Adams; 04/12/07 12:54 AM.
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Thanks all,
Linda, thanks, my thinking was that, like the "mind readers" and "mentalists" who seem to know what someone is thinking, our assistant preacher knew, from information supplied by the guard and the warden, some of the inmate's thinking patterns. When the magician Houdini visited the Czarina of Russia, he was given audience on the balcony overlooking the city of St. Petersburg. He, in his typical hubris, told the Czarina that he would now grant any wish she desired. The Czarina said she would like, once again, to hear the bells of St. Petersburg's cathedral which had been silent since she was a child (the bell ropes had rotted away and there was no stairway to reach the bells). Houdini waved his arms and soon the bells began to ring.
Houdini had researched the Czarina and was fairly certain, given the location of their audience, that this was what she would ask. Across the square in the hotel window, his wife waited for the signal, his waving arms, and then began shooting at the bells with an air rifle. Now THAT'S magic!
I thought about it, but my decision to leave out the explanation in the denouement was to sacrifice a little more of the ring of truth to the dramatic effect of brevity. Plus this leaves a little more mystery in the story. I'll look at it again in a while, after having some time for perspective, and perhaps include the guard mentioning Harvey's continual references to the fun he'd had and his grandmother's cherry pies.
All the Best, Mike
You've got to know your limitations. I don't know what your limitations are. I found out what mine were when I was twelve. I found out that there weren't too many limitations, if I did it my way. -Johnny Cash It's only music. -niteshift Mike Dunbar Music
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