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Hey All,

Well I took the plunge and put up a film script on Amazon Studios.



The Brakeman

I'm still not too sure about crowd sourcing regarding film scripts, but thought I'd give it a go and get a good beating by the ravishing hoards.

Will report back if I survive.

cheers, niteshift

PS - all positive reviews recieve a bottle of beer ( by fax ) and all negative ones ..... well, I'll have to think about that one.

Well, the page looks good and the synopsis sounds interesting. Congrats on getting it out there. It does not do any good sitting in the closet.

Thanks Colin !

Yeah, you're right. This is quite a different concept, and getting it out there is probably worthwhile.

I've come from a background where projects were put together "in secret", then road tested, and finally presented, so as not to show their faults from the outset. This model is warts and all.

Will it work ? I don't know, but have decided this is a beta test. If it gets panned by a general audience, then perhaps it deserves to be shelved. Why waste time and effort in something that an audience is not interested in ?

Anyways, we'll see what happens, and I'll duly report back the findings.

cheers, niteshift

My apologies Nite. I got caught up in other "Life" business the last coupla weeks. Gonna check this out now.

And for what it's worth, "road testing" isn't such a bad idea. Theatre has done that for decades with out-of-town tryouts, often resulting in major changes/improvement...I'm not sure about the wuality of input form the Amazon crowd, but it's definitely worth a try.

Will get back to you.

Midnite

Thanks Mate,

No rush. Life is more important.

Any thoughts on http://labs.triggerstreet.com/niteshift ?

It's got a great review process, and some pretty good writers too.

cheers, niteshift

Oh great !

Getting 2/5's at Trigger St, .. oh well, time for the 4th draft..... *sigh*... at least I'm used to rejection

cheers, niteshift

Double post

Woohoo! Just got a 3/10 from The Blacklist.

I guess the only way is up. *bangs head on desk*

At least I'm brilliant at failure.

cheers, niteshift ( who has gone down to the garden to eat worms )

Mmmm....Worms....Yummy!

Me, I'm to timid to even TRY the Blacklist.

Screenwriting is like songwriting for masochists. Why spend a week on three verses, when you can spend a year or two(or 5) on 100 pages and get the same soul-numbing responses?

Stick with the nice, soft worms, and try to keep away from sharp objects like razor knives.


Midnite

Interesting synopsis Nite. I imagine getting a screen play off the ground is a hard nut to crack.

Have you seen this website: http://www.filmmaking.net/

Good luck!

Best, John

Logline : When a failed songwriter fails at screenwriting too, he goes down to the garden to eat worms. When a fellow scrennwriter mentions the word "knife" the first one tops himself.

FADE TO BLACK



cheers, niteshift

Thanks John, I'll check it out.

cheers, niteshift

Oh well, just got rejection No4, at least it's from a major studio. ( not Amazon ) The comment was....

Most will question the reality of the main character's job and how that could balance with wanting to be song writer. For the feel good ending to work more scenes and story to her songwriting must be injected.

And that's from the synopsis only..... not the script, they haven't even read it. Or even listened to any of the songs, as you're not "allowed" to pitch a film script with any other material even being remotely presnt in a music based film script. Geeza ! An there's 14 bloomin songs in it. *shakes head*

Crikey ! I know song writers from all walks of life. Why can't a songwriter be a stock broker ? I bet I can name MANY professoional people who are songwriters, and it's a common thing that those who are successful in one thing are quite often artistic in a parrallel opposite kind of way.

I love the "wanting" to be a song writer bit. You either are or you are not. There is no choice, regardless of your current position. Kinda like your sexuality or your temperament.

Bah ! Humbug ! They simply don't understand my artistic brillliance !

Time to eat more worms, and stay away from razor blades.

cheers, niteshift

PS - ... wanting to be song writer. is not even correct English.

Congratulations on getting a response of any kind. Most of my music marketing schemes do not even receive a "go to hell".

Colin,

Yeah, in some ways, I just wished I got the standard "no thanks, not what we're looking for" form letter.

At least there was a response..... I suppose.... but just try to tell ME ( after 30 yrs ) what a songwriter "IS" when you have no idea.....

It's Ok, I hope this doesn't look like sour grapes ( which it isn't ) , just another pothole on the speedway of life.

cheer, niteshift

Oh well,

2 more rejections this week, along the lines lines of.... "thanks, but it just doesn't grab us".

