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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 68
Serious Contributor
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Serious Contributor
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 68 |
Hi Div.. Nice - think the perspective is fine - of course a baby wouldn't know what it doesn't know - that's one of the kind of endearing things about the song is the use of obviously adult words and thoughts - but bringing it right down to what's important to a baby - food and love! A little quibble on phrasing. I think I’ll say I like mom’s milk warmed. is a little awkward. (the I'll say is implied) you might substitute Mama's milk is good and warm. Similarly you might try replacing I’ll say mom and dad love me much. with My mom and dad love me so much. Just quibbles. Nice song for a Family day or folk festival type thing... --Doug ------------------ Doug Kolmar - Singer/songwriter http://bmind.home.mindspring.com/music/dkhome.htm
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Jan 25th, 2020
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