JPF Home Page Forums Thread Like Summary - Sing Me

Someone told me that the powers that be want short titles. Originally had the longer title, below, so I'd like feedback if you like the short or long title. Also, need feedback on the song. Is it too old style, too sentimental, etc? I studied classical guitar and you'll hear that influence. Thanks. Oh, I recorded on cheap software and a computer mike, so please, no feedback on the recording quality, as I'm aware that it's only of 'scratch demo' quality (not useable beyond showing others your basic idea).


https://soundcloud.com/patricklockwood/singme/s-qMLI4eJD5sF


Sing Me That Same Old Country Song



Over there on the wall is your guitar hangin' lonely.
I cannot help but recall that first moment I heard you singing.

So sing me that same old country song;
The mem'ry of that time lingers on.

And a sour note's begun to ring and it's tearing us apart.
So let's make each new moment be like the first one from the start.

Now sing me that same old country song;
The mem'ry of that time linger's on.

Somehow our love's been lost,
so bring that music you played for me.
Let's rebuild the bridge we've crossed;
bring back that sweet love song you sang for me

Honey you've such a way and with your word's you've touched us all,
and it's been such a long time I've heard you sing that song.

So sing me that same old country song;
The mem'ry of that time lingers on.

Somehow our love's been lost;
so bring that music you played for me.
Let's renew the bridge we've crossed;
bring back that sweet love song you sang for me.

Sing me that same old country song
Why don't you sing me that same old country song?

The term 'Short titles' comment probably imply whoever said it expects a short title to be a 'strong' Hook, THE Hook, the few words that sum up what the whole Song is about, easily Repeated a minimum of three times, and ideally more.
'Strong' in the sense of memorability. Driving home that idea in the first hearing, having them singing along, voluntarily or involuntary ear-worming in their heads.

I think I'd flip the Chorus:
Now sing me that same old country song;
The mem'ry of that time linger's on.

The mem'ry of that time lingers on.
Now sing me that Same Old Country Song;

The halting delivery of the words probably doesn't work, dragging the Song out to a four minute space. Radio likes short Songs that leave more time for commercial ads that pay the bills. Upping the tempo and perhaps deleting some of the Stanzas could work.

A 'Refrain-Type Chorus', ending each Verse, is a Structure that works. I think that's the Structure here, as opposed to a 'Stanza-Type Chorus', one comprised of multiple Lines and standing on its own as a Stanza like the Stanzas of the Verses.

"Same Old Country Song" Copyright Pat Hardy

(Verse I)
Over there on the wall is your guitar hangin' lonely.
I cannot help but recall that first moment I heard you singing.
(Chorus Refrain)
The mem'ry of that time lingers on.
So sing me that Same Old Country Song.

(Verse II)
A sour note's begun to ring and it's tearing us apart.
So let's make each new moment be like the first one from the start.
The mem'ry of that time lingers on.
So sing me that Same Old Country Song.

(Bridge) (The Bridge Melody should differ from that of the Verse/Chorus-Refrain. The variation renews listener interest/attention.)
Somehow our love's been lost,
so bring that music you played for me.
Let's rebuild the bridge we've crossed;
bring back that sweet love song you sang for me

(Verse III)
Honey you've such a way and with your word's you've touched us all,
and it's been such a long time I've heard you sing that song.
The mem'ry of that time lingers on.
So sing me that Same Old Country Song.

(This Repeat of what I identify as a Bridge would be the one to delete, shortening the Song.)
Somehow our love's been lost;
so bring that music you played for me.
Let's renew the bridge we've crossed;
bring back that sweet love song you sang for me.

(Coda) (The Coda can Repeat the title, THE Hook, driving it home as THE gist, the main idea, making it memorable.)
Sing me that Same Old Country Song
Why don't you sing me that Same Old Country Song?

Hi Pat
I did enjoy your song but feel as Gary commented it needs cutting for broadcasting purposes, if you decided on this approach of course.
I also like his chorus suggestion as well.
A folky type of song to my ears
Best of luck with it
Travis

Not a country type so I dunno, but I like the flip suggestion and waltzing it up to pull back on that 4.5 minute length.

It will take away from your playing which is a lot of the song and adds that folk element mentioned

Thanks for sharing this. I liked what you did with minimum equipment.

That IMO makes a song either work or not. Production can be lipstick on a pig if the song has no lyric or structure and such.

So thumbs up and play with it to see how much further you can\want to take it

I like your voice a lot...it has a gentleness and the subtle harmonies sound so good...the simple instrumentation suits it nicely....as a pro dancer I can tell you you can really only dance a country waltz to it...it is in 3/4 time as is...I think the tempo goes a little off a couple of times but it is 3/4 time.. well done Pat

Steve

Pat,

Sweet and simple. I lot to like here for sure. From the wonderful guitar playing to the sentimental well written lyric. I enjoyed this very much!

Tom