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It has been a while since I stopped in long enough to upload a song or even comment on one of yours, I apologize and will try to make it a commitment going forward.
I wrote this recently when I was to be going into the hospital and felt it was the right time to proclaim God's love and mercy to all. I hope you enjoy this or maybe come to reflect on its message a little for yourself.
Many blessings,
Skip

https://www.soundclick.com/html5/v4/player.cfm?songID=13789075

I’ve Got You Covered

1st verse
My love was without form or shape
Hollow & empty, desolate & bleak
Veiled in romance, incomplete
I chose you when I chose to create

Chorus 1
Come out of your darkness, rise up, rejoice
I thirst for your salvation Come and hear My voice!
You are My offspring, I am your Savior
Delight in me the Mighty Wind has you covered

2nd verse
My mercy was shaped on the cross
Faithful, righteous, displayed for all
Cloaked in mystique, mercies windfall
My lance pierced side gladly paid the cost

Chorus 2
Come out of your darkness, rise up, rejoice
I thirst for your salvation Come hear My voice!
I will forgive you as I Am your lover
Torrents of My Blood and Water shall have you covered

3rd verse
Love and mercy abounds above
With heavens great cloud of witnesses,
Resurrected from dark recesses,
Transfigured to My beloved

Chorus 3
Come out of your darkness, rise up, rejoice
I thirst for your salvation Come and hear My voice!
I am trustworthy, I will make all things new
In the beginning through the Great Amen
Now and forever I’ve got you covered

Outro
I’ve got you covered
Now and forever I’ve got you covered

Not really my cup of tea, but I have to say I found this really good, particularly the vocals and the ethereal, spiritual atmosphere you create. I wonder if it might not be a good idea to go even bigger on the final chorus, build to a climax. Maybe the addition of another instrument soaring over it?

I think those who look to music for spiritual inspiration will really enjoy this.

swestern,

Like Gavin, the spiritual theme of the lyrics is not something I gravitate to . . . but, the production on this one—really, every aspect, including that killer vocal—is just so well done. Magnetic to listen to. Agree with Gavin that you have an opportunity to take this up a notch in the last part of the song—build on the music to add some more instrumentation and back up vocals in that third chorus.

Kindest regards,

Deej

Hello Skip,


Wow------------------nicely done.


Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

Gavin / Deej
Thank you for listening in despite not getting into the subject matter, I appreciate that extra effort. I have gone back and listened and I think your suggestion to the final chorus has merit indeed. When this goes the next step, I will try to make those additions. It is making some rounds on Facebook so if the right person hears it, it may get revised sooner than later.
Thanks again,


Calvin,
Thank you for the high praise, especially from a veteran of these boards.
Skip

Skip,

I really like this spiritual song, not easy to have a slow ethereal song keep one's attention--you kept mine. I would like to see some more background choir perhaps later in song creating a stronger crescendo type build. One other sug, and its JMO, I'd like to see the first chorus utilize your "title" in the last line--"Ive got you covered." Here's why; for me I like the idea of establishing "early" that it is God talking to you without using the metaphor, as this makes it more personal right out of the gate! I'd keep the next metaphor "blood and water" however, as the listener will get that immediately and like/appreciate the metaphor contrasting the real literal original. Then ending choruses keep as is. JMO, use or lose.

I really enjoyed your write, and nice performance!

steady-eddie

Skip:

I somewhat agree with Eddie's "critique" of your song... but rated it highly. In today's secular world, works of a spiritual nature are often cast aside... but not this one. Brilliant write, meaningful and true... written as though "HE" is speaking to us. The vocal was pretty close to perfect and the backing melody gave it a Heavenly feel. Too many Christian themed writers are "a bit too much to be convincing." Not this one! May it serve it's purpose... and help to make our seemingly "out of control" world a better place.

Thank you. ----Dave

steady-eddie,
I think your suggestion on the last line of the first verse makes sense. Every time I listen to it, that line felt a little off somehow but I got stuck on an idea and didn't pursue it. I wanted the first verse to proclaim His love was present in the beginning; in Genesis. The second verse to proclaim His mercy while on the cross and the third verse to proclaim both, like in Revelation.
A couple other commenters also suggested the build up later in the song, so that idea has lots of merit also.

Dave,
Thanks for the high rating and the compliments; yes, the world could use a dose of God's love and mercy right now.


Thank you both for listening and commenting, it means a lot.
Skip