JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback Lyric Feedback Forum 3 Free Hooks! (Help yourself.)

Below are approximately 70 hook/titles I have lying around waiting to be written by someone. Maybe one of these will stir something for you. Help yourself to what works, leave the rest.

Skip


Hook Heaven

When Billy’s Up to Bat
God is Up to Something Good
Going Postal
Living Steel
Last Saint in Sin City
Night Train
Black Rose
Chick Flick
Memorize Her Perfume
I Dream of Tigers

A Pocket Full of Stars
The Girl on the Other Guy’s Arm
(How I Miss) Who I Used to Be
Hard to Remember, Impossible to Forget
Show Me in the Bible
Stone Flower
Whisper My Name
Atheist’s Prayer
Hard Candy
The Corpse Looked Familiar

Life in High Heels
Beautiful Baptist Babes
Sisterchicks
Bringing Up Boys
Only Angels Can Wing It
God’s Leading Lady
The Last True Cowboy
Winterwood
Lady Yesterday
Roses are Dead
(Violets are Too)

Jimmy’s Girl
Five Smooth Stones
Finding Faith
The River Why
Dandelions in a Jelly Jar
Dr. Death
Desperate Dreams
Slightly Pregnant
Once Upon a Summer
Kiss Me While I Sleep
Water Melon for Breakfast

Gone Too Far
A Long Line of Dead Men
(I’m Related to…)
Then You Came Along
A Purple Thread for Sky
In the Electric Mist With the Confederate Dead
Singing in the Comeback Choir
The Wealthy Widows’ Club
Bride to the King
Where I’m Calling From
Trolling for Sharley (Sharley's our McCall, Idaho rendition of the Loch Ness Monster. This refers to skiing on the lake where our church summer camp is located.)

Milk Glass Moon
Live From Golgotha
Lovely Bones
The Last Camel Died at Noon
Woman Without a Past
Masterpiece of Murder
Unless You Die Young
Breakfast in Bed
The Christmas Cat
Who Pissed in Your Cheerios? (from my neice’s friend’s comment to an overbearing teacher)

Lady Boss
Love Storm
Quite a Year for Plums
Bloodlines
Kill the Dinosaurs Before They Hatch
Quickie
Overloaded Ark
Where Eagles Die
Birdmobile (snitched this one from a Stan post)
Lookers Welcome(Men Too)
Come Get Me

Save Me From Myself
A Time for Heroes
Within the Nuclear Plant Kill Zone
Naked Space Cowgirl's (Giddy Girl's daughter's contribution to this growing list...)

P.S. I'll also post below a piece recently appearing under a lyric concerning how I go about looking for hooks. I'd like to hear where some of the rest of you find them. Please talk back to me about this...


Finding Hooks

Fresh hook/titles are a lyricist's first order of business. Not that you can't use one someone else has already used, but because your hook/title's aptness and distinctiveness is hugely important to your song getting noticed among the jillions others are also writing. I'm always on the lookout for new hooks and titles that catch my eye or ear and create an emotional response of some kind in me--regardless of what that emotional response is.

Places to intentionally "mine" unused, or little used hook/titles:

1. CONVERSATIONS. My wife Judi's got a fine way with words and reads widely. I've gotten many good hook/titles from simply listening to her speech patterns. A couple examples of her phrases that became lyrics that come to mind include: "You Make Me Laugh", "Do You Want My Cherry?" and "Dr. Kevorkian's Flying Machine". Last summer I got "Preacher Stew" from a phrase of a woman who had grown up in a church I had once pastored where the folks had a three-generation habit of being particularly nasty to their pastors. She was sympathizing with me for having spent four years among them. They'd been so difficult previous to my arriving that our denominational leadership had simply not sent them any pastor at all for the previous five years. The local leader asked for my resignation within a year of my arrival. I declined to accomodate. Well written movie script conversations can also be a good source of song hooks.

2. TITLES OF BOOKS AND NOVELS. These folks are also creative word weavers, and their titles are as crucial to someone reading their stuff as our hook/titles are to someone listening to our stuff. I've spent many an afternoon simply walking the aisles of libraries and used book stores with a pad and a pencil brousing for hook/titles, some of which I later wrote into lyrics. It is plain those writers of prose sometimes borrow their titles from existing songs, so this cross pollination between the two writing disciplines doesn't all go one way. A few of the many titles I've taken, or altered, from book titles include: "Mom's Marijuana", "Mama's Been to Sorrow's Kitchen (And She's Licked Out All the Pans)", "No Ordinary Man", "That Nurse on the Night Shift", "Dracula's Dentures" and "A Pirate of Her Own".

3. BUSINESS NAMES AND NAMES OF BOATS. People tend to consider carefully and creatively what they will call their own business (whether on land or sea). I've gotten some great titles for lyrics from business names, and have spent time walking boat harbors with pen and pad simply to jot down the clever names people give their ocean craft. Some hook/titles from business sources that later became lyrics include: "Bubble's Bikini" (from a bikini shop on Maui), "Miss Lucille's Gossip Parlor" (a business name down along the Gulf where Katrina hit) and "She Was Eaten by the Escalator (At the Bon Marche)". One I've got my eye on currently is from a new mailing supply and shipping venture in the next town down. They call it "Going Postal".

4. THE WORDS OF THE BIBLE AND OTHER WELL WRITTEN LITERATURE. The Bible is probably my best source for hook/titles, way of viewing the world, and plot twists. Curiously, a great deal of what would ordinarily be considered to be purely non-religious lyrics that I write have their hidden roots in its pages. Some hook/titles and ideas for lyrics from the Good Book include: "You are an Eagle", "Fishing for Leviathan", "I Choose You", "Bubble's Bikini" (I got the hook/title from the business sign in Maui, but the content about the brevity of beauty is directly from the final words of the book of Proverbs in the Bible). Other well-written literature is also a source of lyric ideas. I got "Cowboys Are My Weakness" from a lady writer's comment in a book up in Cambridge, Idaho. I'd written the lyric to match before I got home that weekend.

5. LOCAL CULTURE AND SLANG. There's an incredible variety of marvelous phrases and ideas woven into the local culture of about any community one would wish to explore world wide. I began intentionally exploring local cultures during our five years in the international cultural mixing center of Hawaii, and have kept at it following our return to what they call "The Mainland"--here in the 48 states. Some hooks that have arisen from this include: "Strawberry Moon" from the festival by this name near where my parents live along the Mississippi in Missouri--referring to the first full moon in June when the strawberries come ripe; "I Think Chinese Food is Great" after a visit to the Chinatown live critters meat market in San Francisco; "Gospel Seed" from the seed-growing region of Idaho where I currently live; "Moon Dust" from the phrase used by my Samoan neighbors in Hawaii to refer to the bits of glowing organtic matter that washes up on the dark sands, and is supposed to mark the place where ancient lovers once lay. "Man Killer" came from the club scene colliding with Proverbs 5 and 7 one evening in Santa Rosa, California when I was invited to hear a local band by a guy I don't think realized was a pastor in disguise. (I wrote that lyric on the back of a napkin while dancing that ranged somewhere between dirty dancing and public foreplay happened all around me.)

Some other great places to seek original hook/titles include:

6. PLACE NAMES AND HISTORICAL AND CURRENT EVENTS. "When Two Brothers are Soldiers", "Deep South", "Lady San Francisco", "Orchard", "Mardi Gras", "My Heart is in Hawaii", "Island Dreaming", etc.

7. NEWSPAPERS AND MAGAZINES. "She's Dancing on the Top of the Bar" and "She Wants to Sell My Body on the Internet" (from check out counter newspaper rags, they've got to sell magazines, and what catches a customer's eye can catch a listener's ear); and "Silently He Paints the Sky" (a description of a gorgeous sunset scene on the cover of a magazine).

