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Real Deal
by Brian Austin Whitney - 05/07/26 01:38 AM
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Flyte
by Gary E. Andrews - 05/06/26 05:36 PM
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 487
Top 500 Poster
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Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 487 |
Very nice work, indeed. I'd take the suggestion from TKO, if it fits the melody. Very nice suggestion. I love the bridge. Very strong and clever. The only part that bothers me, is the first line of the second verse. It doesn't fit the verse, in my opinion. But, what do I know? Great write. Loved the story.
Rick Maines
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"I left my home, only to find a new home, full of heart, soul and dreams. Then, I left that new home, heart intact, but much stronger and energized from the experience" -Brian Austin Whitney
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