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Uptempo...fun lil number.<g>

What Do This Button Do?
(c) 2002 dawg BMI

I knew this ol' boy
back in school....
won't too smart,
won't too cool.
Went for a job
at an open pit mine.
Wandered around
just to kill some time.
Poor boy did not
have a clue
when he muttered...
what do this button do?

(Chorus)
SLAM! BAM!
HOT DAMN!
Reminds me alot 'o Viet Nam.
WHAM! BOOM!
Clear the room.
Don't believe I'd breathe them fumes.

Needless to say
he lost the job.
Now wanders around,
an unkempt slob.
Ya ain't got to whisper.
He can't hear a thing;
cept' a continuous hum
and a high pitched ring.

(Chorus)
SLAM! BAM!
HOT DAMN!
Reminds me alot 'o Viet Nam.
WHAM! BOOM!
Clear the room.
Don't believe I'd breathe them fumes.

Opened the door;
walked on in.
No one there
to say "no" to him.
Then he SAW the controls
of the big draw bridge.
The operator
had gone to the fridge
returned with a coke
and Yelled, "Hey you!"
as our hero asked.....
"what do this button do?"

(Chorus)
SLAM! BAM!
HOT DAMN!
Reminds me alot 'o Viet Nam.
WHAM! BOOM!
Clear the room.
Don't believe I'd breathe them fumes.

Went on vacation
with a couple o' pals.
Took the tour
at Cape Canaveral.
Wandered away
for a moment or two,
last heard mumblin'
what do this button do....

(Chorus/End)
SLAM! BAM!
HOT DAMN!
Reminds me alot 'o Viet Nam.
WHAM! BOOM!
Clear the room.
Don't believe I'd breathe them fumes.


[This message has been edited by greydog (edited 05-01-2002).]

Hey, Dawg! You got a winner here! I like it a lot, as-is! No nits to report, just another job well done by the Dawg! See Ya ! Roy

Hi dawg....

Been missing you and Bobbie lately.
Now, I don't know if I was supposed to laugh at this one, but I sure thought it was funny! I guess if it were true, it wouldn't be so darn funny....but if it's not, it's hilarious. Real cute.

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http://artists2.iuma.com/IUMA/Bands/Sharon_Longworth/

Mornin' Roy...

Coffee is on if you'd care for a cup. (It's pretty darn good this mornin' too.)

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. Both are appreciated.

dawg

Mornin' Munchkin....

Well Bobbie is still recoverin' from the songwriting seminar in Breckenridge and I have been concentrating on learning the music end a bit better.

Sis has been kind enough to direct me to a music notation program and I am now struggling to learn it.<g> and ya know what they say about ol' dawgs and new tricks.

Thanks for the read and the kind words.

dawg

Hi Dawgy,

So glad to see you back at JPF (Even though it's a temporary fix, it's feeding my addiction. )

This lyric scares the bejeezus out of me! It reminds me of following a toddler around a china shop hoping he doesn't start touching things. But that's a good thing for this lyric. I'm thinkin it's supposed to make us laugh... nervously !

Happy you're back and the party is inching up on us... won't be long and we'll be raising a glass together!!!

Tink

Tink darlin'....good mornin' to ya!

The title/hook is one of those "famous last words"...like

"Hey ya'll....watch this!"
"See, it's not loaded..."
"I can do that with my eyes closed."
"Indians...what indians?"
"No way he can hit a target from that distance...."

I have just been trying to concentrate more on the musical side lately and with a heavier work schedule that last year I have fewer hours of "discretionary time".<g>

Thanks for the read and the kind words...You get a sweet roll tomorrow morning.

dawg

Fun read. I know people like this...that's the scary thing to me, lol. The chorus doesn't really hold all the stories together that well, but for a howler like this, that doesn't matter so much. Thanks for the laugh.

Corey

Mornin Dawg,
You be right. Tis a fun lil number
Feels almost like reading the bio on Wiley Coyote. (picturing this guy walking away looking like a crispy critter.

Prolly shouldn't, but if I was to nit this, I'd say that when this poor fool is at Cape Canaveral (and of course I thought "Canaveral" rhymed with "seagull").. isn't he in the control room, 'stead of being inside a rocket? and therefore t'aint him that's "last seen"

Well I said I shouldn't nit and guess I shouldn't have


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Harriet

Mornin' Corey...