8. OTHER LYRICISTS. This is a tricky one, since you don't wish to snatch their creative work and claim it as your own. But another writer may say a thing that sparks something similar, but somewhat different in your own thinking process. A line from a verse, twisted in your unique direction, may result in an entirely new hook/title with no obvious connection to its source. While hook/titles cannot be copyrighted, using one that's been used many times before lessens your chances for having your lyric stand out in the pack much. You'll know you've done this right if you can post your own lyric on the same page here at JPK as the hook/title you borrowed from and not even the author is aware of what you've done. "Harbor of Her Heart" was one such altered snitching that turned into a lyric for me. It employs alliteration with those three H's, which can also make your hook/lyric stand out if used with care. My basic rule is to always improve on anything I borrow. If I can't do that, I leave it alone.

9. JUST ABOUT ANYPLACE. The old miners used to say, "Gold is where you find it." Song hook/titles can be waiting to be noticed just about anywhere as well.

Since your hook/title is the seed from which your lyric will be written, the search for such seeds, the intentional collecting of them, and their careful use in writing are absolutely crucial to the craft of lyric writing. Personally, I've had multiple "Hook Heaven" notebooks and folders on my computers down through the years for the sole purpose of gathering this kind of raw material for writing.

If I go back to teaching lyric writing again at some point in the future, each student coming up with three or four good, original hooks each week in their own notebooks would be a required assignment. I'd up it to a hook a day once they got going.

What are some favorite hooks you've come across and written into a song? Where did you find them? Did you alter what you found in any way in the process of using it?

------------------------

Joe's suggestions for hook hunting locations...

A. Generally keeping your eyes and ears open all the time.

B. Bumper Stickers

C. Getting friends and family to feed you hooks and interesting and unusual storylines that might become songs.

D. Web site names, URL's, ect. (I think the "Within the Nuclear Plant Kill Zone" I saw by one person's post here at JPF has possibilities...)



[This message has been edited by Skip Johnson (edited 11-07-2005).]

Hey, Skipper, Lemmie take ya UP on a Fewa These...

"Gone Postal" and "Birdmobile"
sound like Potential Winners...

They ALL sound like Potential Winners..tho those 2 I can well-relate to!

I see "Gone Postal" as Jus' PERFECT for a Parody of "Gone Country"..& now I gotta dig up the Original Lyrics..(This Sounds Like WORK..dern it..& I wuz jus' gonna TRY to RE-LAX a Spell..& snip out CD Covers ad nauseum!)

"Birdmobile" I guess I kinda Owes to the Ol' Henpecked-Previa sittin' dejectedly out fronta the New Digs...about to be stripped of its Tag..& set to rest behind the Clock Shop..whilst I prepare to Sue the Insurers of the Drunk Who Nailled It.

It's certainly a Car-With-Character..far beyond My Own...and deserves a Wee Bit of Immortalizin'!

That ONE Hook had me thinkin'..Macabre Thoughts:

My "Roses are Dead"
My "Violets are too"
I'm ALL OUTTA Flowers
NOW I'm Killin' YOU! ;-)>

(Free Entire CHORUS now, to Anybody Macabre-Enuf..OK?)

Thanks for alla those Real Kind Hooks-Offered, Ol' Buddy...& I'll try to be Worthy of My Pair-Acquired, Eh?

Big Thankful Guy-Hugs,
Stan

my favorite... the one that "hooked" me most is "Live From Golgotha" but I'm not gonna write anything for it... I'm not worthy... haha... but yeah... lots of interesting titles here.

------------------
"I rock, therefore I am."

Thanks, Skip. Lot of good stuff in here. Y'do never know.

I'd add one more to your list of Places Hooks Come From, besides the general advice to keep one's eyes and ears open. After people found out I wrote songs (and had heard some of 'em), they started to tell me about weird things they saw and heard, from a "Think there might be a song in that?" standpoint--and sometimes, there was.

Just a couple of examples, and then I'll be quiet:

"Can I Have Your Car When the Rapture Comes?" came off a bumpersticker--that somebody told me about.

I saw an Open Letter to President Bush that was just peppered with Bibical references, a lot of them talking about "abominations." So I stayed up one night reading parts of my Bible I'd never paid much attention to before. The result was "The Abomination Two-Step"--a sort of Tom Lehrer meets Leviticus.

And "Jim the Psychic Dog" I got from our county economic development director, who passed on the URL of Jim's Website, thinking there might be a song in it--dead dogs, y'know. And there was, and I give her credit on the CD.

Good to know you're in the minister business (and so close by, too). Makes me feel less weird about being referred to in the paper as "the singing city manager."

Joe
www.soundclick.com/bands/7/joewrabek_music.htm

Joe,

So you've got friends feeding you hooks and unusual story line situations? A whole crews of hook hunters. Wow! That's the best thing I've heard of yet.

Could you please post the "Abomination Two-Step"? Sounds interesting.

Bumper stickers should be a good place for hook hunting. Those sound bite bits of cleverness and insight. Kind of like "Proverbs for the 21st Century".

Think I'll add your hook hunting locations to the end of the post above...

Where is Girabaldi, Oregon? We spent a few weeks the past few summers over on the coast from Astoria on down to New Port. After the high, dry sage brush and grass in this particular part of Idaho--except where its irrigated by farmers or our local rivers--the green and cool is a relief.

Singing City Manager? Works for me. Being a pastor allows me to use a lot of my material with groups of all ages and in services. Thing is, I write stuff I can't sing to parishioners. That's one reason I value this site. I don't have to edit myself as closely to avoid giving offense.

Today I ended the service with a song I had written that matched the theme of the sermon. The sermon was about the change that happens in the life of a person who genuinely comes to faith in Jesus Christ. Even an atheist knows becoming a Christian is supposed to make you a kinder, more generous, more tolerant, more just, more ethical person. If fact, they get justifiably irritated when a person claims to be a Christian and that doesn't take place. It does take some time for anyone to grow into what declares them to be (perfect like God Himself) at the point where they accept the perfect Jesus' sinless life in place of their own faultly one. If fact, it takes a lifetime. The process is a long, "three steps forward one step back" process that can be discouraging to themselves and to others. Only thing that keeps me going sometimes is a promise God makes that goes, "He who began a good work in you will complete it until the day of His appearing."

Here's the lyric that matched that message:

Lord of Butterflies

You said you'd give me wings like yours,
But here I am still falling.
I'm just a caterpillar on the ground.
You said someday I'd soar so high--
But when I try, I'm falling.
O Lord of Butterflies, don't let me down.

Lord of Butterflies,
Hear my caterpillar cries.
See me climbing to the tree tops
To watch you flying by.
Lord of Butterflies,
I want to sail your sunlit skies.
O hear my prayer, Lord of Butterflies.

You said someday I'd sip the sweet
Of fragrant, dew-kissed flowers.
But here I am, dear Lord, still eating weeds.
There's a winged Spirit within me,
I can feel its restless power.
But its a prisoner that can't be freed.
(Chorus)

Someday I'll lay me down to sleep,
When my life is over--
And everything I am will pass away.
I'll dream of you then my Lord,
Dancing through the clover.
Then when I wake, I'll find I'm not the same.
(Chorus)

Tag-- Please give me wings, Lord of Butterflies.

c2005 Skip Johnson
All rights reserved.

You ever get to sing your stuff at office parties? Where do you find performance opportunities?

SJ

Skip:

First, I'm not in Garibaldi any more--well, not most of the time. My wife and daughter still are, and I get occasionally to visit them, and eat, and stuff. I'm currently city manager in Union, Oregon, 15 miles southeast of La Grande, which is more over your way--gotta go where the job is, and that is (as I tell folks) the current gig. Been here a year. Garibaldi is 9 miles north of Tillamook, on the Coast.

Are you sure you'd want "The Abomination Two-Step"? It is not, shall, we say, a particularly religious song, even though the subject matter was taken entirely out of the Bible. And it's fairly risque (couldn't avoid that, with a line like "Why don't I come over and abominate with you?"). I can count the number of people who have heard that song and liked it on the fingers of one hand and have three fingers left over. I never have recorded it (but always can, of course).

