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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 329
Top 500 Poster
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Top 500 Poster
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 329 |
Hi B,I like the title/idea.but for me there are a lot of confusing lines, if he was so down and out how did he afford a room at the
Holiday inn, also I'd use the title hook as the last line of the chorus. kinda leave the listener in the Holiday inn,
I'd encourage you to not abandon this but to carry on changing it,
all the best,john
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Jan 25th, 2020
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