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Bayside
by Gary E. Andrews - 10/19/26 10:48 PM
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Lets try to write a song. Like they do on who's line is it anyway. add up to two lines per user First Line Bring me a bottle of forget her So I can ease the hurt and pain www.songwritercountry.com/songwriterjg
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Johnny G: Lets try to write a song. Like they do on who's line is it anyway. add up to two lines per user
First Line
Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
With the moment in time rembered
Blurred in a glass of love in vain
www.songwritercountry.com/songwriterjg </font>
Mark Boucot
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I love that show!!
ok here's my two lines.
Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
Cus after today is over
nothin's ever gonna be the same
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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Red I appreciate the effort , but the idea is to continue the song with the last prior post until we get a complete song.....thanks
each new post should add two new line to song
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Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
With the moment in time rembered
Blurred in a glass of love in vainI've walked on down the sidewalk Through a pouring rain ------------------ DakLander [This message has been edited by daklander (edited 07-10-2003).]
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Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
With the moment in time remembered
Blurred in a glass of love in vain
I've walked on down the sidewalk
Through a pouring rain
Chorus: (the old "don't bore us get to the chorus" thing, since there have been three like rhymes.)
"Her Heart is Hard to Find"
Her lips could fool the blind
[This message has been edited by dhsongs (edited 07-10-2003).]
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by dhsongs:
(the old "don't bore us get to the chorus" thing, since there have been three like rhymes.)
</font> Ah, but to my read on the song, it begs four (4) like rhymes & then tear into the Chorus & a different direction on the next verse. ![[Linked Image]](http://www.justplainfolks.org/ubb/biggrin.gif) That's what's so great about collaboration on anything. The difference in reads and direction can be amazing & still work. ------------------ DakLander
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never seen one of these things amout to anything, but still think it is fun to do. Like buying lotto tickets. And yep. Feels like a like rhyme thing to me to. Haven't figured what the e old bore us/chorus has to do with the rhyme either. Here we go. Looks like a 16 bar thing to me. Bring me a bottle of forget her So I can ease the hurt and pain With the moment in time rembered Blurred in a glass of love in vain I've walked on down the sidewalk Through a pouring rain. And why should love be all. That's gone gurglin'down the drain. ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
With the moment in time rembered
Blurred in a glass of love in vain
I've walked on down the sidewalk
Through a pouring rain.
And why should love be all.
That's gone gurglin'down the drain.
And I'll be left standing on my feet
Only to walk down Lonely Street
[/B][/QUOTE]
Mark Boucot
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Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
With the moment in time rembered
Blurred in a glass of love in vain
I've walked on down the sidewalk
Through a pouring rain.
And why should love be all.
That's gone gurglin'down the drain.
And I'll be left standing on my feet
Only to walk down Lonely Street
Window shopping in self loathing's heat
Into the cold I'm bound to meet
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by A1CWatton:
Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
With the moment in time rembered
Blurred in a glass of love in vain
I've walked on down the sidewalk
Through a pouring rain.
And why should love be all.
That's gone gurglin'down the drain.
And I'll be left standing on my feet
Only to walk down Lonely Street
Window shopping in self loathing's heat
Into the cold I'm bound to meet</font> The memory of something sweet and the bitter mistakes I know I will repeat. ------------------ Doug Kolmar - Singer/songwriter http://bmind.home.mindspring.com/music/dkhome.htm
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Just copying and pasting the last take so it is easy to pick up and keep in order. For those who don't know how to do that: Select the lastest conribution with your mouse and in Edit click copy then in your reply window go to edit in the toolbar and click pase. It will all go i as writen and you can type your contribution on t it. Loking at that last one. I like: HOPE will be repeated, rather than KNOW. Mind boggles at where that could go. By the way. I liked the lines I dropped in and they now are the title and hook of one of my lyrics on Lyrics 2. Music just about done for it. and a couple of lines to bend to fit that. Graham Bring me a bottle of forget her So I can ease the hurt and pain With the moment in time rembered Blurred in a glass of love in vain I've walked on down the sidewalk Through a pouring rain. And why should love be all. That's gone gurglin'down the drain. And I'll be left standing on my feet Only to walk down Lonely Street Window shopping in self loathing's heat Into the cold I'm bound to meet The memory of something sweet And the bitter mistakes I know I will repeat. ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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Seems to be going well
It's hard to continue on without ryhming isn't it.
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Well I think we are up to the stop boring us, get to choring us , so I would think it would be a good spot to alos change the rhyme pattern. Waiting. Graham ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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No, as the premise was to continue with whatever each one of us does. I choose to start the chorus, which was up to me at that time, as being the next poster. But I see my lines were wiped out.
Thanks guys, real nice. And on my 22nd wedding anniversary too! Oh well, my wife loves me!