Since the story (verses) are sorta 3rd person past tense, I wanted the chorus to be active and loud...but with sounds that could be a chemical barge slamming into a bridge abuttment as well as an explosion.

Thanks for the read and response.

dawg

Mornin' Harriet,

I swear, honest-to-gosh, no-kiddin'....the term "last seen" is not in the last verse.<g>

Thanks for the read and the nice words and thought...and the mental picture of Wily...

dawg

Fun read, dawg. Glad to see ya on the board. I'd say "WHAM! BOOM!" or something like that instead of "Big kaboom!", and I'd make it clearer that there was a chemical barge involved in the drawbridge verse, but beyond that, this is a winner. Nice job. And *great* job that you have the patience to learn an instrument! I keep giving up whenever I try that.

Anthony

Thanks Anth....

The WHAM! BOOM! is in there. It is just a matter of learning the piano/keyboard to the extent that it carries a tune soooo much better than I do and it is much easier to pick up the melody on a piano for writing the music, which is what I am after.

Thanks for the read and the suggestions.

dawg

Hey Dawg....

Hey..can Dawg come out and play..?

No...No, he's gotta take his PIANO lesson !

Some things never change I guess....
This is fun..kinda sounds like Bubba whats-his-name...or Cletis somebody..you know..one of them country comedy guys..

Keep practicing !

Bob

Afternoon Ol' timer....

The worst part, I am running into is that I work the day job from home and use the same 'puter for songs and work. So far everytime I get about half finished with scoring a page, the phone will ring with a customer and I jump to my work program without saving....

They didn't idiot proof it enough for me.<g>
Sometimes I like the short, choppy tempo of one like this.

Thanks for the read and sympathy.

dawg

Evenin' Noel,

How is everything in Oz, ol' friend. Just wanted you to know, letter is enroute.

Thanks for the read and response. I'll have to cogitate on that change for a bit.

dawg

Aw, this'n is REAL FUN, Amigo!

I'm watchin' a Program on Genocide on PBS and suddenly start Laughin' Like MAD, and La Femme's lookin' at me like I need Commitment...heh!

But the World NEEDS Great FUN Songs Like THIS'n....just to Heal Itself!

Gets FUNNIER Every Read!

"KUDOS" Amigo!
Big Guy-Hug
Stan

allus glad to add a lil levity, Big Guy....

amassin' quite the collection of famous last words....

"I wonder where the mama bear is...."
"Now which wire was I supposed to cut....."
"Hey cap'n...after I pull the pin, how high do I count....."
"Here, you hold my beer and hand me that chainsaw...."
"Don't worry...I seen this on TV"
"No problemo....it's fireproof"
"Go ahead...taste it....these are the GOOD kind of mushrooms.."

Thanks for the read and the kind words.

dawg

OOhh...That's INSPIRATIONAL...Bud'!

Lessee:

Let's Cut Down that Hornet's Nest...It's been Empty since Last Year...

Go on an' Pet BOWSER...he's the TAMEST Pit Bull you Ever SEEN...

Shucks, We'll just need a li'l EXTRA Rosin & we can climb that East Face BAREHANDED...

Betcha we can BEAT That Diesel...

Watch me Scare that Cop with this Cap Pistol...

Sword Swallerin's Lots EASIER than it Looks...SEE?

That only LOOKS Like a Coral Snake...It's Harmless...Catch!

SURE We Can Go Fishin', Boys...Her Period Don't Start 'till Tomorrow!

Bring Dad the Gas Can...these Briquets keep goin' Out....

WOW..This Dynamite's been sittin' here since 1934...

I Ain't Afraid of NO Karate Instructor...

DARE Ya to Spear that Barracuda...HA..Ya MISSED!

ALWAYS Wanted to Try My hand at The Trapeeze...

G'Nighty GUYS...(LUCKILY...My Wife's a Late-SLEEPER and a BAD Shot...) Heh-Heh...oh..hi dear...........

NICE KITTY-KITTY...OH...You're NOT a KITTY..You're A..........................