My favorite for a religious song (and proof, in my opinion, that it's possible to be religious without being serious) is "Bungee Jumpin' Jesus," which I've noticed even appeals to fundamentalists (who are mostly not known for having senses of humor). And the idea for that one came from Dawg, who'd tossed the line out in one of his casual conversations. When I told him that was a line that needed a song to go with it, he said, "So? Go write one." And I did.

Office parties? Occasionally--I had to sing "I'm Giving Mom a Dead Dog for Christmas" at last year's Christmas potluck, and they'll probably make me do it again (unless they'd rather hear "Santa's Fallen and He Can't Get Up"). I got into this year's City-County Insurance Services conference for free--even the hotel room paid--because they wanted me to be entertainment. And of course, when I go to official conferences and such, the guitar always travels with me. I don't expect to perform, but I'm always hoping for people to play with.

Mostly, though, I keep Musician Joe separate from work--it's just part of that private life I maintain everybody, even icons like me, is supposed to be able to have. I've got a choice of groups I can play with most every weekend, and occasionally get to do gigs (which are occasionally even paying gigs). The "singing city manager" thing came from taking second place in the Oregon State Fair's Talent Show this summer, which the newspaper in La Grande felt they had to put on the front page. I just tell people this is something I have to do to keep from going crazy at my day job. (They usually tell me it's not working.) I know another city manager who writes science-fiction novels. Same thing.

I have developed sort of a backup band (they persist in calling themselves "Joe's Band," though they are way better musicians than I am), and we've done a couple of performances--most recently, a benefit for Katrina survivors that raised a couple thousand dollars. They've agreed to play on the next CD.


Here's the lyrics to "The Abomination Tweo-Step":

[4/4, absurdly brightly–think Manic Tom Paxton]

THE ABOMINATION TWO-STEP
–J. Wrabek

[THE RAP: This song's subject matter comes straight out of the Bible–but it's the wrong part of the Bible. Y'know, there are whole sections of the Bible that deal with abominations? All sorts of things are abominations, some of ‘em really picky. The punishment for most of ‘em is death; sometimes they have to off your family, too, to keep you from breeding. I have figured out why the Bible says only 144,000 people are going to Heaven: the rest of us, unfortunately, have committed abominations and blown our chances. Now, that's sad news. I figured I could help it go down easier if it were in a form you could dance to. That's why this is called "The Abomination Two-Step." It's actually more like a polka, but I thought "Abomination Polka" sounded redundant...]

1.

If you've worn polyester pants, eaten chocolate-covered ants,
Buried your pet guinea pig and didn't wash your hands,
Those are all abominations, and I hate to break the news
But they've called the Inquisition and they're comin' after you.

If you ate oysters on the half-shell, that's an abomination, too,
And I hear they've got a special place in Hades just for you;
But what we did on Saturday is probably the worst
‘Cause the Bible says we really should have gotten married first.

CHORUS:

There's abominations ev'rywhere, the preacher told me so,
I heard it on the teevee, and on the radio–
We're damned before we're started, and there's nothing we can do,
So why don't I come over and abominate with you?

2.

If you stayed out all night drinkin', and then you went to church,
It's two abominations if you didn't change your shirt;
And if you've got poor eyesight, then salvation's been denied–
That's as bad as eatin' camel flesh and cheatin' on your wife.

Oh, the Bible's full of kinky things a fellow shouldn't see–
That's why they left the pictures out of Deuteronomy;
There's verses full of stuff you're not supposed to do alone,
And abominations double if you do it on the phone.

CHORUS:

There's abominations ev'rywhere, the preacher told me so,
I heard it on the teevee, and on the radio–
We're damned before we're started, and there's nothing we can do,
So why don't I come over and abominate with you?

LEAD BREAK (IF ANYBODY CAN PLAY LEAD)

BRIDGE (a bridge? Joe wrote a BRIDGE?):

If you see abominations, you don't have to call the cops,
Just round up all the neighbors, and start ‘em throwin' rocks;
And when you're punishing transgressions, better not forget your own,
We've all got abominations–so we better all get stoned.

CHORUS:

There's abominations ev'rywhere, the preacher told me so,
I heard it on the teevee, and on the radio–
We're damned before we're started, and there's nothing we can do,
So why don't I come over and abominate with you?

(C) 2004 J. Wrabek dba Outside Services Ltd. All the usual rights reserved just in case. No abominations were harmed in the writing of this song.

Joe


[This message has been edited by roxhythe (edited 11-05-2005).]

[This message has been edited by roxhythe (edited 11-05-2005).]

Joe,

Good thing about long posts like this one: nobody has to read them who doesn't want to.

Looks like you're quoting Leviticus, alright. Maybe a little Deuteronomy thrown in too. (I think you may have a few of your own contemporary adaption and conclusions tossed in for good measure! No objection on that from me. At least you are thinking, which is better than most achieve on these subjects.)

The rabbis counted a total of 613 laws in the first five books of the Bible written by Moses. By Jesus' day they'd figured out that some of them were probably more crucial than others, and were working on the question, "Which is the most important commandment?" since keeping all 613 in mind constantly was a bit of a chore. Jesus said, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. And the second commandment is like unto it: Love your neighbor and yourself. All of the law and the prophets swings on these two principles."

I copied the whole Bible out by hand in a ten year personal spiritual discipline based on Deuteronomy 17:18-20--this being required for rulers among God's people (kings, in particular) in those days. Took me ten years. I came away with a very high regard for the way God set up the "God-run nation" theocracy for His people He'd just sprung from 400 years of slavery down in Egypt.

Nobody I know of currently is keeping, or is able to keep, all 613 laws--not even the Orthodox Jews, who work at it the hardest. Simple reason is that there is no theocracy--a nation and people whose civil law coincides directly with Divine law as given through Moses. Some of those 613 laws had to do with regulations for conducting warfare. Others had to do with structures for kingship and civil courts. Others have to do with land use, madatory vacations, humane and just bankrupcy laws, ecological measures, making sure everyone has a piece of land of their own at least once during their lifetime, ect. Still other laws had to do with rituals and sacrifices for keeping the temple operating. (No temple since the Roman general, Titus, destroyed it in 70 A.D., so those would be difficult to put into effect.)

Some laws had to do with health concerns. They had two basic approaches: 1. Preventative medicine--part of which is where the oysters in a half shell bit comes from, and 2. Quarantining of those likely to be contagious--which is where the bit about touching the body of a dead animal, or human, comes from. The person who did that had to wash their clothing and themselves, then stay away from others for a prescribed period of time. If they showed signs of infectious diseases--skin abnormalities or bodily dischanges of unusual kinds--they were also required to exclude themselves from the camp to avoid infecting others.

In the case of a human corpse being touched, you made a sacrifice of a cow, burning it to ashes. Then you mixed those ashes with water, went to a place outside the camp, and washed yourself down with soot water. (Also, you had to clean your clothes, of course.) You couldn't go back into the camp quite yet, however. Instead, you waited a week, then repeated the washing with the soot water again. After that, you were declared clean and fit for human company.

Sounds a bit kooky at first glance. Makes good sense on closer inspection. If the person you touched who had died had been poisoned, the charcoal in the first round of sooty water would get it off anyone who had come in contact with the deceased. By the end of the week, the charcoal/ashes in the water would have turned it into the same kind of lye solution early Americans used as a base for their soap. Any biological organisms that might still be lurking would be killed with that lye solution.

I met a man who had his advanced degree in public health who had written a book on the strange laws of Leviticus. He claimed they were all based on what we today would call "good science". Even something as peculiar as not boiling a young goat in its mother's milk makes sense. If you cook it hot enough to keep the meat from being raw, you scald the milk and spoil it. If you simmer it to avoid scalding the milk, there may be disease organisms in the undercooked meat that can be a problem.

