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#1109955 07/05/16 01:18 AM
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https://soundcloud.com/tom-franz/in-your-eyes

I have been vapor locking on larger arrangements lately. So this is just vox and guitar. Your opinions and advice are always welcome.

In your eyes
Tom Franz
V1
The east winds blew often
In the autumn of that year
I’d come of age before that
But the concept was not clear
V2
My sister’s friend
You were around
Indifference you fained
Until you let me catch you
I have never been the same
C
In your eyes I could see
This power inside me
Of all the gifts there could be
You gave more

By your hand I could feel so much
I was confirmed by your sense of touch
I learned to finish it right and such
Just for you.
V3
The winter brought the rain
The carnal washed me pure
The unknown became known
The frightened became sure
V4
None of this was ever spoken
I saw what I should know
If I had a lot to learn
You never let it show
C
B
By the springtime we were through
I’ve never given you your due
I owe a lot to you
I hope you realize it’s true
C

Tom Franz #1109961 07/05/16 06:06 AM
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A nice write Tom and a powerful performance.
Outstanding guitar work, killer vocals and perfect harmonies.

This is what I call, "Old School Cool".

Nicely Done, Sir.

Tom Franz #1109984 07/05/16 06:06 PM
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Tom! Long time, no hear. This is another example of why I love your style. Still sounding good, lyrically and musically.

What a great turn of phrase for innocence and inexperience. Well done.

Ricki

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Hi Tom,

Nice to hear from you again.
GOOD JOB !

Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

Calvin #1110002 07/06/16 12:40 AM
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Tom,

I loved this simple but interesting composition here. I was drawn in immediately by how your vocal delivery blended so well with your fine guitar playing. It truly is an engaging song and the harmonies were a nice touch. Thanks for sharing! Still have it playing in my head...

Tom

Tom W. #1110026 07/06/16 12:37 PM
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An enjoyable listen, Tom. Interesting. A cool pop feel - especially the chorus...had a bit of a Bacharach/David feel to it. Nice.

Tom Franz #1110057 07/06/16 08:10 PM
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Hi Tom,

This works fine with your simple arrangement, but I keep hearing it like a Tower of Power (ballad) in my imagination, which is aided by those fantastic high harmonies of yours, which are right out of the Delfonics songbook, taking me back to early seventies soul which I greatly love.

Beautiful work..

Great hearing from you!

Mike

Last edited by Michael Zaneski; 07/06/16 08:25 PM.

Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
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hi Tom, this is all good music and lyric,,I hear a very strong voice, good listen.



"Blessed are the words of truth and fiction,
one might save you from the other...Vincent
lane1777 #1110089 07/07/16 05:17 AM
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Nelson,
Thank you for saying that about my harmonies. They are always a big challenge. Never come easy.

Thank you Ricki. This was actually written for my wife. She had a very positive first love when she was young and I imagined it helped her enter adulthood with a lot of confidence. So I just extrapolated from that.

Thank you Calvin.

Tom, thanks so much. I hold you work in such high regard your words mean a lot.

Floyd, "Bacharach/David" what a nice comparison. Thank you.

Mike, Thanks for kind words, I was trying to tap into a little soul thing there. Yeah I too can hear this as a big production. alas large productions are so hard to do. Maybe I'll try. I am checking out the Delfonics.I probably know them. Thanks for being so nice about my harmonies.

Thank you Lane.




Tom Franz #1110147 07/07/16 06:39 PM
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To our ears this song is lyrically, vocally, melodically and instrumentally fascinating. And you wrapped it in an equally interesting arrangement. Mesmerizing actually. Perhaps a bigger production would work but the sparseness of this arrangement is really engaging.

We enjoyed it.

J&B


Check out our new album Janice Merritt "Am I Blue Enough?"
on Spotify, Apple Music, Pandora, Amazon and others.
Tom Franz #1110265 07/08/16 09:37 PM
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Originally Posted by Tom Franz
https://soundcloud.com/tom-franz/in-your-eyes

I have been vapor locking on larger arrangements lately. So this is just vox and guitar. Your opinions and advice are always welcome.