LEMMIE Dust Off that Letter you just got from AFGHANISTAN....

HELL, These BRAKES have been SQUEEKIN' For YEARS!-----

FORTUNATELY, Elephants ALWAYS Wiggle their Tails BEFORE They ATTACK...........

Edna's Gotten Over that Affair I had...Heck, she even packed my Parachute Today...

I don't care HOW Big You ARE, that was MY Parking Space...

Watch what Happens when Daddy Adds THIS to your Model Rocket's Fuel...

QUIET SON...I got my EAR Down on this RAIL Listenin' for the Train To Come...


{Lordy, this was Evil Fun, Amigo...Gotta DO This AGAIN Sometime...but it's now 1AM & I Was gonna Get to bed Early Tonight!}

Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

Awww man, You are getting into this, Big Guy

"Remember, when ya wanna surf a Tsunami, its just a matter of timing..."
"are you sure the power is off?"
"I'll not only race you to dead man's curve; I'll spot you a car length and take the outside lane..."

dawg

G'day Greydog, Gee Cobber, I wish I could write songs as good as you. You got it all in your song and lots of action. So all I am gonna say is -"IT'S GREAT, MATE!" and best wishes, Ray in Australia.

Hidee Dawg,

You're my second one!

Lots of fun stuff here, but IMO a tad of overkill.

Maybe take the

Needless to say
he lost the job.
Now wanders around,
an unkempt slob.
Ya ain't got to whisper.
He can't hear a thing;
cept' a continuous hum
and a high pitched ring.

and move it to the end.

I know it messes with your structure, but this does seem better to use as a closer.

BTW, how many songs do we all get on the porch??

Yo GD: another candidate for "Here's your Sign". /glen

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"The process of learning is often more important than what is being learned"
-----The Kat----
Glen King
Music Domains For Sale.
http://www.musicdomains.cc

Thanks guys,

But I thought this lil bit o' fluff was gone like four days ago. I come on to post another one and find this back at the top.

Thanks for taking time to read and respond.

Johnny V...you are right. Than prolly would be better as a close.

dawg

Hi, Dawg!
Cute. Kind of reminds me of the Cat Came Back. Only not enough lives.

Won't too smart?

Do you mean like warn't ?

Continuous is hard to sing in that line. How about:
cept' a STEADY hum


This verse needs some smoothing:

Opened the door;
walked on in.
No one there
to say "no" to him.
Then he SAW the controls
of the big draw bridge.
The operator
had gone to the fridge
returned with a coke
and Yelled, "Hey you!"
as our hero asked.....
"what do this button do?"

Maybe the last chorus should say:

Bam!


Sis

I just had to add my way to go to this one! I have smiled so much at you and Stan that now my jaws hurt! Excellent!
Tony

Well Sis, and Jean...

I am trying. Don't believe ya'll are still reading and commenting on this ol' thang.

I love your changes and am incorporating them "in toto".

Thank you, so much.

dawg

ps...somehow, I got stuck with the wrong font in Finale Notepad...and all I get are peaches instead of quarter notes and bibles and stuff...<g> I am workin on it...

dawg

Uhhh Tony,

The nice words are appreciated....but have you seen a dentist? We really ain't that funny.

dawg

been watchin' that title for a while, even used the expression in a comment or an email somehere as i recall. Finaly got time to have a look and it floats along real good dawg.
I do have a bit of trouble connecting the logic in the chorus' as it goes down. Particularly the fumes as related to the draw bridge???
Good and fun though for sure. Now to se what this submit reply button do.
Graham

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http://artists3.iuma.com/IUMA/Bands/Graham_Henderson/

Mornin' Graham,

I don't believe this silly lil lyric has been taking up space on page one for a week now. It must die!<g>

Got a call from Stan this morning. He should be here this evening...trying to find some zin now...

Thanks for the read and response.

dawg

It has got me beat Dawg. I write something I really feel is gunna get close to the Wow factor and the Zero in the middle of the wow is all it raises. Or close to.
Then I write a dumb little formular thing and it flies hits the chrarts and totally confuses me.
I ain't gunna try and work it out. I'm just gunna keep doing it.
Regards.
Graham


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http://artists3.iuma.com/IUMA/Bands/Graham_Henderson/