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For Dom
by JAPOV - 04/30/26 09:52 PM
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Nothing
by JAPOV - 04/27/26 10:49 AM
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WHEN?
by JAPOV - 04/23/26 11:28 PM
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Joined: Oct 2001
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If you were gonna write a song around this theme. Throw out a hook or title or idea. Just curious.
My Mother always told me.. "never love something, that can't love you back" like a car, money, fame, glory.......etc. What topic would work do you think?
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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Funny. Learn to love your own vocal…it’s all you’ve got.
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Funny. Learn to love your own vocal…it’s all you’ve got. I accept it... that's the best I can do...
DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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I sing like a bloodhound howling in heat
But the voice in my head sounds so sweet
DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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If you were gonna write a song around this theme. Throw out a hook or title or idea. Just curious.
My Mother always told me.. "never love something, that can't love you back" like a car, money, fame, glory.......etc. What topic would work do you think? Material things. So disappointing. I conquered the state Then died the next day Alone
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Funny. Learn to love your own vocal…it’s all you’ve got. I accept it... that's the best I can do... But we still love it Because it’s you
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I sing like a bloodhound howling in heat
But the voice in my head sounds so sweet My guitar drips with the blues Cause' my vocal chords are in my shoes...
DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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But then what would Dylan do
Triple down on ideas for you
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DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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ok ok............... damn it's like trying to coral chickens in this place!! hahahhah
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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ok ok............... damn it's like trying to coral chickens in this place!! hahahhah Ha! Usually, I like a woman who takes charge. Usually...
DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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Don't make me throw some corn at you buddy!! hahahah
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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Promises, promises...
Somebody write me a line!
DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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Joined: Jun 2019
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DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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Joined: Oct 2001
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"It Mattered to THAT One"
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"It Mattered to THAT One"
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He's talking about who we call Elvis or maybe you might call him Ben.
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"What would Epictetus say?"
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A black hole will steal all the light from the sky
Emptiness won’t stop a fall
Love isn’t meant to make anyone cry
A heart deserves better than nothing at all
Peace,
Dave
"Where there's a Gill, there's a way"
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A black hole will steal all the light from the sky
Emptiness won’t stop a fall
Love isn’t meant to make anyone cry
A heart deserves better than nothing at all
Peace,
Dave Very nice as always. A suggestion: "A black hole will steal the light from a thousand stars." Love wasnt meant to leave tears and scars.
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Good gravy, that’s some gravel…excellent as usual
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You presume he would even join. Why should he?
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"What would Epictetus say?" Interesting title/hook. Let’s use that one. Read up on his philosophy…and see if he has a theory on who do you love for max return.
Last edited by Bill Draper; 01/04/26 09:51 PM.
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Buyer beware:no love returns
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"What would Epictetus say?" That might be tuff , most folks never heard of him , People don't google things while listening to songs
We’re all built from the same dust and dreams,
Different roads, but the same means.
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"What would Epictetus say?" Interesting title/hook. Let’s use that one. Read up on his philosophy…and see if he has a theory on who do you love for max return. I think the point my Mom was trying to make is don't love "things"<<<<<
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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My Mama named me Bullfrog
Cause I croaked when the doctor slapped me
Cigars, martinis, and girls in bikinis
Were the only things that made this baby happy
DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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You can love a memory but it can't love you back
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"My Mother always told me.. "never love something, that can't love you back" like a car, money, fame, glory.......etc."
"Things, That Can't Love Me Back"
(Verse I)
Momma warned me, 'bout boys like you.
"They love their cars, and their hair-dos!
They'll love everything, and say they love you.
That's how you'll know, it isn't true."
(Chorus)
Don't love things, that can't love you back!!
The face in the mirror, when the mirror cracks.
I fell for you! I ran off my track!
You're one of thoseThings, That Can't Love Me Back!
(Verse II)
Momma told me! I listened too!
I kept my distance! I always knew
When things got heavy, and I wanted to.
I couldn't help, falling for you!
Don't love things, that can't love you back!!
The face in the mirror, when the mirror cracks.
I fell for you! I ran off my track!
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back
(Bridge)
Momma said, "I told you so!
That's okay girl! Let it go!
Take his love and give some back!
Love the thing, that can't love you back."
Don't love things, that can't love you back!
The face in the mirror, when the mirror cracks.
