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Bayside
by Gary E. Andrews - 10/19/26 09:48 PM
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,357
Top 20 Poster
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Top 20 Poster
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,357 |
Wow bama. This is great! You captured all the grit necessary for a blues song...and the story kept my eyes glued to it. I do have one small nitpick...these two lines: "Sheriff's workin' overtime/
Most wanted man in seven states"...make it sound like the sheriff is wanted in seven states...if you read it literally (though I knew what you were saying, of course). I'd suggest "I'm wanted in six southern states" or something similar. It's just a nitpick and no one else caught it, so it may just be me being picky. I loved the lyric, anyhow. The first four lines are awesome and set a great tone for the song. Good writing!
Corey
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