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Aunt Nelly © Annee
1.) Aunt Nelly was an outcast, To Granny, Paw and Maw She married Paw’s young brother Became fam-i-ly-in-law. Uncle Bert died by drownin’, In nineteen-thirty-four Nelly was even more alone Than she ever was before.
CH) Aunt Nelly bootlegged whiskey at her farm Those country men would never do her harm. It was the only way Aunt Nelly could survive The cops were even known to come by and imbibe The sheriff looked the other way `Til the day Aunt Nelly died.
2.) Aunt Nelly had a baby Back in twenty-nine He never met no family But was a cousin of mine I would never meet him ‘Caused he drowned in thirty-two Uncle Bert just followed What could Aunt Nelly do?
CH) Aunt Nelly bootlegged whiskey at her farm Those country men would never do her harm. It was the only way Aunt Nelly could survive The cops were even known to come by and imbibe The sheriff looked the other way `Til the day Aunt Nelly died.
3.) I think the year was sixty-six When I looked up Aunt Nell Granny now was gone And Paw could go to hell I found a lovely woman Who greeted me and mine While men sat in the parlour Drinkin’ whiskey and wine.
BR) Aunt Nelly was a lady I have no doubt she hurt She ought not have been shut out Because she married Bert But Granny was a hypocrite And passed it on to Paw I wish I’d known her better My Aunt Nelly-in-law.
CH) Aunt Nelly bootlegged whiskey at her farm Those country men would never do her harm. It was the only way Aunt Nelly could survive The cops were even known to come by and imbibe The sheriff looked the other way `Til the day Aunt Nelly died.
Last edited by Annie Tennisco; 09/30/14 06:38 PM.
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This song dives into deep waters of the Underground near the end of the Prohibition Era. I will have to listening to the demo as it appears you have already put this to music. If not, I can imagine it as a throwback to a Carter family type sound as the era it is exploring at its beginning was during their heyday. I can vision it as intense without losing an edgy nuance.
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Thank you Calvin and beechnut,
O appreciate the comments.
A few changes. Anybody willing to check and advise?
Ihanks in advance
Annie
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Anne,
For some reason I hear this in my head as being played in a very somber slow rhythm similar to "Tallahassee Bridge". I think the verbiage is just right here and will make for an interesting piece. Look forward to hearing it!
Tom
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Hi Tom,
I had to refresh Tallahassee Bridge in my mind and sho` nuff, Nelly does fit that feeling. Yep, I can hear it!, but now need a melody for Nelly in that vein.
Thanks for the visit!
Annie
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Aunt Nelly © Annie
1.) Aunt Nelly was an outcast, To Granny, Paw and Maw She married Paw’s young brother Became fam-i-ly-in-law. Uncle Bert died by drownin’, In nineteen-thirty-four Nelly was even more alone Than she ever was before.
CH) Aunt Nelly bootlegged whiskey at her farm Those country men would never do her harm. It was the only way Aunt Nelly could survive The cops were even known to come by and imbibe The sheriff looked the other way `Til the day Aunt Nelly died. The chorus confused me because the whiskey or idea of the fact 1-she lived on a farm and made whiskey came out of no where...2, who the country men are and why the sheriff would look away is not clear. I think maybe in verse one you could take the last few lines and say something about how she had no skills, no one would hire her, had no transportation, whatever so to make ends meet so she bent the law. and who are the country men? are they men that worked on the farm with her or came for whiskey?
2.) Aunt Nelly had a baby Back in twenty-nine He never met no family But was a cousin of mine I would never meet him ‘Caused he drowned in thirty-two Uncle Bert just followed What could Aunt Nelly do? so she had two to drown?..though a nice addition to a story it then leads into the making of whiskey which leaves me asking why make whiskey and what does one have to do with the other.
CH) Aunt Nelly bootlegged whiskey at her farm Those country men would never do her harm. It was the only way Aunt Nelly could survive The cops were even known to come by and imbibe The sheriff looked the other way `Til the day Aunt Nelly died.