I fell for you! I ran off my track!
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back
(Coda)
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back
There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
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You can love a memory but it can't love you back thats good
We’re all built from the same dust and dreams,
Different roads, but the same means.
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"My Mother always told me.. "never love something, that can't love you back" like a car, money, fame, glory.......etc."
"Things, That Can't Love Me Back"
(Verse I)
Momma warned me, 'bout boys like you.
"They love their cars, and their hair-dos!
They'll love everything, and say they love you.
That's how you'll know, it isn't true."
(Chorus)
Don't love things, that can't love you back!!
The face in the mirror, when the mirror cracks.
I fell for you! I ran off my track!
You're one of thoseThings, That Can't Love Me Back!
(Verse II)
Momma told me! I listened too!
I kept my distance! I always knew
When things got heavy, and I wanted to.
I couldn't help, falling for you!
Don't love things, that can't love you back!!
The face in the mirror, when the mirror cracks.
I fell for you! I ran off my track!
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back
(Bridge)
Momma said, "I told you so!
That's okay girl! Let it go!
Take his love and give some back!
Love the thing, that can't love you back."
Don't love things, that can't love you back!
The face in the mirror, when the mirror cracks.
I fell for you! I ran off my track!
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back
(Coda)
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back Thats good too
We’re all built from the same dust and dreams,
Different roads, but the same means.
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I think the point my Mom was trying to make is don't love "things"<<<<< That is the same point that Epictetus made...2000 years ago. "Externals" Dont get wrapped up in things that can be taken away.
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I think Epictetus might be hard to sing.. LOL
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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I think Epictetus might be hard to sing.. LOL You are way too picky.  "Don't get wrapped up in things that can be taken away" might emerge in some form as a lyrical line.
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I won't need anything when I'm dead
===MY LOVER LIKES TO LAUGH IN BED!!!===
DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT'S ALREADY BEEN DELETED...
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I won't need anything when I'm dead
===MY LOVER LIKES TO LAUGH IN BED!!!=== Got a vision of Townes Van Zandt Waiting Around to Die.
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No Suno Frank It’s insider. But suno may be taken away soon?
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I won't need anything when I'm dead
===MY LOVER LIKES TO LAUGH IN BED!!!=== Got a vision of Townes Van Zandt Waiting Around to Die. Hmmmmmn... I Can't imagine a better way Living free with my last breath I only hope to expire Laughing with my lover in bed
DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE... CANCEL CULTURE IS ALIVE AND WELL @JPF!
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Yes. Vision of Townes now gone
Bill
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Gary , great effort to root out a lyric..............do you like it? Are YOU satisfied it says all you want it to?
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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I think Epictetus might be hard to sing.. LOL You are way too picky. "Don't get wrapped up in things that can be taken away" might emerge in some form as a lyrical line. I like the idea. Let’s each write a version. Then compare. Here or at Muse. Muse has similar problems as jpf, but you may find it more to your liking.
Last edited by Bill Draper; 01/05/26 08:05 PM.
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Well Bill, my mother also always said, "pick your battles".... so best we can do is ignore them like they're not here. I'm not going to respond to that stuff anymore, it's futile. No biggie to me, one way or the other. I'll get working on my version.
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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Well Bill, my mother also always said, "pick your battles".... so best we can do is ignore them like they're not here. I'm not going to respond to that stuff anymore, it's futile. No biggie to me, one way or the other. I'll get working on my version. Figured that. I am mentored by you, in a way, if you didn’t know, so don’t want your forward artistic momentum blocked or hindered.
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Well Bill, my mother also always said, "pick your battles".... so best we can do is ignore them like they're not here. I'm not going to respond to that stuff anymore, it's futile. No biggie to me, one way or the other. I'll get working on my version. Figured that. I am mentored by you, in a way, if you didn’t know, so don’t want your forward artistic momentum blocked or hindered. I'm flattered that I can be of any help, thank you for saying so. I enjoy reading your work and listening.
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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You presume he would even join. Why should he? ha ha ha , Whos Frank
We’re all built from the same dust and dreams,
Different roads, but the same means.
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I'm all for simplicity.
It's poetry; not prose, meaning a novel has 50,000 words to tell a story.
A Song has... well, I'll have to go back and count. (About 203 words)
But I simply worked within a Structure of Stanzas, Verses, Chorus and Repeat, Bridge if necessary. Rhythm and Rhyme.
