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by Fdemetrio - 04/25/24 01:36 AM
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by Fdemetrio - 04/24/24 10:25 AM
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by Sunset Poet - 04/24/24 08:09 AM
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by Fdemetrio - 04/23/24 10:08 AM
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by Fdemetrio - 04/23/24 12:41 AM
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by Fdemetrio - 04/22/24 10:39 PM
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by Fdemetrio - 04/22/24 11:04 AM
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by Rob B. - 04/21/24 08:40 PM
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by Fdemetrio - 04/20/24 03:22 PM
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Joined: Aug 2002
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Hi Lyric 1 Board! I've visited here a few times and offered some critiques, but never posted a lyric of my own; I've tended to stick with one board. I going to make a conscious effort to balance between the Lyric boards and thought I'd start by offering this one up for your feedback. Thank you in advance for your thoughts; this is a bit outside of my normal style.
Get Over It Teri Foreman-Black C2002
V1: I see that you’ve been troubled and you’re struggling every day You’re getting lost in your ups and downs and can’t seem to find your way I’ve been there too and I’ll go back again But right now I’m on your side Focus on the road ahead And the rest will fall behind
Chorus: Get over it Blow through it Walk around it Just do it
V2: Things happen for a reason and our patience is often tried The harder we go looking, the harder it is to find That missing piece to our life’s puzzle So put your worries to the side Things happen for a reason And life’s not always justified
Repeat Chorus
Bridge: If you’re truly doing the best you can do Worrying won’t help a bit Hold on to the good things in your life Put your hand in mine and let’s get on with it
Ending Overlay: Get over it Blow through it Walk around it Just do it Put your hand in mine Leave the worries behind Put a smile on your face Move on to a better place
[This message has been edited by Teri Foreman-Black (edited 11-07-2002).]
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Teri,
I like the message, but I have trouble getting the flow. I like the first 4 lines of the chorus, but the last four seem too long.
I think the verses are better than the bridge.
Rich
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Very nice flow, and great rise in the chorus. As per changes, I would end the chorus with just do it, and use the second part of the chorus as the bridge. The bridge as it stands now is pretty mundane, "sunshine------rain" a lil too clicheic, (I know in lyric writing cliches are near to impossible to avoid) (Shakespeare it ain't) Do don't do, it's up to you, but I can see this song rockin' the house down!!!!!!!!!!!
------------------ Ritt
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Hey, thanks you two! (Rich and Ritt) Wasn't expecting to see anything back on this until tomorrow. I have NO problem chopping words, it's the editing and new line insertions that I dread, so I'll give this some thought and edit it tomorrow. Yeah, Ritt, I do hate using cliches... and Rich, I can easily chop the chorus down by taking out those last four lines..... Thank you SO much!
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Teri, is it?
This is a killer hook! So good in fact that I wanted to begin the chorus with it — which would of course mean a new chorus :–)
Focus on the road ahead And the rest will fall behind
It's got that "don't come home a drinkin' with lovin' on your mind" ring to it . . . so you could write a chorus like that around it.
------------------ Terry
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Wow!!!!!!!!!!!
------------------ Ritt
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Terry, is it? <big smile>
More, more, more.... ya gotta 'splain your concept a bit more to me pretty please?!
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One thing that could be a problem is the title has been used in many songs. When I first saw the title my thoughts went right to the Eagles with the Hell Freezes Over album. I turn on the tube and what do I see A whole lotta people cryin' "Don't blame me" They point their crooked little fingers at everbody else spend all their time feelin' sorry for themselves Victim of this, victim of that Your momma's too thin; your daddy's too fat
Get over it Get over it All this whinin' and cryin' and pitchin' a fit Get over it, get over it
You say you haven't been the same since you had your little crash But you might feel better if they gave you some cash The more I think about it, Old Billy was right Let's kill all the lawyers - kill 'em tonight You don't want to work; you want to live like a king But the big, bad world doesn't owe you a thing
Get over it Get over it If you don't want to play, then you might as well split Get over it, get over it
It's like going to confession every time I hear you speak You're makin' the most of your losin' streak Some call it sick, but I call it weak
You drag it around like a ball and chain You wallow in the guilt; you wallow in the pain You wave it like a flag, you wear it like a crown Got your mind in the gutter, bringin' everybody down Complain about the present and blame it on the past I'd like to find your inner child and kick its little ass
Get over it Get over it All this bitchin' and moanin' and pitchin' a fit Get over it, get over it
Get over it Get over it It's gotta stop sometime, so why don't you quit Get over it, get over it
Get over it
Later, Carl
[This message has been edited by thunder_road_2051 (edited 11-08-2002).]
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Hey Carl, Thanks for the look! And you can quote the Eagles to me ANYTIME! : : Thanks for taking the time to type that out... I loved every word. Didn't really think about it, but you are right: "Just do it" and/or "Get over it" is out there a lot. I was aiming for a more empathetic approach without blame, where clearly The Eagles took theirs in a whole different direction. I'm hoping, despite the hook, it might still have value in a more upbeat country genre?
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Hi Terinsky,
O.K. you asked for it :—) I'm trying to be a minimalist of late so I don't get list-burned :—)
Follow up to Carl . . . Tentative new Title: "The Road Ahead"
Dummy model chorus:
Focus on the road ahead And the rest will fall behind Don't go head to head with trouble It'll come back to bite your mind Learn who's really there to help Be open to those you find Focus on the road ahead And the rest will fall behind.
------------------ Terry
[This message has been edited by Tall_Terry (edited 11-08-2002).]
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ooohhhhhhh NOW I get it! Hmmmmmmmm I think I can do this! and maybe just use the little 3 letter words as an underlying back-up somehow?! Thanks, Tall One! And what is "list burned"... sounds like it HURTS!
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Teri I loved the song. I enjoy most the lyrics you write though I sometimes do not comment. Do you have music for any of your songs? I would love to listen if you do. Ok I was just to the mp3 forum and listened.
The Eagles are one of my favorite groups also. The song Get Over It that the Eagles have was never a single. My favorite song of theirs is The Last Resort. I think there is a lot of truth in that song. Later, Carl
[This message has been edited by thunder_road_2051 (edited 11-08-2002).]
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