Welcome to the Just Plain Folks forums! You are currently viewing our forums as a Guest which gives you limited access to most of our discussions and to other features.
By joining our free community you will have access to post and respond to topics, communicate privately with our users (PM), respond to polls, upload content, and access many other features. Registration is fast, simple, and absolutely free; so please join our community today!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 10,330
Top 10 Poster
|
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 10,330 |
You have a good start on this, but more work is necessary in my opinion. There is a lot of repetition and not that much story happening. You may want to make the Front Pew Christian the chorus and supply more details in what is currently the chorus. Or simply not repeat the front pew Christian so many times.
Is he preaching from the pulpit and then walking back to his pew? Or is he giving a testimony?
Predilection could be used to rhyme with addiction.
This seems so generic. Perhaps write out the story in more detail (even if you don't use all the detail) and it will help you create some variety in the verses and supply you with more opportunities for rhyme scheme.
Good luck with this.
|
|
|
|
We would like to keep the membership in Just Plain Folks FREE! Your donation helps support the many programs we offer including Road Trips and the Music Awards.
|
|
|
Forums118
Topics129,171
Posts1,186,185
Members21,480
| |
Most Online236,505
Jul 1st, 2026
|
|
|
"Do not endeavor to be the smartest kid in a dumb class. Instead, you are better off being the dumbest kid in the smartest class, where you will be challenged and you will learn. If you aren't growing, you are dying." -Brian Austin Whitney
|
|
|
|