But on a positive note, some upbeat comments from Trigger St, some very insightful views, and the re-formatted script actually got liked on Facebook. BY ONE WHOLE PERSON ! Whoohoo !

Um, what does THAT mean ? *shrugs^

One thing is, I now know very clearly where the re-writes need to occur, and to what extent.

The annoying side ? There really are a few folks out there who are so "concerned" with "correct" format it seems to overpower them. If it's not "standard" ( no such thing ) Academy format, then you're a very naughty boy indeed, and should be whipped into line with a soggy bagel.

I wonder how they explain "concept sold to Universal" where the script hasn't even been written yet ? *shakes head again*

Anyways, onward and...... um,..... sideways.

cheers, niteshift

What is it they say about rejection? If you can't stand rejection in the arts, you don't belong there. Keep plugging away!!!!!

Thanks mate,

Little steps, little steps.....

cheers, niteshift

PS - no desire for worms or razor blades tonight. Always a good thing.

Oooh.... up to 3/5 stars at Trigger Street. I'm over half way liked !

CHOO choo choo choo..... CHOO choo choo choo..... I think I can.... chugga chugga chugga......

cheers, niteshift

Hey Geoff,

Can you tell me more about the Amazon Studio thing? It's the first I have heard of it?

Brian

Hey Brian,

Amazon Studios is basically a site where you put up your script. In doing so, they have first option ( in partnership with Warner Bros ) to option it. That's a $10k payment, essentially a development grant to take it further and work on it.

They have 45 days first option, then it all expires.

To be honest, it's meant to be a development site where other writers comment on your work, can get involved and suggest re-writes ( with your permission ) and make things better.

I haven't had one comment, and I feel it's just a total free for all. No community, and essentially no interest in your work, and it's essentially a lottery ticket.

Trigger Street Labs however is a totally different concept. Run by Kevin Spacy for the last ten years or so, bills itself as "writers helping other writers".

Great, positive feedback ( even if you suck ) at the pointy end of the stick.

Essentially, you put up your work. Then request an "assignment". You review the work at hand, and that gives you one credit for your own work to be assigned for review to others. In this way, you must WORK, for your work to be reviewed.

Then on top of that, you are asked to review 2 reviews before your own review is posted, and also a ten question questionarre to establish that you have actually read the work in question. In that way, there is a screening process involved and a self perpetuating quality control proceess of the feedback you are getting back. i.e. the review rating is weighted according to what others think of it.

Did I see you were thinking of doing something in film/TV a while back Brian ? If so, I would highly recommend Trigger St. It's tough. It's savage. But very honest in the end, of where you are up to in the process script wise.

Likewise you may like to look at the process involved as it may help folks here who are more serious in their critique/feedback stuff and may want to give a more structured reply in their critiques.

It wouldn't work "as is", as a film scipt takes a heck of a lot lore work than a single song, but the overall theme is worth looking into.

cheers, niteshift

Nite,

They must be using the same engine/software that Project Greenlight (the Matt Damon/Ben Affleck TV Show) used when they were in operation. I used to do critiques there and was given some type of special recognition as a top reviewer for the rated quality of my feedback. But in truth, I never got to review a decent script to review, they were are terrible. And that in part was why their show/project failed sadly. I had planned to submit a screenplay for the next show but it was cancelled before they even finished broadcasting the final season, though I thought it was by far the best one and getting better each year. If they had stuck with it I honestly think they were on to something huge, but of course as is usual, networks are short sighted and have no ability to project the future very well.

Brian

Hey Brian,

Yeah, it sounds very similar in it's set-up. Even the reviews are reviewd, so you can't get much better quality control than that.

I'm very grateful for the detailed notes provided, and can step wawy now with a clearer thought process of where it needs re-writes. I now know for example that pages 10-30 pretty much suck, and can can concentrate on the builds needed for the whole thing to work better.

As a writers' site, it's great, but to be honest, I'd really like to see more producer and director involvement. I know that's almost impossible, as there would be 100 script writers per producer present, but that's the reality of how film projects are mainly put together.

How's your film project going ? I would definitely reccomend running your script through Trigger Street. You even see very experienced writers thanking folks for picking up those odd small things which have slipped under the radar, most often continuity points which have evaded the writer.

I'll report back after the re-write and see if I can evaluate a noticable difference in how it is percieved.

Perhaps I can do better than my current 2 star rating.

cheers, niteshift

Hey Brian,

Just got notification that the script passed Round 1 ( the "Qualifying Round" ) at the filmmakers.com site for their annual awards process.

