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Joined: Aug 2002
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I visited the Vancouver Art Gallery a few weeks ago, saw a quotation on the wall, proceeded to click a picture, was stopped by the guard. I wrote this short song based on the quotation. http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_songInfo.cfm?bandID=28328&songID=10389669Not Sorry For Being Me © March 9, 2011 Stan Loh Verse 1 Oh the raindrops winding down a leaf, To the earth a huge sigh of relief, Like my tears that won’t numb a shameless thief, Who stole the soul that I haven’t got, All the pain that silence brought, Oh the scars from battles fought, Lay the blame on me, How I don’t agree, I’m not sorry for being me, For I don’t know how to be anything else, can’t you see? Verse 2 Now the acid eating up my guts, There’s revenge waiting in disgust, Ever willing to crush a newborn crust, Oh my fortitude needs more latitude, Building fences for an attitude, All my thoughts become unglued, Lay the blame on me, How I don’t agree, I’m not sorry for being me, For I don’t know how to be anything else, can’t you see?
Last edited by Stan Loh; 03/31/11 04:49 AM.
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Thanks Calvin ... it was fun doing it ... didn't take too long!
Stan
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Stan, I like it alot...are you gonna add more to it....if so, can't wait...glyn
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Hey Glynda ...
I thought long and hard about adding another verse, but I think all that has to be said on this topic has already been said. Don't you agree?
Thanks Glyn.
Stan
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Hi Stan, I really like the message and the unique way you described his shortcomings and his acceptance of it all. The only thing I would consider is a short intermission of lovely guitar to break up the verses a bit more. Maybe even humming the tune along with it...??
Good luck on this lovely piece
Kim
*Always open to collaborations on my lyrics.. with singers and musicians, but PLEASE contact me before putting work into one--in case someone else has it..thanks!!** BMI Member All Rights Reserved http://www.littleikepublishing.com Email for Song Business Only littleikeproductions@hotmail.com
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Hello Kimberly...nice to see you. Actually what you suggested would be good. The recording of this production started with me singing live with my guitar. I sent it to Neal for his critique, and without telling me he added the other bass and electric guitar tracks. Then I added the cello track to finish it.
Thanks for listening.
Stan
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Joined: May 2010
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Stan,
I love the music for this, I've listened to it three times already, I love the write on it. My first thought was like Kim's, a small instrumental break or the addition of a chorus that is short and repetitive like "I can only be me" with some great music, just to space out the verses, if you listen, you go from the beautiful first verse (which I love) to the harder second verse and I could see music in there that takes us musically from one verse and prepares us for the other...just my opinion.
Tammy
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Joined: Dec 2010
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Hi Stan! what a wonderful song, I like the space feeling in your voice Nice piece of music!
Tom/
Life is worth nothing without the music
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Hi Tammy ... I really like your suggestion which really indicates an addition of a bridge or chorus. Hmmm...I will think hard on that one, then I'll have to conscript Neal Gilbertson to work with me on another iteration.
Thanks so much,
Stan
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Joined: Jun 2005
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Stan the melody is very good...nice range. I thought the tempo was slow but when all is done, it worked.To encourage audience participation, orally or aurally, a repeating chorus would be nice.
The lyric is a little too poetic...I think given the title, a more conversational lyric would be more intimate. More as one might might think.
Hope this helps...definitely would be worth trying a few changes to explore how it would come out. We all want to be accepted for who we are, so the theme is universal.
Last edited by Neil Cotton; 03/24/11 11:06 PM.
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Hey Tommy ...
Thanks for the props! I know you have helped me a lot!
Stan
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Very well done Stan. Really enjoyed the production and vocals. Is that you? Kim had a great idea, she usually does, and I agree it just might help fill in the missing parts. Douglas
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Neil ... thanks for your feedback...yes, a rewrite is going to happen.
Doug ... looks like you're echoing Kimberly's suggestion as well. Thanks!
Thanks all...I am certainly going to revise this piece. At least I am happy it went to this level.
Stan
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A great write Stan.
The music arrangement while short, was damn good.
You are a wonderful musician, my friend.
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Thank you Nelson.
As we are writing, a revision of the song is going on! Please come back and listen to the new version.
Stan
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Hi guys thanks for the critique. This is now redone with a musical interlude done by my good friend Neal Gilbertson! Please have a listen and give us your opinions!
Thanks again,
Stan
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I didnt hear the first song Stan. I just heard this one, and I do like it very very much.
I've heard a few of your songs and sounds so smooth and flows really well.
Lay the blame on me, How I don’t agree, I’m not sorry for being me, For I don’t know how to be anything else, can’t you see?
really nice listen, leaning back in my chair with eyes closed.
God Bless Roy and Helen
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Roy ...
Thanks so much for the lovely reception for this song!
Your opinion is much appreciated.
Stan
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Stan,
This just made me so happy, that music that bridges the journey from the first to the second lyric makes all of the differnce and I think it sounds wonderful, what a beautiful song!!
Tammy
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Tammy ... thanks for this reaction.
I thought about using your suggested line..."I can only be me" ... but then I got lazy!
I still think it's a very good suggestion which may one day be done!
Thanks so much!
Stan
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