There is even one law among the 613 that forbids tatooing. When I took orientation for going into work in the prison, and they were describing the health problems of inmates, they brought out a whole bag of confisticated inmate tatooing devices. "This is the major health problem behind bars currently," they informed us. "Blood transmitted disease spreads more quickly by this means among our locked down population than any other way." God had warned against the practice 3,500 years earlier, not giving the reasons, but simply saying, "Don't do it. Why not? 'Cause I'm God, and I said so!" Kind of like a parents forbidding a thing, and giving the reason "'Cause I'm the Mom!" instead of a long detailed explanation the kid probably will argue with and not understand anyhow.

Leviticus 18 is a whole dirty laundry list of forbidden sexual partners and practices. There's practically nothing new under the sun since then by way of peculiar personal habits that doesn't appear here. Dangerous genetic combinations, phychological well being in interpersonal family relationships, and disease control are plainly served by paying attention and avoiding those particular "abominations". If we complied for even a single generation with what's written there, a great many of the huge international health problems we currently face would simply disappear.

I know people sometimes find humor in these sections of the Bible, and I enjoy a good laugh along with others. But I've seen for myself what's in the Book. All of it,and in context. There isn't a nation on earth currently with as wise, healthy, and just laws as a society that would operate according to those 613 regulations. Doesn't mean I think we should recreate a theocracy by trying to get a nation to adopt everthing that is written there. It does mean I believe there's a powerful lot of sound wisdom and practical live principles that could be gleaned and adapted from much of what is written still.

You're a city manager. Do you know those old laws even have regulations about constructing safe buildings, so that people won't be injured. You had to build a railing around your roof, so no one would fall off. The moldy houses down in New Orleans, according to Levitical law, would be put off limits for human habitation until they had been scraped down, repainted, and inspected later to see if mold was still growing. If it were, such a house would be torn down and its materials taken clear out of the city to a dump site where people wouldn't catch the kinds of diseases that lurk in mold. That would be a health regulation for the benefit of everyone in the city. There is a huge ammount of very practical stuff that we can, and should, be applying there right along with the Levitical Two-Step stuff.

The denomination I belong to adopted one such law a few generations back--the one on clean and unclean meats found in Leviticus 11 and 14. We adapted some of the additional health laws as we were able as well to our current situation. The result? Even with uneven compliance among our membership, we live 7-12 years longer than folks that looked at those law and got nothing more than a laugh from them. Now I don't think my own church has come near mining the benefit we might in searching out and implementing these regulations. If we had, think how much more we would have benefitted. Those doing these studies say all the medical advances in the last 80 years haven't added as many extra years of life as we get from life style choices. Govornments of countries have and are studying us as a group and recommending life style changes in line with what we practice as the best means of keeping their populations healthy and lowering skyrocketing medical costs. There is currently another major study being done about the health benefits we enjoy. I understand National Geographic will also be featuring us shortly in an issue on health. None of this would be happening, except for our rather minimal compliance with only a few features of the Levitical laws, and the marked, testable benefits we have enjoyed as a result.

You're certainly correct in saying "the Bible's full of kinky things". But I'm not certain we preachers serve anyone well by suggesting people shouldn't see them, or by preventing them from learning what's actually there. In our day, if what you know of the Bible you gained primarily from sitting in church, talking with contemporary Christians, or listening to media holy types, you're fairly ignorant of its contents. So are most of them. A great deal of very useful material is considered "politically incorrect", even within the confines of your average Christian community.

Glad you did some looking for yourself, Joe. I did, and continue to do so regularly. Personally, I think its a way better Book than even those who wave it most vigorously believe it is. It covers everything from intergalactic politics to how to plant a tree. It is a far different Book than a person would ever guess without up close, personal, ongoing, careful investigation. There's a lot less stained-glass religiosity, and and lot more real life. It is also the only functional time machine in existence.

Keep writing.

Skip

P.S. I thought I recognized the Girabraldi, Oregon city from our trip to Tillamook last summer. If I'm not mistaken, I went fishing for a day on the ocean from that port. I caught so many fish the other fishermen were coming up and rubbing their poles on me for good luck. Back at port, I gave them all away. Personally, I go even more conservative on the diet end of things than allowed in Leviticus with its clean and unclean meats. I'm a fourth generation vegetarian, the original diet prescribed in Genesis 1:29, whose benefits are noted again in the first chapter of Daniel. Still do like to fish, however. So I'm glad there were others willing to eat what I caught.

You're up near La Grande currently? We're doing a Katrina benefit concert January 14th at the new Adventist church next to the public library in Ontario, Oregon, just across the river. I'm recruiting musicians. You have any original music that would work for a church venue? If you've got a group, we'd be looking for a from 3 to 5 song set. (Soloists 1-3 songs.) Since the venue is a church this round, the material should be appropriate to such a setting. We'd like to do another secular benefit concert for the same cause a few months later. Email me at: <SkipJohnson777@gmail.com> if you're interested in a performance opportunity for a good cause. We're helping local volunteers with travel expenses to go to manage a warehouse out of New Orleans that will need to be functioning for a couple of years to meet the needs of those affected by Katrina.




[This message has been edited by Skip Johnson (edited 11-05-2005).]

Skip-

I really like the "Pocket Full of Stars" title. I might use that one. I just need to find the time to write it.....

Thanks, and God bless!!!

~~Kassie~~

Hi Skip,

Thanks again for the hook list. I noticed a couple on there that folks here have already written...like Dawg and Idamarie have a song called WHISPER MY NAME. I have one called FINDING FAITH. I think all my friends are afraid to talk with me. They keep hearing their comments in my songs!

Hugs,
Bobbie

Howdy Joe,

Thanks for reposting the Abomination Two Step. I needed another fix of that!! It STILL gets me laughing out loud!! I do hope you WILL record it because I definitely want a copy! My favorite spot is about leaving the pictures out of Deuteronomy!! LOL

Hugs,
Bobbie

Hello Skip,

I see one in here I may try.
Thanks.

Calvin

Bobbie,

If you've got them handy, could you repost the lyrics you wrote with "Whisper My Name" and "Finding Faith"? I'd like to see what you did with those hooks.

Thanks!

Skip

Hi, Bobbie! I'm glad you like "The Abomination Two Step"; that means you just raised the number of people who like it by 50%. Not many songwriters achieve that in one night.

And Skip, the reason I checked back in here was to agree with you. Most of those dietary and cleanliness laws made perfect sense for a desert tribe that was trying to ensure survival and maintain a sense of community identity at the same time. And a lot of them continue to make sense. What I have a problem with is taking them out of context--which Bush did, and the person who wrote that Open Letter did, *and* I did, deliberately, in the song.

And I would like to perform at your concert. Probably ought to be at the "secular" one, though--you've heard what my religious songs are like.

Joe
www.soundclick.com/bands/7/joewrabek_music.htm

[This message has been edited by roxhythe (edited 11-05-2005).]

Joe,

We'll be looking for a suitable venue for a secular concert. I'll let you know when and where if it works out as we are hoping.

I've got a number of songs still looking for a suitable audiance. Some are halfway between the cathouse and the cathedral, and would likely offend the patrons of both! Guess we got to write 'em like we see 'em, and maybe amuse no one beyond ourselves.

Keep writing.

Skip

Skip, "halfway between the cathouse and the cathedral" sounds like a line that needs a song to go with it. Keep me posted, please.

Joe
www.soundclick.com/bands/7/joewrabek_music.htm

Joe,

Here's one of the lyrics I was thinking of...

Seven Scarlet Sisters
(And the Queen of Red Lights)

Some say our Mother Eve employed
Her wiles on Adam at the tree--
Saying, "If you'll taste a bit,
You can have a bite of me!"
Adam paid up. Now he's dead.
We've Eve's daughters here instead.
They have leverage in bed,
And know we'll pay the fee.

A certain class relies on cash,
Instead of on "I do's".
They strut in gaudy houses
That stink perfume and booze.
Mirrors upon the ceilings
Relfect amazing sights--
Of those Seven Scarlet Sisters,
And the Queen of Red Lights.

Seven Scarlet Sisters singing,
"Lay your money down!"
While the Queen of Red Lights
Is calling for another round.
There'll be sweet sin a'plenty,
If you've brought your tens and twenties
For those Seven Scarlet Sisters,
And the Queen of Red Lights.

