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I wrote this in 1994 while working as an LVN in a Neo Natal Intensive Care Unit working with a LOT of drug babies. This is sung from the perspective of the fetus.
V1 Good morning, you up there Can you hear me way down here? What’s for breakfast, what’s for lunch? A cigarette first, of course.
Careful now, it’s me in here Do you know the man upstairs Will he be there when I arrive?
Chorus Music under water sounds so beautiful. Is that you talking to me? Is that my father or will his name escape you? Are you escaping now? Are you escaping now?
V2 I hear your heart, do you hear mine? Thanks to you I’m feeling fine. A little faster than I’d expect but so is yours.
v3 Tell me now, when I arrive will I be able to survive? What you need, I need like you will you feed me too?
Music under water sounds so beautiful. Are you singing this song to me? What's that I feel, does the name escape you? Are we escaping now?
interlude
bridge Hey set em up, I could use a drink, I’ve been awake for 3 long days. Shoot one up, I crave another, more than a mother, now. More than a mother now.
solo
v3 Well I’m here and underweight, tell me why my body aches. Not for breakfast, not for lunch This is why why I cry so much.
Music under water was so beautiful now your're never around. where is my father, what will he call me? Do you hear me calling, now?
Do you hear me calling now?
Do you hear me calling now?
Last edited by Michael W. Brown; 07/13/2609:28 AM.
Write on, Man, Michael W. Brown, f.k.a. "bluesriff"
"The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others." Mahatma Gandhi
The "man upstairs" is one of several guys that could be the father. I guess you could say it references "God' too. But my intention was not to be ambiguous here. I guess either can be interpreted. Thank you for the listen and critique, John.
Write on, Man, Michael W. Brown, f.k.a. "bluesriff"
"The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others." Mahatma Gandhi
Writing from the perspective of an unborn child dealing with maternal addiction is an incredibly daring choice. It showcases an ability to tackle complex, uncomfortable human conditions without relying on cliché. The recurring line "Music under water sounds so beautiful" is genuinely brilliant lyricism. It creates a haunting, cinematic contrast to the dark theme.
The imagery here is incredibly powerful, and the 'womb POV' is a daring, creative choice—especially the metaphor of underwater music. It’s undeniably strong writing. However, because the subject matter is so heavy and raw, it feels like a niche piece rather than a commercial track. It's tough to digest, which means it might struggle with repeat streams or mainstream appeal. If the goal is marketability, opening up the chorus to a more universal emotional hook could help listeners connect without feeling overwhelmed by the darkness of the verses.
I have to admit, I enjoyed listening to this but it did give me shivers. You are a very talented writer.
I did write this in an emotional vacuum; it was a long 12 hour, Saturday night pm shift in the NICU with a few especially sad cases and outcomes. That being said, I appreciate your kindness and honesty. I agree and saw this to be an issue early on, as far as the subject matter and the "mansplaining" and "insensitivity" towards the mother. And I agree. I was mad at these mother's (and probably a few issues with my own)....and you nailed it. If I want more universal appeal, have the mother and child fight this addiction together....perhaps a two way conversation that offers a bit more hope and a lot less blame. Or maybe leave it for that nuanced audience who may just need it raw and in their face.... and who may choose a different path. I think most everyone will agree that it's brutal and should be toned down and perhaps I should show more sympathy for the mother. Today, 30 years after the initial write, I agree. I appreciate ya, Rob.
Thank you, brother.
Write on, Man, Michael W. Brown, f.k.a. "bluesriff"
"The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others." Mahatma Gandhi
Not to make light of a serious problem. My Bromberg brain made light by humour re imaged the baby as tough guy Arnold s, complete with cigar….a survivor in a cruel world…
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