Yes it is a big deal since I thought "we're all in this together"!
John Daubert
Boo who
(The old supposed to be funny saying of "don't bore us get to the chorus" was just a way of saying I'm starting the chorus)
[This message has been edited by dhsongs (edited 07-11-2003).]
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John, I think your chorus would have been right in sync if there'd been one more line before the chorus. Then again, maybe not.... ![[Linked Image]](http://www.justplainfolks.org/ubb/smile.gif) ------------------ DakLander
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Whoops. i counted wrong. Sorry guys. need two nines for second verse yet. I didn't see any of yours up John. Stick them mup again. Am sure it must have been a glitch. happens. I'm about to put the sound to the one I wrote out of my two lines now. Graham ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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Always looking for a chance to practice writing music for lyrics, I came up with the 16 bars you can get at the link below. Bring Me A Bottle Excuse the woodenness of the piano playing; I'm not a performer and I havn't had a chance to humanize this yet. Looking forward to the chorus.
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Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can make it all go away
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Bring me a bottle of forget her So I can ease the hurt and pain With the moment in time rembered Blurred in a glass of love in vain I've walked on down the sidewalk Through a pouring rain. And why should love be all. That's gone gurglin'down the drain. And I'll be left standing on my feet Only to walk down Lonely Street Window shopping in self loathing's heat Into the cold I'm bound to meet The memory of something sweet And the bitter mistakes I know I will repeat. (CHORUS), should anyone ever desire to stop versing!)LOL So let me tell ya what's wrong Another sappy-assed love song I swore, I'd never sing one again.... ![[Linked Image]](http://www.justplainfolks.org/ubb/wink.gif) -Gary
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Getting it now RG. Thanks. Where did you want them lines of yours to go? If ya all copy and paste as garry and i are doing, it will be a whole mess easier for all. Don't know how to? I put the instructions up in the earlier post. Graham ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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I "get" it.. but we must have posted a the same time )~~~
I'll just watch. (smile)
anyone else have a problem with the word "gurgling"?? LOL
[This message has been edited by redwriter1 (edited 07-12-2003).]
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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yeah. Someone over on lyrics 2 in the song I wrote that hook today Red. Is the key word in that one to meand sings fine. Think going down the gurgler. Acomon phrase down here, and i am sure is used up there. Drop the end G and it sings fine. Graham ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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PD...music sounds pretty good......I love this place. Evreyone is so fun. I can't wait to get a chapter going the the Muscle Shoals Area. If only Brian would put auto spell checker on our postings the site would be perfect. Thanks to everyone for posting. Lets start another one. Redwriter should have the honors of begining. www.songwritercountry.com/songwriterjg
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I say let's see if this one gets to noise stage first. These let's do a song things don't often make it past the not a bad idea stage. I got the music too and is quite nice, Not quite what I had in mind genre wise and think it would serve better if it had both averse melody and a chorus one. Even better if it was the full bit maybe. We all know where it is going then. Graham ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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Changing the genre is easy enough. I just used that one because I liked the piano arpeggios to help make the chord pattern clearer. The hard part is getting the melody and progression in the first place. Style is just a matter of picking one from BiaB's big library and adjusting the tempo to taste Make suggestions and I'll try 'em out. Then comes the production, tweaking, and performance stuff on the melody tracks so it sounds more natural, none of which I bother with until I have the rest locked in, because it is hard to go backwards. What you heard there took me less than 2 hours start to finish this morning. The way I write I need most of the words in front of me first so I understand the message, and then let that "feeling" drive the melody and style.
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That's cool. Will no doubt have a chorus to work from soon, and then unless anybody decides while firing up after the instrumental they want to do the next bit a bridge thing. you have it all in front of you to work to. I write both with and without words so was just thinking the way i work. And I do the swap genre thing all the time too. Works. Graham ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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Alright Matey! Here Goes the Chorus........
Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
With the moment in time rembered
Blurred in a glass of love in vain
I've walked on down the sidewalk
Through a pouring rain.
And why should love be all.
That's gone gurglin'down the drain.
And I'll be left standing on my feet
Only to walk down Lonely Street
Window shopping in self loathing's heat
Into the cold I'm bound to meet
The memory of something sweet
And the bitter mistakes I know I will repeat.
Chorus
Love is a cruel game
That quickly turns on you
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Second attempt at some music for this. Different style: more Chet Atkins-like. Still probably not the right one, but at least you can hear the melody more clearly. (The boom-chick doesn't really fit the mood.) I also added a bit of the chorus, as suggested by Johhny G's lyrics. Same link as above. [This message has been edited by pd (edited 07-13-2003).]
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Love is a cruel game
That quickly turns on you
been up that road and back again
more times than i wanted too.
[This message has been edited by dstewart (edited 07-13-2003).]