Some say that Mary Magdalene,
Who wiped our Lord's feet with her hair--
Plied the Scarlet Sister trade,
Yet turned to walk with angels fair.
The wise man's words ring like a bell,
He warns of pleasures harlots sell:
"Her bed's a highway straight for hell--
So be wise, and beware!"

Yet when a lass relies on cash,
Instead of on "I do's"--
And takes her men by lusty scores,
Instead of ones and twos--
There's a host of foolish fellows
Who'll flock to see the sight,
Of those Seven Scarlet Sisters,
And the Queen of Red Lights.

Seven Scarlet Sisters singing,
"Lay your money down!"
While the Queen of Red Lights
Is calling for another round.
There'll be sweet sin a'plenty,
If you've brought your tens and twenties
For those Seven Scarlet Sisters,
And the Queen of Red Lights.

Seven Scarlet Sisters singing,
"Lay your money down!"
While the Queen of Red Lights
Is calling for another round.
Its in your King James Bible,
You can read of it tonight--
'Bout those Seven Scarlet Sisters,
And the Queen of Red Lights."

c2005 Skip Johnson
All rights reserved


Note: Extended post warning. If you want to understand the lyric above, and why a preacher would write such a thing, keep reading...

The "Seven Scarlet Sisters" of the Bible are seven shady ladies featured among its stories. They include:

1. TAMAR--the clever harlot, whose father-in-law was her one and only trick.

She was the daughter-in-law of Judah, one of the twelve patriarchs whose name is written on the gates of the New Jerusalem. When two of Judah's sons married this black widow and died in her bed, he refused to give her his youngest son--though according to customs of the time, he was obliged to do so. Tamar saw she was being cheated out of a son and her old age pension and place in the tribe, which could only come through producing an heir to inherit her dead first husband's position and wealth. So she dressed up in a veil like a prostitute, and waited along the roadside until her father-in-law, Judah, who had recently become a widower, came along. She propositioned him as a harlot, taking his staff and signet as collateral until he sent back the young goat for her fee. Only she never came for her pay and kept his stuff.

A few months later, when she shows up pregnant, Judah calls for her to be brought forth to be stoned as a harlot--glad for this opportunity to be rid of her once and for all. She says, "I am pregnant by the man who owns these!" And produces his staff and signet. The moral crusader sees she's got him dead to rights. He says, "She's more righteous than I!" The original understatement.

Tamar ends up producing a son by Judah, who is reckoned in the line that led to the Messiah, Jesus Christ.

2. RAHAB--the Cananite Call Girl Who Made Good

Rahab was a harlot who lived in a little mud house of ill-repute located on the wall of Jericho when the Israelites were coming into the promised land. When two Israelite spies holed up in Rahab's haunt after being identified as enemy when they were scouting out her city prior to its seige, Rahab hid them under the flax on her roof. She told the soldiers of her own people they had escaped toward the Jordan River.

Then she went up on top of the wall and made a deal with the two followers of Jehovah. "I spared your lives," she told them. "Now I want something in return. I know your God is the greatest God, and that you will surely destroy this city. When you do, spare my father, mother, brothers, sisters, and all who belong to them!" They agreed to the price for her services, stipulating her family must be within the doors of her house when the city fell. And also that she must hang the scarlet cord by which she let them down over the wall to safety from her window to mark her house for their soldiers. Then she let them down into the darkness outside the wall on the cord, telling them to hide three days in the caves opposite the city from the river until their pursuers returned from chasing them.

When the city walls fell before the marching feet of Israel's army and their war cry, according to God's instructions for attacking its palm tree high walls, only one section of the wall refused to fall down. It was that section where a scarlet cord hung from the window. So Rahab and her family were spared death that came upon the rest of that city's inhabitants.

Rahab, according to Jewish legend, married the Israelite leader Joshua's son, Salmon. She is reputed to have been one of the world's four most beautiful women. Of her descendants were born eight prophets, including Jeremiah, and the prophetess Huldah. Also, Rahab appears as one of the great-great-grandmothers of our Lord Jesus Himself.


3. DELILAH--Bringer of Darkness, for a price

This Philistine woman was actually the third woman the strong man, Samson, unwisely got involved with romantically. While Samson was famed for his incredible strength, he was a moral weakling--falling first for a Philistine girl of the town of Timnah, then for an unnamed harlot in the Philistine supercity of Gaza, and finally for Delilah, who appears to be his live in girlfriend with a taste for bondage sexual play.

Delilah's name was drawn from the title for a certain god her people worshipped who was the eater of daylight, who brought on darkness. This proved fitting, since Delilah, for pay by the Philistine rulers, sought to find the secret of Samson's great strength for 5,500 pieces of silver. That was a great deal of money, and could have purchased between 200 and 300 slaves. Delilah kept after Samson with weeping and sighs until he finally told her the secret. He was a Nazarite, whose vow to Hebrew God included never cutting his long hair. If his hair were cut, the superhuman strength by which he fought the Philistines would be gone. He would be as weak as any other man.

Delilah informed the Philistine lords to come with razor and soldiers. Then she lulled the great-maned Samson to sleep on her lap, while a man with a razor cut away his symbol of loyalty to the God of Israel. When Samson awoke and went out to fight his enemies as usual, he found God's Spirit had left him. The Philistine soldiers caught him, bound him, put out his eyes, and led him away in chains to the prison in Gaza. So Delilah, daughter of darkness, stole the light from the eyes of the man who should have blinded himself to the beauties of the daughters of the Philistines, his people's enemies.

Later, from the Gaza prison, after Samson's hair had grown out again, he was brought for public display at a festival in the great temple of the Philistine god, Dagon. This half fish, half man idol was worshipped with drinking and mirth. The blind Samson was led out by the hand by a small boy, like a dog on a leash, while the gathered Philistines howled in laughter and praised their god, Dagon, for delivering the slaughterer of their people into their hands.

Samson had the boy lead him to the place where the two pillars held up the temple, saying he wished to rest against them. Then he prayed to God, and was given strength to pull down the entire temple on himself. So he died along with 3,000 of Dagon's worshippers when the upper crowded balconies collapsed on those below. Delilah was likely present too, and probably died at the hand of the man who had been so cruelly blinded by her cunning for a consideration of silver paid to her.

4. JEZABEL, the Harlot Witch Queen, promoter of Sacred Prostitution

Jezabel was the daughter of Eth Baal, the priest king of the wealthy port city of Tyre on the coast of the Medeterranean Sea north along the coast from Israel's territory. She married Ahab, the king of Israel. But she never quit being a worshipper and promoter of Baal, the idol god of her father, or of the Ashterahs, the female consort goddess who completed the fertility male-female elements celebrated by the sacred orgies. In these celebrations, infants were concieved whom no one knew the actual parentage. Some were raised to be priests of the idol groves. Others were offered on the flaming altars alive.

(It was rather like our modern practice of abortion, where sexual liberty is encouraged in a society, and the infants concieved without a family in place to raise them are sacrificed to erase the predictable results. Only back then, they killed the kids after they were born, while we do so before hand--and they put a religious veneer on the whole show.)

Jezabel fought the prophets of Jehovah, and did all in her power to attach the Israelites to the worship of the idol gods of her own people. She slaughtered so many prophets of God that at one point there were only 100 left, hiding in caves and eating bread and water to escape the Queen's wrath. Meanwhile, she fed 850 of her own priests and prophets of Baal from her husband king's table in royal style.

Jezebel was high priestess of the sensual orgies of the sacred idol groves, and a cunning, cruel and entirely ruthless woman. On one occassion she had an innocent vine grower and his sons framed and slain to obtain their vineyard as a vegtable garden for her husband's summer palace. Because of this, the prophet Elijah predicted she would be eaten by dogs and turned to dung in the very vineyard she had stolen.

