JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback Lyric Feedback Forum 3 Song writing Challenge

Hey, Derek

Whens the next challenge, and I just also want you to know, please don't think I was making fun of your lyrics, cause I just love your work. You are fantastic.


Michele
Your Aussie friend from Australia

Derek,

when you posted this challenge, the first thing that came to mind was a wonderful lyric written a long time ago (2001)by a member of the JPF forum. As you probably know it is nearly impossible to search anything on this forum older than a year so I thought it was lost forever but this morning I was on a different workstation here at work and I found a bookmark link to the lyric. This is a perfect match for this challenge. Here is the link.

http://www.justplainfolks.org/ubb/Forum1/HTML/000063.html

TOO YOUNG

She always looked
So pretty in pink
I heard from her friends
She’d started to drink
She was only fifteen
Too young to drink

She always looked
So cool in green
She looked like the girls
In those teen magazines
She was only fifteen
When she tried nicotine

She used to look
So lovely in red
But she started to look
Like she’d never been fed
Then the white powder
Messed up her head

Too young to drink
Too young to smoke
Too young to resist
Too young to cope

She would have looked
Stunning in white
She would have made
A beautiful bride
She was only fifteen
Too young to die

(Bridge?)
What they found
Doesn’t make any sense
Too young to realise
It’s so permanent
She was too young to die
Too young to die…..

She was only fifteen
Too young to die

Copyright
Judy Hollier
29th December 2000




PS is your sister on this forum. BB?

Nothing Rhymes With Purple

V1
My girl's favorite color's purple
so I wanted to give her a song
use her signature color
so she'd love to sing along

(chorus)
But nothing rhymes with purple
I don't know what to do
why couldn't she love blue
then I'd have more rhymes to choose
but nothing rhymes with purple

V2
I stayed up all night rackin' my brain
searched all over the Internet
and wouldn't you just know it
no perfect rhymes, you bet

(chorus)
But nothing rhymes with purple
I don't know what to do
why couldn't she love blue
then I'd have more rhymes to choose
but nothing rhymes with purple

(bridge)
I let her hear what I had so far
and she said why are you in such a ripple
you could have just used girl
to rhyme with purple

Just off the top of my head:

Knights in White Satin
Painted Black
Black Magic Woman
Devil With The Blue Dress On
Green, Green Grass of Home
Blue Eyes Cryin' (In The Rain)
White Christmas
I'll Have a Blue Christmas (Without You)
Brown Sugar


"Grey Smoke" (c) 2007 by Dave Gill

Grey, grey, grey
The smoke that billows past
my window
pane, pane, pane
I hear the wheels a churnin'
My heart's been always yearnin'
Since you've been gone
my home is not the
same, same, same
So little train keep blowin' that
grey smoke...

Grey, grey, grey
The city lights are
beckoning my
name, name, name
I hear the nightlife callin'
This country boy ain't fallin'
I won't be suckered by
no pretty
dame, dame, dame
Little train keep blowin' that
grey smoke...

*WHOO - WHOO!!*
The whistle is announcing
that I'm
on - my - way

*WHOO - WHOO!!*
The cloudy skies
are makin' room for
sun-ny days

Soon I'll be there walkin'
down the street
Wavin' 'Hi' to everyone
I meet
Thoughts of you
will soon be through and
miles away
No time to be delayed

Grey, grey, grey
The smoke that billows past
my window
pane, pane, pane
I hear the wheels a churnin'
My heart's been always yearnin'
Since you've been gone
my home is not the
same, same, same
So little train keep blowin' that
grey smoke...

Hi All,

I haven't had a lot of time this week to respond to all these great lyrics, or to write a new one of my own. I hope you don't mind me putting my favorite one about color, or lack of it. Here's a link to the demo:

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_songInfo.cfm?bandID=576195&songID=4674996

Livin’ Without Color

I saw the first leaf of the fall
And breathed a heavy sigh
It served as a reminder
Of when we said goodbye
We used to love the colors
In forest and on hill
If you were here beside me
I know I’d love ‘em still

I’m livin’ without color
I see just white and black-------------------{Chorus
And now and then a touch of gray
I want my darlin’ back

I saw you through the boyfriends
Right into senior high
Then surprise mixed with wonder
When envy filled my eye
Was just like in the movies
Best friends from early days
The day you said you loved me
You took my breath away

I’m livin’ without color
I see just white and black-------------------{Chorus
And now and then a touch of gray
I want my darlin’ back

You never meant to leave me
A drunkard took my wife
The night he took his keys in hand
And stole away your life

I don’t have a broken heart
You filled in to the top
When it comes to lovin’ you
I know I’ll never stop

I’m livin’ without color
I see just white and black------------------{Chorus
And now and then a touch of gray
I want my darlin’ back

{Instr. Break

I felt a touch on shoulder
A whisper in my ear
You said enjoy the colors
I’m here with you my dear

You said enjoy the colors
I’m here with you my dear

Copyright 2005 John W. Selleck

Chartreuse
(c) Kevin Emmrich 2008

(verse) I just can't figure you out
You never seem to play it safe
You say you want to stick around
but then you're gone without a trace

You stumble when the ground is flat
but you can scale a vertical cliff
You say you leave your traces everywhere
but all I get is a vanishing whiff

(chorus) Chartreuse, you're so obtuse
you do your best to confound and confuse
I think you are just trying to drive me mad

Chartreuse, please cut me loose
or at least we can call it a truce
I think you are going to make me sad

(verse) I think you are halfway there
But you can't choose which way you prefer
At times you seem so down to earth
but then you bath in a french liqueur

Gold or grass, green or yellow
you leave me grasping at straws
I wish that this fiasco would end
or at least have some kind of pause

(chorus) Chartreuse, you're so obtuse
you do your best to confound and confuse
I think you are just trying to drive me mad

Chartreuse, please cut me loose
or at least we can call it a truce
I think you are going to make me sad


**************************************************
From http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chartreuse_yellow

Chartreuse is a color halfway between green and yellow that was named because of its resemblance to the green color of one of the French liqueurs called green chartreuse, introduced in 1764; whereas chartreuse (the traditional color) is a yellow color mixed with a small amount of green that was named because of its resemblance to the yellow color of one of the French liqueurs called yellow chartreuse, introduced in 1838.

The web color chartreuse is the color precisely halfway between green and yellow, so it is 50% green and 50% yellow.

A Crayola crayon named Chartreuse was created in 1972, but it was the incorrect color, a red-orange shade. It was renamed Atomic Tangerine in 1990 (See the List of Crayola crayon colors).

The complementary (opposite) color of (the web color) chartreuse on the HSV color wheel is violet. Chartreuse is the most visible color to the human eye.

Hi you all,

Brenda, Dave, John, & Kevin Wow!

Fantastic efforts by all, what an exciting post, and lots of fun, and John your song, Livin without color, what a beautiful song. I really enjoyed listening to it, and loved it.
Thanks to all of you for joining in, it has been a great read. I have enjoyed all of your posts. Too many to make individual posts.

Nearly forgot about you Samuel, thanks for the info, I haven't checked it out yet, but I will later tonight.

Thanks a bunch

Michele
Aussie girl from down under