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Riot Fest
by Gary E. Andrews - 06/21/26 10:51 PM
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Hard-Fi
by Gary E. Andrews - 06/19/26 06:43 PM
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 797
Serious Contributor
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OP
Serious Contributor
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 797 |
Hello everyone!
It’s been ages since I posted some lyrics here…. Here’s something I just starting writing a couple of days ago. I’m thinking it needs a bridge but I can’t find anything new to say….also, I know the rhymes aren’t perfect here and there but I kinda like it like that…. Anyway, it’s a mid tempo country-rocker, let me know what you think…
NOBODY’S BETTER THAN ME
©2007 Juan Albarran
Man, it never fails, ev’ry other day
I see the same kinda guy
In a suit and a tie
Always lookin’ down at everyone around
Like the world is his
With his thick stack of bills
I don’t know who he thinks he is
But…
CHORUS
We all were born with nothing on
We will end up ‘neath a head stone
I can’t understand how it came to this
I was raised to believe
I’m better than nobody
And nobody’s better than me
If I live by cotton fields, or on top of a hill
If I don’t believe in
The same you believe in
New or old school, vote red or blue
If where I was born
Ain’t where you come from
Why does it have to be a problem at all?
CHORUS
We all were born with nothing on
We will end up ‘neath a head stone
I can’t understand how it came to this
I was raised to believe
I’m better than nobody
And nobody’s better than me
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 10,690
Top 10 Poster
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Top 10 Poster
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 10,690 |
Hi Juan
welcome back!!!
nice write, some parts read choppy, yet I think they'll sing well
anywho this section
If I live by cotton fields, or on top of a hill
If I don’t believe in
The same you believe in
New or old school, vote red or blue
If where I was born
Ain’t where you come from
Why does it have to be a problem at all?
looks like a bridge to me...
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Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 3,199
Top 100 Poster
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Top 100 Poster
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 3,199 |
Juan,
I think you'll want to have the guy "talking down" to you in the first verse rather than assume he's looking down at the world. It comes off a bit like jealousy if the shiny dude don't do nothing to make us resent his attitude. Show me that attitude.
I think its a good idea that sells.
John
Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword never had an editor.
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 797
Serious Contributor
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OP
Serious Contributor
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 797 |
Nice suggestion... thanks!
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,654
Top 100 Poster
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Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,654 |
Juan, Glad to see you back around these parts. I had a hard time getting a rhythm for this one, but then again I ain't no singer either. Looks like a good start on a fresh angle. Had a thought for a bridge, tuck it or chuck it.  Too bad the rich won't ever soften, Money means nothing in a coffin, When they're told they won't hear it, Can't put cash value on spirit... Write on bud. Dano.
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