Thirteen years later, what had been predicted of this harlot witch came to pass. Her own servants cast the old queen, who had dolled herself up in cosmetics and fine robes, from the summer palace window to her death beneath the pounding hooves of the chariots of her enemies. Her killer, Jehu, who had seized the palace and fed himself at her bounty, finally sent someone out to bury Jezabel's body.

But it was too late. Jezabel had been eaten by the wild dogs, all except her hands and the soles of her feet. These canine fulfiller's of prophecy had turned Jezabel into dung on the face of the vineyard she had stolen, just outside the palace walls-- according to the prophecy of Elijah.

5. BATHSHEBA--the Beauty in the Bath

Bathsheba was King David's great downfall. She was the wife of one of David's most loyal soldiers, a man by the name of Uriah the Hittite. While the army, and Uriah, were off besieging an enemy city, King David stayed behind in Jerusalem. Too much idle time on his hands, and unable to sleep one night, David went up on the roof of his palace. There he saw down into the courtyard of one of his subjects, Uriah the Hittite.

Bathsheba was in her bath, probably an outdoor backyard hot tub style pool used by Jewish women in those times for purification cleansings following their monthly period. Such a cleansing meant a woman was ready to resume sexual relationships. God had earlier told His people to wash their bodies with water every time they had sex, which anchored personal cleanliness with eroticism in the Hebrew mind.

Bathsheba was a most beautiful woman, and she hadn't been very careful about who might see her bathing. David had her brought to the palace. Though he knew she was Uriah's wife, he lay with her. Then he sent her home. A while later, with her absent husband still off at war, Bathsheba sent David a message. "I'm pregrant."

David had Uriah sent home to Jerusalem on the pretense of getting information about the seige from him. He hoped Uriah would go home, sleep with his wife, and think the baby was his own. But this loyal soldier knew the rest of his comrads were without their wives sleeping in tents at the besieged city. Uriah refused to go home to Bathsheba, but slept on the floor with the king's guards at the palace the first night. David got him good and drunk the next night, hoping he'd wander on home and bed his wife--or at least think he had. But Uriah slept on the floor with the king's guards again.

Finally, David sent a sealed message by Uriah's hand to the general in charge of besieging the city. "Put Uriah at the front of the fighting. Press the attack. Then withdraw from him so the enemy will kill him." The general complied. When new came Uriah the Hittite had been killed, along with several other soldiers, in a too close attack on the city wall, David took Bathsheba as his own wife.

But the thing he did displeased the Lord.

Nathan, the prophet confronted King David with his adultery and murder, and David deeply and sincerely repented. But the consequences of his great sin darkened the rest of David's life. In the years that followed, four first-born sons of the king by his various wives all ended up dying as a direct unfolding of the result of David's great sin. Still, Bathsheba's second son (the first she had concieved in sin with David died at birth) was Solomon. Through his line Jesus Christ would one day be born. So Bathsheba, the sixth Scarlet Sister, is an ancestress of the Messiah also.

6. Herodias and Salomne--the Mother and Daughter Sex-for-Power Tag Team

I suppose you could get eight Scarlet Sisters if you counted both these ladies in the line up. But really the mother, Herodias, stands behind her comely daughter, pulling the strings for her own benefit.

Herodias was King Herod's brother's wife. Only she saw King Herod as a better rising star to hook her garter strap to in order to rise to power in the Roman Empire. So Herodias left her husband and moved in with her brother-in-law, King Herod. She brought along her daughter, Salomne. (This is the same Herod whose soldiers later beat Jesus, dressed him in the purple robe of a king, and put the crown of thorns on his head before he was crucified.)

Herodias' bid for power by bedding King Herod ran into two snags, however. The first was the prophet, John the Baptist. He called sin, sin--no matter who was committing it. He told King Herod plainly, "You should not be be bedding your brother's wife." For this, Herod threw John the Baptist into prison. But he was afraid to kill him for fear of the people, who knew John was right and knew he spoke as a prophet for God. Sometimes Herod would have John brought before him, and have him preach him a sermon, before sending him back to prison again. This unresolved situation bothered Herodias, since the prophet's words threatened her own shaky position as king's consort.

The other problem for Herodias was that a man as jaded and debauched as King Herod couldn't sustain sexual interest in any particular woman very long. He was paying Herodias less and less attention. But she noticed him eyeing her earliteen daughter, Salomne, who was coming in the first swelling bloom of womanhood. Herodias saw she could still control King Herod by skillful use of her daughter's sexuality.

The occasion of Herod's birthday party gave Herodias the opportunity she had been seeking. The king had invited many distinguished guests to the celebration. Herodias schooled her daughter on dancing for these besotted men a sensual dance designed to inflame their male passions and to dethrone Herod's good judgement.

When Salomne's provocative performance had ended, the inflamed King Herod cried, "Ask anything you want, up to half my kingdom! I will give it to you!" Obviously, his blood had headed south, and there wasn't much left to keep his brain functioning properly.

The girl went back to her mother, Herodias, for advice on what request she should make. Herodias sent her back to Herod with these words: "I want the head of John the Baptist brought to me here, now, on a platter!" Herod was appalled, but because of his oath and his dinner guests, he sent to the prison to have the prophet executed. Soon the holy man's gory, severed head was brought and placed in the hands of the dancing girl, who took it to her mother.

It was sex for blood, to maintain power, with mother schooling daughter in the feminine arts of controlling men by calculated sensuality.

7. MARY MAGDALENE--the Prostitute Who Loved Jesus

There are actually three different stories in the gospels about the last Scarlet Sister I would include on this list. Some think these stories refer to three different women who came in contact with Jesus during his three years of active ministry. Others claim all three women mentioned were, in fact, the same person. I will agree with the latter view for purposes here. At the very least, these stories show how Jesus related to women of ill repute.

Mary of Magdalene is believed to be the sister of Martha and Lazarus (Lazarus is a man Jesus raised to life again after he'd been dead and buried for four days.).

She first came into contact with Jesus, according to some Bible students' reckoning, when she was dragged before him by his enemies. They said, "Teacher, this woman was caught in adultry--in the very act! The law of Moses commands such women be stoned. But what do you say?" They didn't really care about Mary one way or the other. She was simply a useful pawn in their attempts to discredit and destroy Jesus' ministry--which was wildly popular among the common people, but was making the religious establishment very unhappy.

According to the law of Moses, both an adulterer and an adultress were to be stoned. So where was Mary's guilty partner? Why had they let the man go, and dragged this woman, probably nearly naked into public to cast her to the ground in front of Jesus? The crowd were already picking up stones. There's nothing that will increase the octane of any situation like sexuality being involved.

Jesus knew what his enemies were up to. He stooped down and began writing in the dust at his feet, the way a rabbi wrote out an answer before giving a verbal reply when asked a particularly difficult question. They press him for an answer, knowing if he says to let her go they can accuse him to the Jewish people as an opposer of the laws of Moses--hardly a recommendation for a spiritual teacher or leader. If, on the other hand, Jesus says to stone her, they will accuse him to the Roman overlords of their nation as one taking upon himself perogatives that the Romans kept under their own control--namely, the death penalty. Either way, they figure this woman was their weapon to destroy this upstart, unschooled, unauthorized rabbi.

Jesus stands up, looks the accusers in the eye, and says, "He who is without sin among you, let him cast the first stone." Then he kneels down and beging to write in the dust again. Mary's accusers, being pointedly ignored, began crowding close to see what Jesus was writing in the dust. Then, according to the Bible, they began to leave, one by one, beginning with the oldest and ending with the youngest.

What had they seen written by the finger of Jesus in the dust? Nobody knows for certain. But the greatest likelihood is that he wrote a word or phrase that identified the deepest and darkest sin of each accuser, beginning with the oldest and most culpable, and working his way down to the youngest, who might still have a chance of abandoning his wrong course.

Finally, Jesus looks up. All those who had dragged the poor woman before him begging him to give the word to stone her are gone. "Where are your accusers?" he asks the woman. She looks up. "There is no one left to accuse me," she says in astonishment. "Neither do I condemn you," Jesus tells her. "Go your way, and sin no more."