And there you have Project Greenlight as one of the sponsers/supporters/filtering process, so it all sounds legit.

http://screenplaycontest.net/index-5.html#1stRoundQualifiers . under Drama, way down the page.

I'm not one for entering contests, but as an unknown writer, the studio notes themselves, I think, are worthwhile, and that's after a major re-write, which I'm still not happy with.

Bit different from writing a song huh ?

cheers, niteshift

PS - be sure to put in a good word, and I'll buy you a beer.

Be especially careful of the worms with hidden razor blades !@!!

I think the Brakeman will eventually be a hit, just keep reminding yourself it's like a hundred songs all written to tell one story , in the form of a super long music video format, with some talking between the songs...ha...that puts it in perspective for me...and just like with the songwriting, use your keen sense of who's full of crap and who isn't before you go to twerking anything...ha.

write on mate.

Check, Moker !

Worms and razor blades under control.

cheers mate, niteshift

Well, just made the second round of the filmmakers.com script contest....


Beverly Hills, CA -- Filmmakers.com is pleased to announce the 2nd. Round Qualifiers in the Filmmakers International Screenwriting Awards Screenplay Contest.
(The quarterfinals will be announced on or by January 25th).

http://screenplaycontest.net/index-5.html

Choo choo choo..... chug chug chug..... I think I can I think I can .......

cheers, niteshift

Hmmmm .... made it into the Quarter Finals ....

http://screenplaycontest.net/index-5.html

cheers, niteshift

Hi niteshift!

I'm new to this part of the forum -- I don't get out much -- LOL!

I just read this very interesting thread, culminating with the fact that "The Brakeman" has made it into the Quarter Finals! Congratulations -- I'll be crossing my fingers for your continued success! I see the script has been taken down, so I'll comment on your visual...it's very eye-catching and artsy and well done! I love the juxtaposition of all the elements there. I've already formed part of the storyline in my head by looking at it!

Lisa

Hey Lisa,

Thanks for the comments and the interest mate.

Well, just got notified that The Brakeman has made it to the semifinals at filmmakers.com ( results not posted yet )

Hmm, might have to get out the red pen for some MORE revision. Oh, the anticp.p.p.p.p.p.pation of it all.

cheers, niteshift

Well that's COOL!!! Congrats and best of luck during the next phase!
Lisa

Hello Geoff,

(( GOOD LUCK TO YoU ))


Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

Hey Lisa and Calvin,

Thanks guys for the positive vibes guys.

I think I can...... I think I can..... CHOO CHOO CHOO ... picking up steam !

cheers, niteshift

Oh well, made the semi-finals, but have been passed over for the finals.

Does that mean it's half good or half bad ? LOL

........ I think it means it's time for more revision.

cheers, niteshift

Hi nite,
I'm sorry to hear it didn't make the finals, but I think it's very cool that you got as far as you did! It also adds to the play's provenance, perhaps? Maybe you can use it as a future marketing tool-- "Brakeman, a semifinalist in the Trigger Street competition..."

On the plus side, too, it was so lovely of them to give you an excuse to make more fun revisions!
Lisa

Cheers Lisa !

Was just informed by a major Hollywood studio today, by a minion that "it's not quite what we're looking for at the moment".

How quaint !

Must go now, and pace up and down the hall muttering "they just don't get it".

Onward and sideways.....

cheers, niteshift

Congradgulations!

Did you use musical references with that or were they seperate?
I would like to get in to video presentations and stories to go with a song.
Never got around to videos and writing synapses, but it is great to see members doing that and would like to learn the fundamentals of that.

Not been around much this past year...but this thread drew me in.

All I can say is take what you learn and keep moving forward, because you are in the learning stage. The fact you made it to a late round means you are making progress.

And it is not that they don't get it...it's that you have not made them see what they want to see. So solve for the gaps and keep going. It seems to have helped you progress this far


So keep at her and learn lots. Let me challenge and encourage you to be the first JPF member to option and sell a screenplay.

Great advice John. Thanks !

cheers, niteshift

I reviewed scripts for them as well. And while they were bad I thought some of the ones I read were better than the finalists and winners. I don't think they had a good system for the early rounds of screening.

Oops! I just realized how old the thread was! My bad....

No worries Jay, it's all part of the conversation.

cheers, niteshift

And another thread to add to the conversation with a write up of Matt Damon and Ben Affleck's Project GreenLight ....

