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Let me know what you think! Thanks all.....
Listen here at soundcloud !
http://soundcloud.com/homelesstom/just-because

JUST BECAUSE


I kissed my mother on the cheek
When I left home at seventeen
I jumped a Greyhound to L.A.
Blue Ridge Texas seemed a world away
Nobody cares who you are
Youíre just another kid with a cheap guitar
Thatís just the way it was
Ainít nobodys fault, it was just because

Been called white trash but I had style
Doiní what I shouldnít, puttiní on the miles
Liviní was hard but I was liviní free
Still Iím nowhere near the place I thought Iíd be
My vagabond heart wonít let me stay
It takes me further up that lost highway
I know a manís judged by what he does
Ainít nobodys fault, itís just because

Most men marry and settle down
But I ainít one to hang around
I know a manís judged by what he does
Ainít nobodys fault itís just because

The days and nights all seem the same
You reconcile your dreams with what they became
The only star up in my sky
Is the one overhead on the Texaco sign
Iíll keep moviní til I canít no more
Til I find what is I been lookní for
I ainít nobody I never was
Ainít nobodys fault itís just because

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Welcome to JPF Tom,

This is really good stuff. Love the lyric and the arrangement is sweet. Only thing missing is a bassline to give it some bottom end. Still sounds good as is though.

Stevie


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Tom,

Sounding good! Reminds me of The Weary Kind. A few lines would sing better if they were a bit less wordy.

Nice job.


Colin

I try to critique as if you mean business.....

http://colinwardmusic.com/

http://rosewoodcreekband.com/


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Hi Tom,

Welcome to JPF! This is the 1st song I've heard from you and since I'm not sure what you're looking for as far a critique I'll just write whatever pops in my head while I listen. smile

Thatís just the way it was
Ainít nobodys fault, it was just because I expected you to tell us why since you say it was because. smile

Been called white trash but I had style
Doiní what I shouldnít, puttiní on the miles
Liviní was hard but I was liviní free
Still Iím nowhere near the place where I thought Iíd be I just thing that would sing smoother.
My vagabond heart wonít let me stay I like vagabond heart but I think if you could come up with something we haven't heard before it would be better.
It takes me further up that lost highway Same with lost highway.
I know a manís judged by what he does
Ainít nobodys fault, itís just because

I think it would be very cool if you had a chorus that explained what it was because of. smile

I love this!
The only star up in my sky
Is the one overhead on the Texaco sign

Again I think it sounds good, you have a nice voice easy to listen to. smile

Dottie

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Hi Tom ,
First of all , thanks for sharing .

I really enjoyed the listening and performance .

All the best
Jan


"You have to react to what's around you in the moment, whatever the music is.
Just think of it as some place you have to enter and you need to find the key."

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TOM--

WELCOME--

I LIKE THE IDEA OF THIS ONE--

I OFFER MY TAKE IN CAPS FOR OPTIONS: PARRED SOME CHANGED SOME FOR MEANING AND METER--USE OR LOSE!


JUST BECAUSE


I kissed mama on HER cheek
When I left home at seventeen
I CAUGHT THE Greyhound HEADINí WEST.
ALL Texas TOWNS LOOK LIKE THE REST
WHERE nobody careS who you are
Just another kid with HIS cheap guitar
PLAYING FOR TIPS IN SMALL DANCE HALLS
Ainít nobodys fault, itís just because

Been called white trash but I STILL SMILE
LEARNINí TO LIVE, EACH HIGHWAY mile
TIMES ARE hard but IíM STILL free
I WANT MY NAME ON THE MARQUEE
My RESTLESS heart wonít let me stay
LIFE TAKES ME DOWN the lost highway
WANT BRIGHT LIGHTS AND LOUD APPLAUSE
Ainít nobodys fault, itís just because

Most men marry and settle down
But IíM NOT one to hang around
A MAN IS GAGED by THINGS he does
Ainít nobodys fault, itís just because
Ainít nobodys fault, itís just because


The days and nights all seem the same
Had A BAD dream I CANíT EXPLAIN
The only star up in my sky
Is one ABOVE the Texaco sign
Iíll keep TRAVELINíUNTIL I DROP
MAYBE ONE DAY IíLL BE ON TOP
STILL ainít nobody I never was
Ainít nobodys fault itís just because

Most men marry and settle down
But IíM NOT one to hang around
A MAN IS GAGED by THINGS he does
Ainít nobodys fault, itís just because
Ainít nobodys fault, itís just because
ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖitís just because.


Mackie

Last edited by Mackie H.; 04/24/12 08:11 PM.
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I'm listening to this for the 3rd time, which is a good thing...love the lyrics, the music and the vocals...and how funny, I'm not far from Blue Ridge Texas...I'm in Princeton...


glyn

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Enjoyed the listen. Brought back Simon and Garfunkel. Of course, you are not really homeless, are you?
Jim Colyer

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Nice guitar and keys etc..just add bottom and drums and finee !!

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Thanks Stevie.....yer awesome! I appreciate the kind words.

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Thanks Darrell...I was performing this live acoustically and just threw it down I'll play around with a bass...wuddaya think of Cello?

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Wow..Simon and Garfunkel...thanks Jim for checkin' it out. Not homeless...this year. LOL....

Last edited by Homeless Tom; 04/25/12 10:33 PM.
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Wow glynda...how cool you know where Blue Ridge is....i have family there. And Dumas......thanks for the listen, and kind words.

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Thanks so much Jan. I appreciate it.

