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Hi, Everyone!

The goal of our "Song Challenges" is to write songs/lyrics on demand within set parameters. We don't critique each other's songs in this thread (but you can say you like someone's song if you want to.) Please post your original works. If you have already written a song/lyric that fits within the parameters, please feel free to post it.

This challenge is to write to a song or lyric following a storyline. Here is the story: A person decides to leave his or her significant other, packs his or her own bags, leaves a "goodbye" note somewhere in the house for the other to find. However, the person has misgivings and decides to come back and is hoping the note has not been found yet because once read, it would definitely end the relationship. The person tries to get back home before the other does but doesn't make it in time.

Your challenge is to decide how it all turns out. Did the significant other read the note? Whether or not the note has been read, how are the packed bags going to be explained.

This needs to be written in First Person. You may use any song form or format you desire. You create your own hook. Good luck to you!
Hi Jean,

When I saw the challenge it encouraged me to try and write something.



I Guess You Missed The Boat

(c) 2011 Geneva Griffin

Verse 1
I listened to my heart, say words I couldn't hear,
I talked to myself, til I took down your picture,
We had a conversation, about that rock bent wheel,
That knocked you off the wagon, and how it made me feel..

Lift
Cause I'm word shy on whiskey deaf ears,
But the inkwell spells my feelings loud and clear..

Chorus
I guess you missed the boat,
It's time for me to sail,
Chance after chance,
I feel like hell,
Our love is on the rocks,
It's time for me to roll,
I guess you missed the boat..

Verse 2
My eyes swell blood red, as they well with pain,
Our years of memories, are streamin' down my face,
I touch my ring finger, then look back at the docks,
Luggin' these bags is easier, than carryin' this heavy heart..

Lift
If you try I'll navigate beside you all the way,
I never wanna write these words again..

Chorus
I guess you missed the boat,
It's time for me to sail,
Chance after chance,
I feel like hell,
Our love is on the rocks,
It's time for me to roll,
I guess you missed the boat..

Bridge
Baby the man in this picture, was bigger than the figure in that frame,
In his deep demention.. his every breath gave me strength..
He was taller than the shadow, he cast over the water,
Baby you won't drown in that bottle, together we can make a change,
..And I'll never have to say....

Chorus
I guess you missed the boat,
It's time for me to sail,
Chance after chance,
I feel like hell,
Our love is on the rocks,
It's time for me to roll,
I guess you missed the boat..

Our love is on the rocks,
It's time for me to roll,
I guess you missed the boat..
Posted By: glynda Re: Song Challenge #47 Story Song "The Note" - 05/29/11 11:34 AM
Geneva,

This is very good, some great lines in this, I hope you get music to it...

glyn
Posted By: glynda Re: Song Challenge #47 Story Song "The Note" - 05/29/11 11:43 AM
I have one started and will post it when I'm done
glyn
Hey Glynda,

I think the idea is that we write a new song about the specific theme. It's a creative challenge to see if you can write within a set of parameters to help you improve your writing skills. If you have time it would be great to see one on this theme.

James
Posted By: glynda Re: Song Challenge #47 Story Song "The Note" - 05/29/11 02:09 PM
Yes,this is true, but then in Jeans bottom line of her first paragraph...she says if you have already written one, you may use it...sorry, I deleeted mine...
This one slipped by me Jean, didn't see till today. Think my hook is kind of weak though.... crazy (progressive Chorus)

(c)2011 Lynn Orloff
Title ? (country/male vocal)

I left her a note on her dresser (nightstand)
And wondered when it would get read
When I crossed the state line or before that
Packed my clothes night before while she slept

Then I waited till she left for work and
I said my goodbye to the dog
Even fixed that ole leak in her bathroom
Took one last look around then took off

And the note read “hey baby I love you
And I hope I don’t cause any pain
But you knew all along I’m a rambler
And ramblin’ blood runs/flows through my veins”


Got as far as my Chevy tank took me
Stopped to fill up and have me a bite
Then her picture fell out of my wallet
And it cut me as sharp as a knife

And I thought to myself man I’m crazy
Spinning wheels going nowhere but fast
Yeah a rambler’s high sure makes ya’ feel good
But a good woman’s love’s gonna’ last

But the note said “hey baby I love you”
I’m sorry but I’m heading south”
Would she ever forgive me I wonder
There was only one way to find out


Well I flew on down that interstate pushing ninety-five
Thinking I could make it, but her car was in the drive…


But she never did find my goodbye note
Thank the good Lord it fell on the floor
And the suitcase I said my friend borrowed
I had taken my last ramblin’ tour
And I won't be a ramblin' no more
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