JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback Lyric Feedback Forum 3 "A Series of Random Events" -- Alternate Versioin--WAY DOWN!

Hey Pete,

First off, responded to your PM....

Secondly, no sweat about thinking it was written by a gal (Hello, BETH here !) but I thought I had some language that cleared that up....I haven't looked back at it in a while.

I think you'll see that Stan had some interesting additions for my consideration. Don't know how that would affect our private discussion (oooooh, everyone is so curious I bet, LOL!).

As for working w/o a melody, yup, that's the way I do it. I basically come up with a story, and pathetic as it seems, it ends up being driven by my obsession with clever rhyming. Of course, I end up being backed into a corner b/c of this unconventional approach, but I've had fun with it so far...

Unless specifically asked, I wouldn't even be able to tell you what kind of music might accompany a given piece. Though with so much storytelling going on, it always seems in my mind to fall into the "country-ish" mode. That isn't to say I wouldn't consider two different musical approaches to this song, though....

BTW, my last song was embedded in the song challenge: "The Price of Ice Cream". A long true-ish story that was very hard to address with so few words....

Ciao for now, and thanks for visiting,
Beth

Hey Beth!

I finally got a chance to read your alternate version! To me, it seems like a whole different song in itself! Maybe you could work with it as a "Morning After" type song. Hmm - possible title Sunday Morning After?

I do like it!

Charlann

Hey Charlann!

Thanks for taking the time to revisit...

Now just want to make sure you're talking about the FIRST RE-WRITE, not the second, right? The latter was a futile attempt to make some of the language a bit less stylized, but it didn't work.

As for the morning after angle, I like it...but I'm not sure it applies here, since I was trying to create a scenario where the two had been together for a while, not just one night --hence his concern about "love borne of calculation", and her references to "I'm yours and your mine"....

But the concept is interesting, and I'm enjoying all the different spins people are putting on this song....from the morning after, to thinking it's from a woman's POV, etc. If I were ever to come up with a re-make, maybe I could combine the two....THEN I think I might be getting into Stan's territory!

Again, thanks for stopping by!

Sooner or later,
Beth