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Hi Colin....ya know...I heard that one line in the "Weary Kind". Do you think I should change it? I decided to keep it in there as I was already performing it. Thanks so much for listening.

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Mackie, and Dottie. Thanks so much for the lyrical suggestions. I'll play around with it some. I'm so used to singing it this way, I just ran with it. I have been refered to as "wordy" from time to time by people. LOL...thanks so much for taking the time to listen! You RULE!

p.s. Mackie...i love the lyrical ideas you presented to me. I started playing around a bit, but then wondered if the song was really about a guy lamenting the fact he wasn't a star. It really is more about a guy looking back, and thinking he might have screwed up in general over the years. not so much about not becoming a name up on the marquee. it really changed the direction of the song to me I think, although they're awesome ideas......

Last edited by Homeless Tom; 05/04/12 03:40 PM.
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Hi, Homeless Tom,

I like this a lot. This is a show opener or ender. A "this is who I am" kinda anthem song, and it reminds of the kind of thing that Townes Van Zandt coulda written, in his prime. This feels like the real deal, to me. smile

There are no wasted words or lines. It all paints a picture of a man with mixed emotions about where he came to be, in life, and a man who has held on to his dignity, despite not living up to his own expectations, or those of others...this self-effacing kinda material is difficult to write, without coming off maudlin, or giving away "too much" --with this kinda song, details may be less important than "the big picture."

I know a manís judged by what he does
Ainít nobodys fault, itís just because


There's so much emotion, stoically hidden behind these lines.
That's why this song is so powerful; the palpable restraint, in what the singer chooses to say, and to make me feel that restraint. That's a rare gift. BRAVO!!!

Mike

Last edited by Michael Zaneski; 04/26/12 02:56 PM.

Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
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Michael, thank you so much. This review just made my day. I think every songwriter wants to connect with the listener in this way. I appreciate you giving me a listen, thanks again!

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Hey Tom,
I enjoyed the listen! Tweaks below, keep or sweep smile


The days and nights all seem the same
You reconcile your dreams with what they became
The only star up in my sky
Is the one above me on the Texaco sign (seems to flow better)
Iíll keep moviní til I canít no more
Til I find what my heart's been lookní for
I ainít nobody I never was
Ainít nobodys fault itís just because


ďI usually start with a title or maybe a little rhyme or phrase.Ē - Harlan Howard

Co-writing = Compromise!


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Hi Tom,

Nice to meet ya & WELCOME to JPF !

This is a cool song & a cool performance too.
and I really like this part a lot....

The only star up in my sky
Is the one overhead on the Texaco sign


The song has a very soothing sound.

Have a good day.


Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

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Welcome Tom
Outstanding work.
Beautiful arrangement and the vocals and harmonies are spot on.

The Uke or Mandolin in the bridge was a pleasant surprise.


enjoyed the listen






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Really liked the lyric and vocal on this. Great music. A few lines are a bit rushed, I'd trim them, but overall a really nice song!

Tammy


http://tammyjann.com/
https://soundcloud.com/tamsnumber4
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default.cfm?bandID=1038504

Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic. Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it...
Professor Albus Dumbledore




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ABsolutely beautiful and haunting song. Loved the minor chords and the way your vocal made the most of them. Lyrically some of the best and freshest lines I've heard in awhile. Like others I agree that the heart and soul of this piece is the couplet: "I know a man's judged by what he does, ain't nobody's fault it's just because."

Like Calvin I also really loved the Texaco line. That's just truly awesome writing using a familiar thing that we instantly call to mind to convey an incredibly sad but extremely poignant message.

I have nothing but praise for this piece. Your guitar work was excellent and carried the lyric perfectly, providing just the right atmosphere for the words but never intruding. Your vocal was also very good and despite the fact that a couple of lines were a little rushed I believe that it made the song more real. Too much polish is not always a good thing.

Outstanding work Homeless T. Get it out there and make it happen.

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Thanks so much Nelson!

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Wow Bobby, I'm really floored.....thank you so very much.

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Everything here is awesome!I love the lyric and the music.The truth be sung!

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Cool song!

Peace!


Spellin? whats that? like magick or sumpin? ;\)

http://foggymind.com
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Thanks Michael...i've gotten so much positive feedback on this tune I'm like floatin' ten feet off the ground! LOL....

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Thanks for given me a listen David!!!

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Hey Tom...I didn't have the time to read the other posts but two things stuck out for me...the word "reconcile" just felt outta place for me and I was really wanting to hear "because" fleshed out a bit more.

Just MHO.

Nice work though...

Larry


Can't find the stairway to 'heaven'...but I know where the elevator is.

Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us" - Albert Schweitzer.
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Pleasure to listen to all the way through Tom.
Star quality.
Vic


It's never too late? Yes it is, so do it now.

If, given time, a monkey can write the complete works of Shakespeare maybe there's hope for me.

http://store.cdbaby.com/cd/vicarnold2

http://www.soundclick.com/vicarnold

http://soundcloud.com/vic-arnold

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Thanks Vicarn.....and thanks Larry.....i'm tryin' to work through the wordiness of some of my tunes. thanks for takin't he time to gimmie a listen guys....

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Great song, just awesome. I love "The only star up in my sky, is the one overhead on the Texaco sign..." and the "I know a man's judged by what he does..." line. This is a guy that's not blaming anyone for how his life turned out. The acoustic guitar is beautiful on this one, and the sparse arrangement really adds to the forlorn feel of the song. Could be a hit!

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Thanks BonB....really appreciate the feedback...


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