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Lot Long
by Gary E. Andrews - 11/10/26 11:20 AM
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Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,419 Likes: 4
Top 200 Poster
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Top 200 Poster
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,419 Likes: 4 |
Owen,
I like the sound of this one—cool harmony on the chorus on “moving down the line”; it jumps out at you.
Vic has an interesting idea about revisiting the last verse, but I’m not sure it should be about redemption. Maybe, though, about looking more ahead; that is, rather than looking back, looking forward to the next town, perhaps with some hope of things being better (though he knows he’s somewhat kidding himself). Not sure that makes sense, but just an add on to Vic’s suggestion.
But this is just fine as is—a cool, dark mellow. (BTW, nice add on the train whistle at the end—sweet)!
All the best,
Deej
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