JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback MP3 Feedback Forum Down in old Mexico

Ok...been playing and recording not yet a year. This is a country song. I know the production is not all that but it is the first time I put together a bass player, a drummer, harmonies, and me singing and playing guitar.Lot of work. Some people like it, some say the lyrics aren't that good. Lead guitar part kinda cheesey. Please tell me your thoughts on the following...thanks in advance

1)Production
2)Vocals
3)Lyrics

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=7227627

Down in Old Mexico

(verse)

Now there's a lot of things I've done
But I'm innocent of this one
You say I have it coming… this time
In another time and place
You say I cheated on your sugar and lace
That was so long ago
Down in Old Mexico

(Verse)
Your calling me back to Texas
To answer for my offenses
And soon I’ll be coming back… to explain
If you'll let me set things right
We’ll buy that dress of white
You wanted so long ago
Down in Old Mexico


(bridge)

I’m coming in on the train
Your looking at me to place blame
A case of mistaken idenity
Don't throw away all our plans
It was another man

Short break ……

(Verse)
I’ve been a loser and a winner
Made it through some tough long winters
Your just not seeing it …my way
It wasn’t me in Matzalan…
You saw with your sister Dawn
So very long ago
Down in old Mexico

Repeat bridge

Only playing and recording for a year???? Dang, you've come a long way in a short time. It doesn't matter what folks say about it, this is quite impressive given your short playing time.

Kevin

Nice song. It works well. I like the lilt. Good phrasing. Nice tone to the vocals. Good lyrics that paint a good picture. Well done.

Tom

Kevin...thanks, it is nice to hear someone say they liked it. I appreciate that. Of course I know it is not all that but not bad either. Thanks again.

Tom,Thankyou. Glad you thought it worked well and that the vocals had a nice tone. Singing is one of those things that is hard for the singer to know if it is acceptable. All I want from the vocal is to not stink. Vocals really can bring a song down from pretty good to pretty bad. Thanks for the compliments.

It's such a pleasant listen, Ted..... Sounds to me like you've been writing a lot longer than a year.... It has a familiar..take me back a bit feel to it.... and the lyrics were set up nicely.

this is a very strong line...
You say I cheated on your sugar and lace

if i were to nit it at all...I paused in the bridge between the 3rd and 4th line on the melody connection there..I'm not sure why.. so...that really isn't a nit.... I better go back and check my own posts...because I'm in a typo finding frame of mind I guess.... ...just check the you're (s) and ... identity ..
Now..to check my own spellin'

best to you Ted... That is an adorable aussie pup...a little girl?....or guy....

best...
Kaley

Hi Kaley...I started writing first and had some pro demos done. I wanted to see if I could write something and actually have it make sense when put to music. That got expensive so I tried singing the melody acapella. Derick heard one of those and said "why don't you take up guitar". That was about a year ago I think in march of 2008. So,I did.

Thanks for the nice comments. It is truly appreciated.

Freedom is a boy. 15 months old now. Best dog ever!

Ted: I hope a few other non-musician writers see and hear this -- and maybe it will inspire them to give it a try also. I've always believed that given 15 minutes a day, folks could get fairly proficient on guitar and/or piano in a year or so. Next year isn't that far away, either!

Kevin

Hey thanks Kevin...it means a lot that you think I'm progressing and that it isn't to bad...I keep seeing how far I have to go with playing but then again it might be one of those things where I will never be a great player but at least get some songs across for the family to hear once I'm gone...thanks again...appreciate it

Hi Ted,

I'd pronounce "offenses" correctly, it's close enough to "Texas" to not screw with its pronunciation.

This is a weird but enjoyable arrangement--it reminds me ALOT of Dan Hicks and His Hot Licks...a folk/country swing band popular in the 60s and 70s (you've probably heard "I Scare Myself")

I love it, it's a little sloppy in places, and the guitar solo in the wrong key will lose it's charm after listening a few times, but keep the girl

The lyrics a little offbeat; matches the music well, had me wondering how he could cheat on her sugar and lace...

--Mike

Hi Mike...thanks for commenting...I wondered when someone would call me on the "Offenses" pronounciation...just having fun...

not a tradtional arrangement...AABAB is close enough I suppose...

as for the lead part I have no idea how to play lead or how to get it in the right key...that was my very first and only lead guitar part ever...I'm sure your right about the key...I know it is cheesey but heck a real player wasn't available so I got the job!...Thanks again neighbor to the South