3.) I think the year was sixty-six When I looked up Aunt Nell Granny now was gone And Paw could go to hell I found a lovely woman Who greeted me and mine While men sat in the parlour Drinkin’ whiskey and wine.
BR) Aunt Nelly was a lady I have no doubt she hurt She ought not have been shut out Because she married Bert But Granny was a hypocrite And passed it on to Paw I wish I’d known her better My Aunt Nelly-in-law.
CH) Aunt Nelly bootlegged whiskey at her farm Those country men would never do her harm. It was the only way Aunt Nelly could survive The cops were even known to come by and imbibe The sheriff looked the other way `Til the day Aunt Nelly died. I think this could become a lovely song but feel it is kind of hard to keep up with, all the dates, the names, and then not hearing why she made whiskey or what it had to do with the tragedy in her life leaves me wanting more information. Best of luck on this. Kimberly
*Always open to collaborations on my lyrics.. with singers and musicians, but PLEASE contact me before putting work into one--in case someone else has it..thanks!!** BMI Member All Rights Reserved http://www.littleikepublishing.com Email for Song Business Only littleikeproductions@hotmail.com
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Aunt Nelly bootlegged to make money to survive. The country men are the ones who came to her house to drink and talk.
I set her up with a husband and son, but she was not a fortunate woman, being ostracized from the family.
The sheriff liked Aunt Nell, knew of her financial troubles, so 'looked the other way'.
does that help?
Annie
Last edited by Annie Tennisco; 10/01/14 01:11 PM.
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Yes it explains it but if it doesn't in the lyric and if one has to explain it outside the song then maybe a few small changes are needed. Or so I have been told on quite a few of mine before then for me it was always -welcome aboard on the bus to Re-Write City Hope this helps some Kimberly
*Always open to collaborations on my lyrics.. with singers and musicians, but PLEASE contact me before putting work into one--in case someone else has it..thanks!!** BMI Member All Rights Reserved http://www.littleikepublishing.com Email for Song Business Only littleikeproductions@hotmail.com
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Aunt Nelly was an outcast, To Granny, Paw and Maw BECAUSE She married Paw’s young brother AND Became fam-i-ly-in-law.
She ought not have been shut out Because she married Bert -------- Perhaps that says it clearly? .....that she was an outcast for marrying Bert.
Bootlegging whiskey was the 'only' way for her to make a living in those days, so she did that after losing her husband and son.
It's all there. The music will slow it down, as maybe you read it too fast?
Thanks Annie
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Aunt Nelly © Annee 1.) Aunt Nelly was an outcast, To Granny, Paw and Maw 'CAUSE She married Paw’s young brother- I think here you would need to say paw's brother Bert..because then when you later say Uncle Bert, I have to assume this is the guy she married but had to re-read it to even assume it..Became fam-i-ly-in-law. Uncle Bert died by drownin’, In nineteen-thirty-four Nelly was even more alone Than she ever was before. CH) Aunt Nelly bootlegged whiskey at her farm Those country men would never do her harm. It was the only way Aunt Nelly could survive The cops were even known to come by and imbibeThe sheriff looked the other way `Til the day Aunt Nelly died. 2.) Aunt Nelly had a baby Back in twenty-nine He never met no family But was a cousin of mine I would never meet him ‘Caused he drowned in thirty-two Uncle Bert just followed What could Aunt Nelly do?- I would try to put some of this information into verse one somehow because it sets up the story better as to why she had to make whiskey and the major loss of not just Bert but her son, then have maybe a little pre-chorus saying, how she had no education no way to make ends meet, but she learned through maybe watching Uncle Bert, or a grandpa the secret to good corn whiskey or the special ingredient her Bert put in his homemade whiskey, then go into the chorus, then we know why she made it, maybe if you wanna add the extra about how she learned, it could be from Bert or an old family recipe she learned from her grandpa? just suggestions.. so here is an example of maybe how to do verse one, keep or sweep as they say-- Aunt Nelly was an outcast, To Granny, Paw and Maw 'CAUSE She married Paw’s brother Bert Became fam-i-ly-in-law Uncle Bert died by drownin’, (may not even need to say UNCLE) trying to save their little boy broke her heart into a million pieces stole her happiness and killed her joy pre-chorus
She knew she had no education or family to speak of but she had grit and determination and her great grandpa's or Bert's secret recipe