If this is the same Mary we read about later on, simply walking away from a life of prostitution wasn't easy. She had some major emotional and spiritual trama bonds that kept dragging her back into her old ways. The Bible says she was the one Jesus "cast seven demons out of". Pretty intense, soul-deep stuff. Jesus rescued this same woman more than once. Most of the time, he rescued her from herself. No matter what she did, he simply never gave up on her.

Eventually, she went home to live with her brother and sister in Bethany. Her shared home became a spot Jesus and his disciples often stopped at on trips to Jerusalem for hospitality. There Mary would sit at Jesus' feet and listen to his teachings--a thing a woman normally would not have been permitted to do in that male-dominated society. But, when others complained, Jesus defended Mary's right to be included with his other male listeners.

Now Jesus had healed a Pharisee named Simon of leprosy, and the Pharisee decided to repay Jesus' by holding a feast in his honor. Mary knew about this feast. When everyone was inside eating--lying on the floor with their feet outward and the food in the middle--she came in quietly. This was an acceptable practice in those days at a public feast--kind of like someone walking in off the street for a church social.

What Mary did next, wasn't acceptable conduct, however. She took a very costly alabaster box filled with fragrant spikenard--a gift fit for a king, and worth more than a year's wages--and broke it and poured it on Jesus' feet. Then she began weeping in love for what he had done for her, in sorrow for the life she had left behind, and in her sure knowledge that this man who genuinely loved her, rather than using her, would soon be dead.

Soon she realized she had forgotten to bring a towel to wipe Jesus feet with. So Mary undid her long hair and used that to wipe the Master's feet instead. The rich fragrance quickly filled the chamber, and the other guests all looked to see this known prostitute at Jesus' feet. They knew she had lived a sinful life in the city. Here she was with her hair unfastened in public (it was a disgrace for a woman to let her hair down except before her husband and family) wiping Jesus' feet with it, and weeping.

Simon saw what was happening and began thinking, "This man Jesus cannot be a prophet. If he was, he would know what kind of a woman is doing this--what a sinner she is!" Jesus knew what Simon was thinking. He also knew something else that you can find hidden in the story he told next, but is so subtly hinted at that only Simon would know for certain. Jesus pointed out the fact that while this woman was indeed a sinner, so was Simon. She had been forgiven much, and loved much. Simon felt little need for forgiveness, but needed it perhaps even more badly than Mary.

In fact, there are some who believe Simon was the first one who seduced this same Mary when she was only a young girl. We would call it child molestation today. Simon was himself responsible for the devestation that had played itself out in Mary's life for all the world to see. Yet because his act was secret, the proud Pharisee Simon's own reputation had been preserved. Jesus, very kindly, yet pointedly, called Simon on what he had done long ago to injure the woman he now scorned as a sinner.

Further, Jesus defended Mary's gracious act of annointing him with the spikenard perfume. She understood what not even his own closest disciples had figured out yet. Very soon, Jesus would die. His enemies simply wouldn't let such a man live any longer. He told Mary's critics, "Let her alone. It is a beautiful thing she has done. She has prepared me in advance for my funeral. Wherever the gospel is preached, this story will be also told of what she has done." All four gospels record the incident.

Where did Mary get enough money to buy such a fragrant and costly gift? Very likely, it was her wages as a harlot--the pay recieved from the life Jesus freed her from.

Mary of Magdalene shows up afterward as one of the three women who stood at the foot of the cross when Jesus was dying--at a time when all but one of his 12 disciples had forsaken him in fear of sharing his fate. She was also one of the women who went to the tomb Sunday morning to help complete the burial ceremonies she had begun only a short time earlier at Simon's feast. And it was the same prostitute, Mary of Magdalene, who was the very first human to whom Jesus revealed himself after his resurrection. He sent her back to let the others know he was alive.

Mary of Magdalene is certainly a fitting final and seventh Scarlet Sister in the Bible's list...

But what about "THE QUEEN OF RED LIGHTS"?

This "Queen of Red Lights" is a symbolic personage--rather like Lady Liberty, or Mother Earth. In the Old Testament, the nation Babylon was pictured under the figure of a Harlot Queen Sorceress of great evil, deception and cruelty. This symbolic woman is presented in contrast to Israel, who appears as a virgin daughter. These two symbolic women were in conflict, Babylon being the primary religious and military opponent of God's people, Israel.

Ancient Babylon finally fell and never rose again, as prophecy had predicted. It is still a heap of ruins to this day. But according to the Bible, there will be an end time spiritual Babylon too. The image of the Harlot Sorceress Queen of Evil becomes a potent symbol of the multi-faceted combination of false religions and govornments in the end times in the book of Revelation. She's not only a harlot herself, but is a mother of harlots, and the primary source "of the abominations of the earth".

In the Bible's final book, Babylon is pictured again as a harlot, dressed in royal scarlet, purple and gold, and sitting astride a crimson beast. She holds a golden cup in her hand, filled with the filth of her immorality--an ugly picture indeed! She's bedded so many kings it takes a cup to hold the evidence of her conduct. She is drunken with the blood of the saints and God's prophets she has killed. And, like Jezabel, she decieves all who live on the earth, enticing them into false worship. The whole world is intoxicated with her illicit passions and demonic deceptions--and this climaxes immediately before the coming final judgment of God on the planet. Babylon is the Bible's most potent symbol of calculated evil that arises from mixing religion, sex, money, politics and power for control of earth's inhabitants.

In the end, Babylon's former lovers are predicted to turn on her, strip her naked, eat her flesh, and burn her with fire for her sins. Being stoned was the penalty for simple adultery in Moses' day. But if the woman were the daughter of a priest, then she was burned with fire instead. The end time Babylon is a religious/political organization that perverts its powers to decieve earth's inhabitants into false worship and the persecution of God's true followers. Who are they? They believe in Jesus and keep all ten of God's commandments. Babylon is the real "Queen of Red Lights".

I'm not making this stuff up. Go read it yourself.

Whew! Another long post. Joe, if you, or anyone else has read this far, congradulations. Now consider going and reading something worthy of such effort. The Bible.

SJ




[This message has been edited by Skip Johnson (edited 11-07-2005).]

Skip, this'd make a heck of a sermon. Absolutely riveting. The harlots drag 'em in (of course), and the background just gets fascinatiner and fascinatiner. And notice it started off with one of your "almost in a cathouse" songs.

Joe
www.soundclick.com/bands/7/joewrabek_music.htm

Joe,

I was thinking about the above post through sermon eyes after I'd finished writing it last night. I might clip that Seven Scarlet Sisters post, and develop it in that direction. Got to admit, not all my exposure to Scarlet Sisters has been solely through the pages of the Bible, however.

Before I was in grade school, my father volunteered my services as a typical kid to the Home Ec class at the girl's reform school where he taught for 18 years during my growing up years. A good chunk of the young ladies in there had been incarcerated on prostitution charges. They treated me great! I think they'd make great moms, if somebody who should have been their protector early on hadn't trained them to provide sex for favors. My father sat in on numerous "case studies" where they tried to figure out how a girl's life had gotten the the point that brought her to their facility. Dad said that in every single case, they were able to trace the start back to an older brother, father, step-father, grandpa, uncle, teacher, pastor, or some other authority figure who had molested the girl at an impressionable young age. They were already trained into the lifestyle before they ever hit the street--generally to get away from their perpetrator--and were officially recruited by a pimp.

The other major exposure to prostitutes as a part of the five years of weekly street outreach at Waikiki during my time there as a chaplain and Bible teacher for a little Christian high school in Honolulu. I started my work on a corner being actively worked by a dozen ladies of the night. When they saw me singing Christian songs prevented their attempts at soliciting the international river of humanity that poured down the crowded sidewalks, they did everything they could to haze me so I would leave. Sometimes they crowded me so closely that I could have swayed on the soles of my feet and bumped a hooker on either side of me.