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/11/02/a...okie-director-a-hollywood-education.html

cheers, niteshift

Okeedokee, I'll toss another two cents in...

Write what you gotta write, and you'll be a richer person for the experience of following something through.

Where it goes, nobody knows, but that doesn't negate the Muse!

Cheers back at'cha Nite!

Midnite

Nailed !

cheers, niteshift

FWIW: Back in August of 2010, I met a young wanna-be screenwriter born and bred in Egypt, who was looking for a partner to help "Americanize" his screenplay while he continued with his day-job(an Assistant College Professor---or something like that).

He had an extremely original concept!!!, and I just couldn't resist trying to help him out...I mean, the "concept" was all his, all I had to do was "Americanize" it...Two years later, 2012, with a hundred e-mails and rewrites between us, we had it ready to submit.

And submit it we DID!!!,,,via an e-mail list of producers/agents/studios that I had built up...We got over three dozen "submission requests"...Kinda KEWL!!!

Of course, nothing came of it....It wasn't a "Known Franchise", and was on the "Big Budget" scale, so no one would take a chance...And frankly, I don't blame them!!!

But from 2012(our submission phase) until now, three years later, we have continued to keep in touch, while I keep going through transitionary day-jobs and he kept teaching and trying to find a University where he can pursue his PhD...

In the last 3 years, he has TOTALLY revamped & rewitten the original/submitted draft...And has dragged me along in the process:-)...Other than or "concept", nothing of the original remains....

Next year, he is leaving Egypt for the first time in his life and moving to England, where a University has "accepted" his application...

Three weeks ago, he sent me the first part of a "short story" that he wants to present to his niece as a gift...I was not quite brutal in my critique, but told him that I knew he could do better.

He agreed....Man, Geoff, he is one of the best writing partners I have ever had...He's gonna keep rewriting the short story and sending me drafts until he gets it perfect, no matter how many years it takes...What have I gotten myself into????...:-)

And he then sent me his "Final Effort" at the 87th rewrite of the original screenplay...because I've told him that at some point, you have to be done with something and move on, and he just wanted me to know that he's "moving on" but wanted me see his "final draft"...I was SO FRICKIN' honored!!!

I'm rambling, ain't I???...:-)

So I'll try to sum up, for those of us in this "Forum"...

A Muse is a Muse is a Muse...I think of The Muses as The Pleiades Constellation Sisters...If you look directly at them, you'll see nothing...

Don't give up the day-job-education-pursuit....But never turn your back on a Muse.....But it's not the Muses' job to pay anyone's bills....The Muses' "job" is to inspire...

And any one of us mortals( a relatively small percentage) who has ever heard a Muses' voice, should we thank(or curse???:-)... The Creator who "gifted" us with "ears to hear"...

Just wondering:-)

Midnite(forever thankful to my young Egyptian Friend for helping me to understand why we were "Gifted")Bob

P.S...Yes, I still remember our initial script swap of "The Brakeman" when I gave you a "Doh" moment:-)))))

Hey Midnite,

What a great testimony to "the way it is".

Couldn't have put it better myself.

Geez, 87th re-write ? Now, there's dedication for you !

cheers, niteshift

What dedication and it's a shame that many wannabe's do not have that same dedication

I knew a lady who had written a book it was titled THE PATH OF THE DEAD, by Caroline Benton I was talking to her partner about life in general and I came up with the line - Life Is A Contact Sport -

What I was getting at was if no one who is in a position to help us does not know what you can do , you will get no where
with that in mind they had a call from some one who was looking for a storyline for a film, they arranged a meeting and they turned out to be a couple of dreamers, who offered her the sum of ten dollars for the rights of using the storyline, they of course refused and they mentioned it to me , I said send it to a reputable publisher who has already had some success, and ask him what would be the minimum advance for a similar situation

This particular Publisher read a few pages of the storyline
and was so impressed he gave her a contract for Publishing it both in book form and Kindle , a second novel was due to be finished, and he asked her if she did short crime stories for magazines. She then submitted some she had already written
and she started earning money via the royalties

This is a case of an author with purely a query that lead to a Publishing Deal

Eh, Well niteshift,
Since you posted you message I wrote a short story I am going to submit as soon as my copyright registration comes back. No hurry as it is a good basic story. No, I am not a writer as such. This one just came to me.

Lovely story Cheyenne. Thanks....In reality, it probably won't lead to much $$, but the $$ ain't quite the point...

....Not that I wouldn't mind some:-)

Midnite