JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback MP3 Feedback Forum Fire On The Sand

This is an old one and well past it's sell by date but I always
wanted to give it another go, I wrote the lyric after watching
news footage of troops walking past flaming oil wells in the
desert, I thought that's got to be surreal situation to be in, the
first time out it was all screaming guitars and the
general consensus was that it was too busy, so this time
I've gone totally the other direction and striped it back
almost to the bone, foolishly I erased version one so
can't compare the two but any comments of any kind
on this would be gratefully received, thanks,

Tony.

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=5710096

Title
Fire on the sand

Verse 1
It’s a strange place to be
On a beach without a sea
Thought hell was just a dream
But I can feel its heat
The wellheads weep
RPGs scream
I know what that means

Chorus
Tank tracks roll leaving
Scars across the land
Tap your hat with
The clip in your hand
The sky’s ablaze
Raining fire on the sand
It’s raining fire on the sand

Verse 2
Left home at eighteen
Private no first name
They call me green
Won’t go back the same
Because of what I’ve seen
I hear distant screams
I know what that means

Repeat Chorus

Verse 3
See fire all day
If night comes I’ll pray
Take this war away
Lift this curse
Where flame drops burst
And everybody screams
I know what that means

Repeat Chorus

Outro
Its raining fire on the sand
Raining fire on the sand
Raining fire on the sand


Words/Music by Tony Atkinson © copyright

Hi Tony

well I like the piano and effects --- I guess if it were mine -- I'd add more vocal build behind the chorus with ooohs then ahhhs culminating and growing as it goes.....

jm

Hey Tony,
I was trying to imagine what the other version would have sounded like but I think you've got the perfect sound here. I like the voice driven arrangement. The somber piano with the deep voice gives the song just the right gravitas for the subject matter in my opinion. I lean heavily to the dark side and minor keys so I enjoyed this very much.

Well, I've never been there but the song put me there - Has a nice atmospheric sound that supports the imagery in the lyric. Nice work on this, Tony - was surprised to hear it start off with keys rather than guitar and it worked!

Scott

It worked well for me also Tony ... I enjoyed this song a lot. Moody and driven. very cool

Dan

Hey Joice, maybe more backing vocals could work, no harm in
trying it out, thanks for you input,

Tony.

Hey Kim, I had the subject matter very much in mind when I
was recording this and I believed it had to be somber, the
fact you agree takes a weight off, appreciate your comments,

Tony.

Scott, those particular images were both stunning and terifying
I tried to put myself in the shoes of someone who was there
and describe it from their point of view, I went with keys
as opposed to guitars only because I had used them in the
first demo, thanks for giving it a spin and commenting,

Ton.

Dan, I'm glad you enjoyed it and appreciate your comments
very much,

tony.

Very good lyrics. Love the chorus, very moving...maybe as Joice suggested, some background vocals to add more somberness to it, but this is good.

Good luck--
Kimberly

Kimberly, thanks for giving this a spin, appreciate your
kind comments.

Tony.

I think it reads pretty well and the musical treatment complements it just fine.

Kevin

What an interesting song, Tony. The lyric is simple but vivid, right from the first lines:
It’s a strange place to be
On a beach without a sea

I think your vocals and musical treatment suit the theme well.

Donna

Kevin, thanks for dropping by to listen and comment, appreciate
it,

Tony.

Donna, It's interesting and was something different to do, I
don't think I can do much more with it, yours and the other
comments here seem to suggest that, so I think I call this
one done, appreciate your comments very much,

Tony.

Hi Tony,

Fire on the Sand. What an eerie and horrifying image! Your music and vocal supports that feeling very well. I visualize a scene from a war movie, an aerial sequence with no sound except for the music droning in the background, maybe a helicopter view of exploding bombs, etc. With that title in mind, that's what I was seeing. How awful! But in a good way, of course!

Ricki