Once a pimp came out, stood toe to toe with me, and smoked a cigarette, blowing blue smoke in my face with every breath. I just kept playing my guitar and singing Christian songs. I refused to budge. Finally, he reached around me and put out his butt on the ornate trash can I was leaning against at my elbow. Then he shrugged and went back into the hotel where the girls from other corners were reeling in their tricks. Guess we were both "fishing for men". Two of his stable--a couple very cute and fresh-to-the-business young Mainland beauties--had been soliciting hundreds of men without success on my outreach corner for the past four hours without making a single sale. They had finally called him to come help on their cell phone. Sure enough, he showed up. His girls simply couldn't get any takers with me singing "The Old Rugged Cross" and "Amazing Grace" over their solicitations.

(I also sometimes sang, what I call "Street Fighting Songs" I'd written myself that explicitly opposed their efforts. Sometimes a group of 40 or more gape jawed tourists would be standing around ogling their struts. A couple verses of a song would break the spell, and sour business for the next little while.)

There were months of Christian Street Fighting, with me going back and telling stories of what was happening to my students, fellow church members and the staff at the academy. I got a lot of "friendly fire" for where I chose to hang out on Monday evenings from people who, by rights, should have been helping me. Eventuallly both other member of my own church, as well as increasing numbers of my students began coming down to lend aid.

We handed out our literature, some of which recommended the Bible day for worship--Saturday. This stirred other Christian groups on island. They thought we were overlooking saying more important things, in their estimation. Pretty soon more and more groups began coming down and staking out corners of their own for street outreach to hand out their own literature. We welcomed them all. (I had assisted another group for the first year, since no one from my denomination was interested in that kind of ministry. In fact, I had inherited their old corner when they finally gave it up due to the heavy prostitution traffic there.)

Upshot was that what neither police action, nor citizens picketing had been able to achieve previously occurred. Prostitution on the water front dropped to such a low level the legistlature was finally able to pass a law against it, and make it stick. Unless the church is doing its business, it shouldn't complain because the govornment isn't doing its business.

All that was really a side issue, however. Our main target group were the international tourists who visited literally from every nation on the planet in the course of a year.

I recall one incident that happened several months into my own entry into street outreach in prime Scarlet Sister territory. I had a bowl I set against a palm tree mid-sidewalk on my corner. It had a sign that read:

Bowl of Blessing

Leave a gift in love,
Take a gift in need.
More blessed him who gives,
Than him who shall recieve.

We met many in great need of help while doing our work. The island has a homeless population of over 8,000. People could either leave money, or if they chose take it from my donations bowl.

One evening, a half drunk wino came by and spotted my sign. He said, "I know you won't give me money for liquor, but I'm hungry. Would you buy me a sandwich from the shop across the street?" I left my guitar with a friend I'd made who worked my same corner wearing a sandwich board promoting tourism activities. The wino and I stepped to the curb to wait the light to change so we could cross to the sandwich shop. Now just on the other side of the wino was one of the Scarlet Sisters, a honey blond beauty who favored smart business suits and mini skirts. I'd named her Manhatten Honey in the journal I had kept, and she'd worked my corner on and off for a couple months already. (Not a single girl ever successfully completed a sex sale on my corner when I was singing there, though some approached hundreds of men, and on occassions they outnumbered me a dozen to one.) The wino looked at me, then at Manhatten Honey, then roared, "I know you're a Christian. What do you think of all these HOOKERS!"

Now I'd been pondering that question for the past few months--testosterone and the Spirit of God struggling to sort themselves out. These women were some of the most exotically beautiful beauties on the planet, and were dressed to achieve their business goals. I knew whatever I said was going to go from my mouth to Manhatten Honey's ear on behalf of the whole of the Christian faith, and my God Himself. I'd done my praying before I went down. Now I must speak.

"I don't know what she's charging," I said loudly enough so both of them could hear. "But whatever it is, she's worth more than that."

Eventually, we won the street fighting, and the prostitutes retreated from the water front Main Street of the islands. By then, I had up to 50 students coming down Monday evenings to help with our growing street outreach we named "Island Fire Ministries". We learned a great deal about how to approach people of widely and wildly differing world views and religious inclinations. Our best of about ten approaches we develope over those years was one we learned from the prostitutes. We simply walked up to person after person, and talked to them pointedly and directly, offering them our literature. You get 25 teams of two kids each doing that, and you can distribute as high as 6,000 pieces of literature in a couple of hours.

So I've got a soft spot in my heart for hookers, though we almost never spoke to one another. (Sometimes they would stand 20 or 30 feet away and shout curses at me, however.) In fact, the very first Scarlet Sister who ever accepted our literature a few weeks after the incident with the wino was Manhatten Honey herself, and a similarly employed friend. I think she knew I was safe.

SJ

P.S. I once had a parishioner who had been a prostitute during her younger days. She eventually became a Christian. When we got to doing street outreach handing out literature, she finally discovered her true calling. She had a well-developed knack for accosting total strangers on personal subjects. She put it to good use as our star distributer of Christian tracts, once giving out 1,200 in a single week to people riding the city bus system. When she died, I met her kids. There were eight of them, all with different fathers, and all racial mixes. She'd favored foreign tricks when she was working for the other side.

[This message has been edited by Skip Johnson (edited 11-06-2005).]

Good story (and another potential sermon, too). Good thing, probably, I wasn't the pimp. I'd have had the girls learn your songs, and sing along with you while you were doing your shtick on the corner and they were crowded around you. Maybe put up a sandwich-board saying "The Good-Time Girls," and hand out cards (tasteful and legal ones, of course) that said "For a good time, call..."

And of course, I could have used all those great movie lines like "Padre, we're both in the solicitation business" and "We both sell salvation, Padre--yours is just longer-term than mine." Tons of fun...

Joe
www.soundclick.com/bands/7/joewrabek_music.htm

Joe,

Now that would certainly have been a sight to behold. Bet your girls would have ended up working for me before we'd finished that face off.

There is one preacher whose ministry I read of in a series of books called "20 Centuries of Great Preaching" who was responsible for closing down 20 or more houses of prostitution. Guess he had something better to offer than their madams and pimps. I like how you put it, a more long-term salvation.

SJ

Skip, not only would I have been sure of it, I'd have said so. That's one pimp line that I haven't seen in the movies: "I know you're going to win in the end, Padre--but the question is, which of us is going to have the most fun at it?"

Joe

Joe,

Me!

SJ

Well, when I saw the title of this thread, I was going to say that I thought the point of Hookin' was that it wasn't free, but I see the thread has already gone in that direction.

As for the general concept, I think it's good, and would like to add that we should also start a list of potential band names. "Joe's Band" just doesn't do much for me. On the other hand, here are a few more creative ideas:

Gluteus Maximus and the Muscle Tones (Do-wop band?)
Swami and the Insights
Ravi Shankar's Socks
Reverend Skip and the Scarlet Sisters

What else can we come up with?

Joe,

LOL! Now do you think they'd take a group like that in either the cat house, or the cathedral? We'd be out on the street--which come to think of it, might be the best place all around...

SJ

P.S. Band names would make a good thread, and you've got some good starters here.

Skip,
Caterpillar Cries that is so cute totally melted Me..... :0)

My daughter keeps telling me I need to name the band "The Decaying Chipmunks." Dead dogs, y'know...

Joe
www.soundclick.com/bands/7/joewrabek_music.htm

P.S. When we played our Katrina benefit concert, we told the paper just to call us "Anna, Joe, Matt, and maybe Sharon." (We weren't sure Sharon was going to be able to make it.) People came anyway.

Oh, and on the subject of Websites (which is *way* up there, now): My daughter was writing a short story and wanted to mention a fictitious Website (we'd talked about copyrights), so she came up with the most off-the-wall thing she could think of--NakedSpaceCowgirls.com. We checked the URL. It existed...

[This message has been edited by roxhythe (edited 11-06-2005).]

Giddy Girl,

Gonna include that "Naked Space Cowgirls" in the hook/title list above. It does elicit an emotional response---incredulity! We've got to get a different thread going for those unusual group names.

SJ