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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4,909
Top 50 Poster
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OP
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4,909 |
What If ?
What if Hank never went Honky Tonkin ? If no shoes, no shirt, was a problem Would George the Cowboy ride away Would Blue Eyes still Cry in the Rain
What if Elvis wasn’t all shook up? Or the Beatles didn’t sing of love Would there be a yellow Submarine Or Maybe Fancy was not her name
~C What if the music didn’t die Would we have heard of Don McLean What if there was no fateful flight How big would the Bopper, be today. Would Buddy top our, Hit Parade
If Fogerty didn’t write swamp music Proud Mary wouldn’t be Tina’s huge hit If James Brown had no brand new bag Would we have heard of Sally’s Mustang
What if Huey didn’t want a new drug? If Jeremiah was a girl frog? Or Jimmy didn’t drink Margaritas Maybe Jessi Colter was Lisa?
What if the music didn’t die Would we have heard of Don McLean What if there was no fateful flight How big would the Bopper, be today. Would Buddy top our, Hit Parade
What if the train didn’t pass Folsom Or Mick got some satisfaction? Would Jude have ever been afraid If Randy's a stranger to the rain?
What if the music didn’t die Would we have heard of Don McLean What if there was no fateful flight How big would the Bopper, be today. Would Buddy top our, Hit Parade
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Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,399 Likes: 2
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Top 200 Poster
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,399 Likes: 2 |
Neil,
Really like the idea behind this one—you have some wonderful lines here, too: “What if Elvis wasnt’ all shook up?; “if Huey didn’t want a new drug”; “if the music didn’t die” and more. I think that challenge here is pulling these all together thematically; right now, it’s read as more of a list—seems like you just need a little hook at the end of the chorus to pull them all together. Just my two cents, and I’m empty on suggestions, but for what it’s worth.
Best regards,
Deej
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4,909
Top 50 Poster
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Top 50 Poster
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4,909 |
Neil,
Really like the idea behind this one—you have some wonderful lines here, too: “What if Elvis wasnt’ all shook up?; “if Huey didn’t want a new drug”; “if the music didn’t die” and more. I think that challenge here is pulling these all together thematically; right now, it’s read as more of a list—seems like you just need a little hook at the end of the chorus to pull them all together. Just my two cents, and I’m empty on suggestions, but for what it’s worth.
Best regards,
Deej great comment too much like a list...needs a focus...got it.
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Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 12,264 Likes: 4
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I saw a similar lyric on FB recently. Not so sure of the commercial appeal of such a list but it's well thought out anyway Travis PS used part of your write on the lyric Red Rose which has had title changes
Last edited by Travis david; 04/21/18 05:01 PM.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4,909
Top 50 Poster
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OP
Top 50 Poster
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4,909 |
I saw a similar lyric on FB recently. Not so sure of the commercial appeal of such a list but it's well thought out anyway Travis PS used part of your write on the lyric Red Rose which has had title changes I got it started from a share, by a Nashville friend, of the same post you are referencing.
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