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Joined: May 2017
Posts: 2,160 Likes: 26
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Thanks for the kind words, David. You make some good points. I really like the chorus in itself, because it is catchy and memorable (at least, I think so). I'm loathe to ditch any of it because I want to keep the singalong feeling and the sound of the words themselves, independent of their meaning. I also like the fact that it uses the second person - the mister and the sister are the listeners.
BUT you're not the first to wonder about how well it fits with the verses. One the one hand, the idea is that the various parts of the song should be only loosely connected - a kind of chaotic stream of consciousness thing. On the other hand, I don't want to leave the listener frustrated and confused. Your suggestions have given me a lot to think about. Thanks for that.
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