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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 10
Casual Observer
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OP
Casual Observer
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 10 |
There's darkness all around you The old days they're gone You can't relive the past What's done has been done Life takes a backseat As you give hate full control These are your last days They're so cold You're locked in a world Without light, without warmth You've sentenced yourself It's no one's fault but your own Life takes a backseat As you give hate full control These are your last days They're so cold So cold You already have no future Because you chose to believe That for the pain you have caused There can be no reprieve Life takes a backseat As you give hate full control These are your last days They're so cold You're locked in a world Without love You've condemned your soul This path you chose to walk Is your choice nad yours alone Life takes a backseat As you give hate full control These are your last days They're so cold they're so cold So cold ------------------ Eden In Ruins http://www.edeninruins.com http://www.mp3.com/EdenInRuins
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 1,512
Top 100 Poster
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Top 100 Poster
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 1,512 |
hello! Just now got far enough on the board to see this one. Went to MP3 to hear some of the other stuff but was having a glitch of some sort. I will try later. I did read some lyrics on some of the other songs. All That I saw (including this one) are very well written. Very deep subject matter here! Good luck!
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 10,240
Top 10 Poster
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Top 10 Poster
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 10,240 |
Hi....and welcome... Your lyrics look well written and very deep.. this is really just a question...and not a critiquing comment...because i've looked at it a couple times...you've got a rhyme scheme going most way through and just wondering about what I think is the 3rd verse? warmth and own.... just curious.....
Kaley...good luck with this and your other songs.
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 10
Casual Observer
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OP
Casual Observer
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 10 |
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Kaley Willow: [B]you've got a rhyme scheme going most way through and just wondering about what I think is the 3rd verse? warmth and own.... just curious.....
Kaley[B]</font> I didn't want it to rhyme. Since the words were written around the vocal melody I came up with, Own fit better after the end of warmth than everything else I attempted to hyme with warmth. ------------------ Eden In Ruins http://www.edeninruins.com http://www.mp3.com/EdenInRuins
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 7,712
Top 30 Poster
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Top 30 Poster
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 7,712 |
The more depressing, the better!
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