[/color] CH) Aunt Nelly bootlegged whiskey at her farm- I feel the word bootlegged is not needed...I feel that just the word cooked or made the best corn whiskey behind the old barn on her farm, or something like that..to add a little color to it to...to help us picture her place more..as they call it in songwriting, putting more furniture in the room...maybe tell us more colorful things to put us there with her..to make us see in our minds eyes that farm, her making it..just a thought. Keep or sweepThose country men would never do her harm. still need to say who these country men are..if it was just the ones that came by to drink, it need to be explained or you could go a different route and maybe she had 3 homeless men that helped her for food and rent. she knew they'd never do her harm and maybe trusted them more than any kinfolk she had, I just feel like we need to know a little about who they were, and it also shows though she was treated badly by her kin, she still was charitable to others, by giving these men a place to stay.. then its clear who they are and does not imply that she had men visiting her which by the way you leave it open ended, one might wonder, why did men hang around, was it a sexual thing happening too, along with the drinking...but she felt they wouldn't really harm her... please note, if this is a true story I am not trying to imply anything bad about your family only saying the way it is stated, one might take it that way..[/cIt was the only way Aunt Nelly could survive- glad you added this back..The sheriff looked the other way `Til the day Aunt Nelly died. 3.) I think the year was sixty-six When I looked up Aunt Nell Granny now was gone And Paw could go to hell I found a lovely woman Who greeted me and mine While men sat in the parlour Drinkin’ whiskey and wine. BR) Aunt Nelly was a lady I have no doubt she hurt She ought not have been shut out Because she married Bert But Granny was a hypocrite And passed it on to Paw I wish I’d known her better My Aunt Nelly-in-law. CH) Aunt Nelly bootlegged whiskey at her farm Those country men would never do her harm. It was the only way Aunt Nelly could survive The cops were even known to come by and imbibeThe sheriff looked the other way `Til the day Aunt Nelly died. Aunt Nelly was an outcast, To Granny, Paw and Maw BECAUSE She married Paw’s young brother AND Became fam-i-ly-in-law.
She ought not have been shut out Because she married Bert -------- Perhaps that says it clearly? .....that she was an outcast for marrying Bert. I understood why she was an outcast but felt it was not clear enough for other reasons, the reason for making whiskey, maybe why they felt it was so wrong for her to marry Bert other than him being related or was he related....not sure...the family dynamics are a tiny bit confusing to me..
Bootlegging whiskey was the 'only' way for her to make a living in those days, so she did that after losing her husband and son. I get her son and husband died but it should say about the son and husband in first verse to tell more of the story then tell us maybe WHY it was the only way she could survive...because not ever widow make whiskey so this is why I said maybe say something about her not being educated or how she had no one else to turn to..as suggestions above.
It's all there. The music will slow it down, as maybe you read it too fast? Just telling you how I am, not everyone will be this way but I always read lyrics 2-3 times before I comment on them and go over it as detailed and dedicated as I can to make sure I am not missing something. I never skim over lyrics- especially if they interest me enough to wanna comment on them which yours did because I think you have a cool story here, just felt it needed a little more clarity. You are close to the story, especially if it is a true one, but you have to understand we are not privy to that information you already know. I hope this helps some:) Best of luck with it.
Thanks Annie
Last edited by KimberlyinNC; 10/02/14 04:12 PM.
*Always open to collaborations on my lyrics.. with singers and musicians, but PLEASE contact me before putting work into one--in case someone else has it..thanks!!** BMI Member All Rights Reserved http://www.littleikepublishing.com Email for Song Business Only littleikeproductions@hotmail.com
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Thanks Kim, I appreciate all your work in critiquing.
It is a true story and so much information that I wondered if I could make it into a song. To really understand, I see from what you say,it would be better to have the characters have personalities.
Cut down on the people? or what? It`s true so difficult to make false in an allotted time, so I will think on it.
Thanks again Annie
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