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Lot Long
by Gary E. Andrews - 11/10/26 11:20 AM
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Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,419 Likes: 4
Top 200 Poster
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Top 200 Poster
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,419 Likes: 4 |
John,
Some nice lines here. I might be inclined to shorten the 3rd and 4th line of the chorus to match the number of syllables in the first two lines--though really depends on the melody you have in mind. And depending on the tempo, you may want to consider adding a bridge . . . though, again, always tough to say without a melody behind it.
But as it stands, a really strong start lyrically.
All my best,
Deej
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