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People, places, dreams and new faces, good times, sad times, memories and lies uncontested
Always searching, looking for that feeling, big city life, time and miles wasted
Looking for that... feeling, seems that I'm dreaming
Where's that simple life and that pot of gold
Where's my rainbow

What do we expect from life, money love or an easy way out
How do we know know what's wrong or right, who told you what life was about
Oh, I wonder...
Giving taking mending and breaking, nothing you can do in this life lasts forever
Growing changing, things rearranging, looking for that place where they say that they've got it made
Oh that feeling, seems that I'm dreaming
Where's that simple life and that pot of gold
Where's my rainbow

Why do we laugh, why do we dream, why do we fight or hold a grudge
Why do we question authority, who gave us the right to judge
Oh, I wonder...
People places dreams and new faces, lost souls longing for all that may never be there
Love and compassion, a timeless fashion, shared with another so we may discover that place we're all dreaming of
Looking for that feeling
That simple life, that pot of gold
That rainbow

When I'm so old that I can't stand up, I bet I'll know when I'm dying
When I was young I wished I had the wings of a dove
But do the birds even know they're flying...
Oh, I wonder...

Lovely summation Tony.
Your entire theme in a short elegant paragraph.

Marty

Ok

I will listen to the song later...but the lyric gets a AAAA++++ rating without hearing a word

Steve

Thanks Guys!

I like your style Tony, love the guitar in this one

Sorry Tony
I put a reply to Chester in the wrong place.

Ha!
They say "the mind is the first to go, Marty..."

Thanks James

This is great tune with a great vocal. That acoustic part couldn't have been easy to do. The mid 8 section is really cool with the bass sitting well in the mix.

Cool!!

Ha! Thanks for that
Yeah', the finger-picking was the most difficult part...

Tony, i dont do critiques much any more (nobody cares) but I think I should offer you some tidbits on how to make this better.

Love the guitar, and i LOVE the first line of the first verse. Your melody doesnt match in the rest of it. follow the same meter. Your pitch is off in a few areas...

It's a long winded line, the first one, so what id consider is singing your one line, and then hooking it with the rainbow part right after it. Its not too soon, and it gives the busy verse melody a breather and stands out. I know, cause i just wrote a song in a similar structure. Four lines, is too boring there. Thats where knowing your song forms helps. this should be a AABA song structure. Maybe use some of the other bits as a bridge.

but i see this: get that hook in there more often, love the wide open feel of it signifying a rainbow, very clever. and i LOVE your final stanza, that's a great line and payoff. dont waste the good stuff on a wreck, and i mean that with good intent.

People, places, dreams and new faces, good times, sad times, memories and lies uncontested
Where's my rainbow?
Always searching, looking for that feeling, big city life, time and miles wasted
Where's my rainbow?

Rest follow suit

Hmmmmm....
You obviously have something in mind, Dom...

You should SHOW us!

I'll even send you my trax...

but the structure would have to be changed. Just calling it as i hear it, this might be your best one yet. and im still ironing out my sound.


This reminds me of Van Morrison into the mystic or something

notice the structure i mentioned...

V We were born before the wind
Also, younger than the sun
'Ere the bonnie boat was won
As we sailed into the mystic

V Hark now, hear the sailors cry
Smell the sea and feel the sky
Let your soul and spirit fly
Into the mystic

B Yeah, when that fog horn blows
I will be coming home
Yeah, when that fog horn blows
I wanna hear it
I don't have to fear it

We're all songwriter/musicians here, Dom... Quit trying to be such a technical "perfectionist" lol. Just "rough it" one time through... so we can hear where your head's at

Were all songwriters/musicians, but some of us want to work at it. Others think whatever they create is perfect as is. Ive never written a perfect song, and if i have, i didnt know it was perfect and changed things anyway.

You just want to collab, to u it's like hanging out and having a beer.

I just want you to write a better song, and feel a sense of accomplishment.

I think a fun song with lots of room for jamming and improv, would be a fun collab. Not this song.

But im not ready to post my stuff. Soon though

You make me feel all "Warm-n-Fuzzy", thanks Dom
CHICKEN! Cluck Cluck... Lol

Your songs are really raw. They can be really goof with some work.

Doesnt mean I can do that for you, it just means, there's better songs in there if u wanted to work on it.

Doesnt sound like you do, which is cool. Dont know why you need me to coloborate with, you ho hum my input anyway.

If its fun to for you how you are doing it, then keep doing it, not many people are listening anyway.

Seriously?

You're going to pass on an opportunity to re-do one of my songs, and make it better? After all the antagonizing between us?

"Come On Man..."

I could make this better, but its not my song, and not really enjoyable to try and do it. Im trying to inspire YOU.

It's probably not going to change the Earth's orbit either way.

Sounds like your having fun which is probably the most important thing, after all.

Fine...

I'm goin' fishin'!

Did you catch anything, Tony? Love the arrangement and performance. As usual, you get a great sound and there's so much going on to hold the interest. I get what Dom is saying about the structure. It is a bit chaotic. The question becomes, does it matter? I actually like that about it, probably because it's executed so confidently.

I sometimes wish you would hold a note at the end of a line instead of kind of tailing off on the last syllable. It makes you seem like you're not sure it's the right note lol.

Just a "throwback" catfish lol...

You need to quit accusing me of singing

I didn't accuse you of singing well lol.

....but I could, of course.

Good song man . all works , Yup the mind is the first to go I guess

Hey Tony ...how are you?
so this one...

your music and singing is always very listenable.
The Start of the song reminded me of the Youngbloods "Get Together"
So inspired by that, I did a cheap rewrit...heehee


People, places, dreams and new faces, good times, sad times, memories and lies uncontested
Always searching, looking for that feeling, big city life, time and miles wasted
Looking for that... feeling, seems that I'm dreaming
Where's that simple life and that pot of gold
Where's my rainbow

Did you catch anything, Tony
Just a throwback catfish


Giving taking mending and breaking, nothing you can do in this life lasts forever
Growing changing, things rearranging, looking for that place where they say that they've got it made
Oh that feeling, seems that I'm dreaming
Where's that simple life and that pot of gold
Where's my rainbow

Did you catch anything, Tony
Just a throwback catfish


People places dreams and new faces, lost souls longing for all that may never be there
Love and compassion, a timeless fashion, shared with another so we may discover that place we're all dreaming of
Looking for that feeling
That simple life, that pot of gold
That rainbow

When I'm so old that I can't stand up
I'll sleep well and dream of my catfish throw back days.