I don't think I saw a Verse III to complete the Storyline in a satisfactory way, so I resorted to a Bridge, to break the Repetition with a variant Melody, Rhyme-Scheme (perhaps), and pivotal information to 'turn' the Story back to a final giving of the Chorus.
It's a 'dashoff', written without guitar in hand, simply 'obeying' Structural dictates.
I need to reread it because I remember some Grab-A-Rhyme in there that only 'fit' the Storyline without being significant.
Oh yeah. I remember thinking the concept is really a metaphor, 'things' that can't love you back, emphasizing that sometimes you get into relationships and find out the person doesn't have it in them to love you back. Either they lack the appreciation of another Human Being, or simply love themselves too much (Narcissism seems like it's being talked about a lot these days.)
"My Mother always told me.. "never love something, that can't love you back" like a car, money, fame, glory.......etc."
"Things, That Can't Love Me Back"
(Verse I)
Momma warned me, 'bout boys like you. (I liked introducing the Singer-Character and Love-Interest Character in Line 1.)
"They love their cars, and their hair-dos! (I've long been a critic of the 'Look at my car! How's my hair!' people.)
They'll love everything, and say they love you.
That's how you'll know, it isn't true." (This Line doesn't seem to have 'effect'. Just a Grab-A-Rhyme.)
(Chorus)
Don't love things, that can't love you back!! (There's the essential concept, that I take as metaphor for male-female relationship.)
The face in the mirror, when the mirror cracks.(This Grab-A-Rhyme takes the focus off him to come back on her. Not real good.)
I fell for you! I ran off my track! (I like the first phrase, emphasizing her dilemma, but not the second phrase.)
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back! (And this is just 'okay', saying plainly what I think is the main point.)
(Verse II)
Momma told me! I listened too! (My Verse II Repeats the dilemma concept, she's interacting with him and knows he can't hold up his end.)
I kept my distance! I always knew
When things got heavy, and I wanted to.
I couldn't help, falling for you! (Verse II does what I expected it to. Simply Repeat the Melody, new Lyric, Structure, and Repeat Chorus)
Don't love things, that can't love you back!!
The face in the mirror, when the mirror cracks.
I fell for you! I ran off my track!
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back
(Bridge)
Momma said, "I told you so!
That's okay girl! Let it go!
Take his love and give some back!
Love the thing, that can't love you back." (Momma's advice sounds like she's saying the Singer-Character should stay in the relationship despite having learned the flawed Character of the Love-Interest Character.)
Don't love things, that can't love you back!
The face in the mirror, when the mirror cracks.
I fell for you! I ran off my track!
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back
(Coda)
You're one of those Things, That Can't Love Me Back
The Structural Repetition is fairly strong, four 'hits' on THE Hook, the Title Line, driving that home to the listener as the main idea.
Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 01/07/26 10:18 AM.
There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
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I'll look at this more tomorrow buddy, but for now, there seems to be an awful lot of easy rhymes for no reason except to rhyme. Sometimes you should just write out the story you want to tell without even thinking about lyrics at all. Say a note to your grand-child, what would you say?
That's how you get lines that don't sound forced. Make sense?
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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Joined: Jan 2017
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I think Epictetus might be hard to sing.. LOL You are way too picky. "Don't get wrapped up in things that can be taken away" might emerge in some form as a lyrical line. I looked him up . wrote a chorus , you can write the verses Epictetus whispered low and true Control what’s yours, let the rest pass through I ain’t king of the things I can’t predict But I rule my soul Epictetus You and Kay-lynn , can head over there .https://www.thesongwritersforum.com/vanilla/categories/songs-for-review
Last edited by bennash; 01/07/26 11:50 PM.
We’re all built from the same dust and dreams,
Different roads, but the same means.
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 12,139 Likes: 51
Top 10 Poster
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Top 10 Poster
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 12,139 Likes: 51 |
there's dreams and bigger dreams
then there's dreams that love you back
never settle for an answer
if you never got to ask
all you can control
is the way that you react
only make your memories
with thosw who love you back
If writing ever becomes work I think I'm going to have to stop
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"I have dreamed a lot of things that have come true for other people, because I didn't take the action to make them come true for me." –Brian Austin Whitney
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