In your eyes
Tom Franz
V1
The east winds blew often
In the autumn of that year
I’d come of age before that
But the concept was not clear
V2
My sister’s friend
You were around
Indifference you fained
Until you let me catch you
I have never been the same
C
In your eyes I could see
This power inside me
Of all the gifts there could be
You gave more

By your hand I could feel so much
I was confirmed by your sense of touch
I learned to finish it right and such
Just for you.
V3
The winter brought the rain
The carnal washed me pure
The unknown became known
The frightened became sure
V4
None of this was ever spoken
I saw what I should know
If I had a lot to learn
You never let it show
C
B
By the springtime we were through
I’ve never given you your due
I owe a lot to you
I hope you realize it’s true
C


Oh Tom,

I was all set to say you've given us the next Wedding Song of the Moment....until I got to your Bridge!! Sniffle sniffle!!

What a terrific tribute to a sweet, magical and meaningful romance. I thought your chorus was particularly stirring.

My only teeny tiny nit is a lyrical one. In the second section of your chorus, which I love....

By your hand I could feel so much
I was confirmed by your sense of touch
I learned to finish it right and such
Just for you.


...I wonder if you might come up with a different/stronger rhyme in lieu of "and such". The rest of the lyric is so poignant and powerful...that line ends up sounding a bit more colloquial. Would you be averse to a loose rhyme? Something maybe like:

"I learned to finish it right and trust"

...which would set up a nice internal rhyme for the last line of the chorus: "Just for you"

Totally KOS!

Regardless, this is a keeper Tom. Thanks a bunch for sharing!!

Beth



http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

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What a great groove and performance...And the arc of the story was perfect...

iggyiggy #1110620 07/13/16 11:35 AM
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Cool song with pretty solid guitar playing.

The guitar performance was good but a changeup in style between some of the parts would have worked better in my opinion.

Kudos on the high harmonies but their overall sound could have knitted better with the lead vocal. They don't sound like they are in the same 'room' with the lead vocalist.

Overall, good 1+1+H!

Peace,
TC


If it has strings I will find a way to play it!

You can hear my tunes at https://soundcloud.com/tc-gypsy
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Hi Tom:

Glad I stopped by for a listen. You write exceptionally well and your arrangements are top notch. I believe this is one of those songs that could be sung in a plethora of genres and I'm not sure which would work best. No matter, it is a really good song and I wish you much success with it. ----Dave

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Bud and Janice, Wow those are really nice words and they mean a lot to me. Thank you so much.

Beth, you are very sweet to say the nice things you did. Thank you.
And yes you are right "and such" is a clunker. I was hoping my provocative "finish it right" would divert everyone's attention. "And Trust" is an excellent alternative. Thanks for that. Oh and I am embarrassed to ask, what does KOS mean???

Iggy, I am honored you would say my 3/4 song has a good groove. That is a wonderful compliment. Thanks.

TC, you are right a change up in guitar style could be a nice enhancement. It's just those three notes and a strum followed the syncopation of the words in the chorus. But I should have switched it up.

Dave, my goodness what nice things to say. That means a lot to me. thank you.

Tom

Tom Franz #1110881 07/18/16 12:25 AM
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Originally Posted by Tom Franz


Beth, you are very sweet to say the nice things you did. Thank you.
And yes you are right "and such" is a clunker. I was hoping my provocative "finish it right" would divert everyone's attention. "And Trust" is an excellent alternative. Thanks for that. Oh and I am embarrassed to ask, what does KOS mean???


Tom


Hey Tom,

Nothing to be embarrassed about grin ! KOS is an acronym for Keep Or Sweep -- essentially take it or leave it!! Btw yes the rest of that line was nicely distracting...

Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

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Just learned that today is your birthday. I know I have responded to your posts a few times and tried to send you a PM but got a message saying that all fields weren't filled so I couldn't send it. Do you have PM blocked by any chance? Have a good one. Peace.

Tom Franz #1128384 06/11/17 10:17 PM
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Tom--

You have laid down an over the top performance--VERY COOL!

Mackie

Tom Franz #1128636 06/23/17 06:07 PM
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Tom,

Simple and sweet. Love it! Sure, I could hear this being done in a more robust arrangement but I kind of dig it just the way it is. Nice write!

Tom

Tom Franz #1128756 06/29/17 02:32 AM
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Hey there Tom........it has been a long time, and you are still amazing me.
OUTSTANDING songwriting and performing!!
Thanks for the listen!!
-Tom


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