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Another chorus suggestions... Drink 'em away Drink 'em away who was it caused all these problems I'm running from the past looking down the glass there's my face looking up from the bottom ------------------ Doug Kolmar - Singer/songwriter http://bmind.home.mindspring.com/music/dkhome.htm
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Just putting all the bits together here Guys. Doug I haven'tputyourgreat little piece inas it is suposed to be just two lines each. I'd either trim it tofit. Or even bettre . Write a song of myown around it. Is good. Iwrote and recorded one called wilhemina What's Her Name form one of mycomments in this string. This stuff is great for getting the mind going places. Could anyone contributing please copy and paste the whole of the last take into their reply , and the add their bit together to save a lot of back andforth to keep it together. Heck. I like that one Doug. Graham Bring me a bottle of forget her So I can ease the hurt and pain With the moment in time rembered Blurred in a glass of love in vain I've walked on down the sidewalk Through a pouring rain. And why should love be all. That's gone gurglin'down the drain. And I'll be left standing on my feet Only to walk down Lonely Street Window shopping in self loathing's heat Into the cold I'm bound to meet The memory of something sweet And the bitter mistakes I know I will repeat. Chorus Love is a cruel game That quickly turns on you been up that road and back again more times than i wanted too. ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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Hello All. Great Job on the song thus far. Here is what type of tune I imagine for the song. Kind of a Marty Robbins / Hal Ketchum Theme. www.songwritercountry.com/bofh.MP3 let me know what you think. John
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Graham:
Just putting all the bits together here Guys.
Doug I haven'tputyourgreat little piece inas it is suposed to be just two lines each.
I'd either trim it tofit. Or even bettre . Write a song of myown around it. Is good.
Iwrote and recorded one called wilhemina What's Her Name form one of mycomments in this string.
This stuff is great for getting the mind going places.
Could anyone contributing please copy and paste the whole of the last take into their reply , and the add their bit together to save a lot of back andforth to keep it together.
Heck. I like that one Doug.
Graham
Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
With the moment in time rembered
Blurred in a glass of love in vain
I've walked on down the sidewalk
Through a pouring rain.
And why should love be all.
That's gone gurglin'down the drain.
And I'll be left standing on my feet
Only to walk down Lonely Street
Window shopping in self loathing's heat
Into the cold I'm bound to meet
The memory of something sweet
And the bitter mistakes I know I will repeat.
Chorus
Love is a cruel game
That quickly turns on you
been up that road and back again
more times than i wanted too.
</font> Right - got a little carried away there - well - it's out there maybe it'll spin off into something new... -Doug ------------------ Doug Kolmar - Singer/songwriter http://bmind.home.mindspring.com/music/dkhome.htm
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Actually wrote a bit of music yesterday this will sing to I think, and that great little four liner of Doug's even fits as the bridge i think. Not that that works par the project guide lines. Just mentionin g the fact. Might sing it later today and wack it somewhere for folks to hear another way to go noisewise. Graham ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Johnny G: Hello All. Great Job on the song thus far. Here is what type of tune I imagine for the song. Kind of a Marty Robbins / Hal Ketchum Theme.
www.songwritercountry.com/bofh.MP3
let me know what you think.
John</font> ------------------ DakLander
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Yep. I'm with dak. Like that Cobber. Graham I went in to sing this to the music I did yesterday, and danged if i didn;'t get an idea for a lyric so wrote it and sang it. F 'N' G Blues it is called when i get it uploaded directly. Gotta go with the muse. Graham ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/grahamhendersonmusic.htm
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So far this lyric is looking really good. I like the premise. Lets keep up the good work and we might have a JPF hit song on our hands...:-)
I re-arranged what I thought might make a better lead in to the chorus:
"When She's Got You Beat" written by members of JPFOLKS
(V1)
Bring me a bottle of forget her
So I can ease the hurt and pain
With the moment in time rembered
Blurred in a glass of love in vain
I've walked on down the sidewalk
Through a pouring rain.
And why should love be all.
That's gone gurglin'down the drain.
(Pre-chorus)
And I'll be left standing on my feet
Only to walk down Lonely Street
Window shopping in self loathing's heat
Into the cold I'm bound to meet-
(Chorus)
Love is a cruel game
That quickly turns on you
been up that road and back again
more times than i wanted too.
So run while you can
Take the easy street
You're no longer a man
When she's got you beat
(new verse)
The memory of something sweet
And the bitter mistakes I know I will repeat.
[This message has been edited by A1CWatton (edited 07-16-2003).]
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Johnny: You want ME to start one... wow! What a great invitation... !
Ummm do a just think of a line at random? or should it be a hook/title with the first lines? Give me a hint and I'll give it a whirl. (smile)
"It Mattered to THAT One"
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