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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 2,704
Top 100 Poster
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Top 100 Poster
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 2,704 |
I've done another rough worktape with one of buddy Joe Ryan's lyrics... http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=11537215Something I Can't Do A cold December rain beating on my back door Wind howling like a stray dog in the night I pour myself another glass of loneliness Make believe that I can drink things right I know you're out there chasing rainbows Searching for the love we once knew Before these demons stole away my freedom And chained me to a life without you I remember Kisses in the morning Lovin every night Walking by the shoreline as The sun drops out of sight Promising forever I'd be there for you But now it seems forever Is just something I can’t do I swore to you that I could win this battle Another week or two and I'll be fine We can spend some time up in the mountains honey I can get things straight here in my mind. Time and time again I left you waiting A few more drinks to help me ease this pain Come home with a pocket full of stories And you're alone and crying once again I remember Kisses in the morning Lovin every night Walking by the shoreline as The sun drops out of sight Promising forever I'd be there for you But now it seems forever Is just something I can’t do Always knew that someday you'de be leaving Guess I never realized the cost The pleasure that I found inside that bottle Can't replace the love that I have lost Ah Kisses in the morning Lovin every night Walking by the shoreline as The sun drops out of sight Promising forever I'd be there for you But now it seems forever Is just something I can’t do Yeah it seems forever Is just something I can't do (C) Joe Ryan 2012/ All Right Reserved Sounds a little like Bruce-goes-to-Florida to me...and that's not a bad thing, The only real nits to pick are with the lyrics. The word just is totally unnecessary in the last line in the chorus. (I'm not one of those "never use the word just in a song" guys, but in this case, I'd say don't use it.) This part of the song... "I swore to you that I could win this battle Another week or two and I'll be fine We can spend some time up in the mountains honey I can get things straight here in my mind." ...has some issues with tense. Other than that...good stuff.
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