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#871466 - 01/15/11 06:51 PM "Climax" -- 1/21 edit (Outro Added)  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
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EDIT 1/21:

Took Nigel's idea for Bridge, and parlayed it into an Outro. Thinking this part should be slowed down even more, and the tone should be "cautionary tale-esque".... That make any sense???

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

EDIT 1/19: Yeah, it really ISN'T "explicit" per se. ANYHOO, a couple of tweaks for your consideration. Especially wanted to incorporate the one stop light detail....

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


Hi Boys and Girls,

Recently, on Scott C's. "Youngstown Calling" thread ( http://www.jpfolks.com/forum/ubbthreads.php/ubb/showflat/Number/868168/page/1#Post868168 ) , Kimberly made the following observation:

I wish I could write about my hometown, but not sure a one stop light town called Climax would do for a good song...

Needless to say, this inspired a few ideas. Following is our standard blues retort wink : Thanks again Kimberly!!

"Climax" - REV. 1/19 REV. 1/21
(c) 2010 Beth G. Williams & Ricki E. Bellos

I'm going to Climax, Baby
Said you'll meet me there
Going to Climax, Baby
Said you'll meet me there
Know it's hard to get away
But don't back out, if you care

You'll love the ROAD to Climax >>>>>>>> what do you think about CLIMB to Climax?
Sit back, enjoy the ride
Love the ROAD to Climax
Sit back, enjoy the ride
NO WORRIES 'BOUT THAT STOP LIGHT
IT'S GREEN MOST OF THE TIME


O Babe, I'm getting closer
Reaching Climax soon
Babe I'm getting closer
Reaching Climax soon
Your relief's around the corner
It's time to shoot the moon

So glad we came together
You know just what to do
Glad we came together
You know just what to do
Sometimes I come alone, but
Climax is always better with you

OUTRO:
They tell me some have never been
While others just pretend
First time, last time, or in between
To Climax is the end


Ricki does have some musical thoughts on it, but we thought it would be fun...since so many people were sort of involved in this...to see if anyone else is moved to musicate it. smile

Regardless, hope you enjoyed it. Personally, I'm thinking ROAD TRIP wink ....

Beth

Last edited by Beth G. Williams; 01/22/11 01:55 AM.

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#871467 - 01/15/11 06:59 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Beth G. Williams]  
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Hi Beth,

I'll be one of the first to come to this 'Climax', hope you won't draw bad conclusions about my ... ahem, speed wink

Love this, any idea to who's gonna sing it? I'd say Polly AND Joe would be a lovely duet.

Cheers,
Yann

Last edited by yann; 01/15/11 07:00 PM.

"Honey, I know, I know, I know times are changin' / It's time we all reach out 4 something new" (Prince)

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#871469 - 01/15/11 07:07 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Beth G. Williams]  
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"Tampa Stan" Good (D) Offline
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HiDee Mz O & Mz Spicerack!

This'n' brings-to-mind one Graham Henderson penned a-while-back, on Intercourse (PA)..heh! (& I've been often-tempted to pen one about Toad Suck..I saw on a Sign..Somewhere West-of-The-Rockies...);-)>

Here come Da Sugs:
V1: "But please HURRY if you care"

V2: "Cause our hearts on Cruise-Control/
Ahead, there's not an-y Stop-Signs!

Last V. Last Line:
"Climax is MULTIPLE..With you~!"

KOS Sweet LadyChums/Love it whenyas talk Dirty..heh-heh!

Good Luck with a Fun One! Best Wishes/Big Hugs,
Stan


#871474 - 01/15/11 07:35 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: yann]  
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Originally Posted by yann
Hi Beth,

I'll be one of the first to come to this 'Climax', hope you won't draw bad conclusions about my ... ahem, speed wink

Love this, any idea to who's gonna sing it? I'd say Polly AND Joe would be a lovely duet.

Cheers,
Yann


Hey there Yann!

While certainly in some circles, your coming early might be an issue, as far as I'm concerned, as long as you enjoyed yourself, more power to you smile . In fact, let me add "come one come all!" wink (I think I smell a SEQUEL wink ).....

Gosh, I am SOOO going to get in trouble with this one... bite blush

Anyhoo, regarding musication/singing, we haven't had any takers yet, but we're surely open to suggestions.

In the meantime, merci beaucoup smile ........

Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#871477 - 01/15/11 07:44 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: "Tampa Stan" Good (D)]  
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Ha! Nicely done ladies smile

I kinda like:

But don't back out Baby, don't you dare

a little better. Might not sing as well though.....

Would also be cool to work in the one stop light somehow (the light being green of course) but might not be possible.

In any case, I'm really liking this.

If Ricki does a guitar vocal worktape using her ideas - I'd be willing to try a backing track. I would also be perfectly happy to step aside if a more musically inclined member was willing. See if anyone steps up.

I find that I keep looking for double entendres in what I've typed. LOL - think I got rid of them all grin

Scott

#871482 - 01/15/11 08:10 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Scott Campbell]  
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Ok Bethie..per your request...I will say it here online...on the way to the one stop light "town" of climax is High Point and HorneyTown...no kidding.
blush
now, I can not imagine what this lyric will end up being now...lol
eek laugh
Kim


*Always open to collaborations on my lyrics.. with singers and musicians, but PLEASE contact me before putting work into one--in case someone else has it..thanks!!**
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#871496 - 01/15/11 09:14 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: "Tampa Stan" Good (D)]  
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Originally Posted by "Tampa Stan" Good
HiDee Mz O & Mz Spicerack!

This'n' brings-to-mind one Graham Henderson penned a-while-back, on Intercourse (PA)..heh! (& I've been often-tempted to pen one about Toad Suck..I saw on a Sign..Somewhere West-of-The-Rockies...);-)>

Here come Da Sugs:
V1: "But please HURRY if you care"

V2: "Cause our hearts on Cruise-Control/
Ahead, there's not an-y Stop-Signs!

Last V. Last Line:
"Climax is MULTIPLE..With you~!"

KOS Sweet LadyChums/Love it whenyas talk Dirty..heh-heh!

Good Luck with a Fun One! Best Wishes/Big Hugs,
Stan


Hey Ampersand Man,

Why am I not surprised to see you here? wink

Anyhoo, thanks so much for coming, and for offering up your dandy suggs. I'm sorta partial to the "don't back out" reference in V1, but I do think the idea of including the one stop sign/light reference is a good one.

As for the "multiple" CLIMAX one...I'm not sure I want to put that sort of pressure on him wink ....

In the meantime, stay tuned to see how this develops Stan. We surely appreciate your feedback smile .

xoxo,
Jackie


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#871507 - 01/15/11 09:55 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: KimberlyinNC]  
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Originally Posted by Kimberlyinnc
Ok Bethie..per your request...I will say it here online...on the way to the one stop light "town" of climax is High Point and HorneyTown...no kidding.
blush
now, I can not imagine what this lyric will end up being now...lol
eek laugh
Kim


I can NOT believe this - this gets better and better grin

Where IS this place, anyway grin

Scott

#871709 - 01/16/11 04:13 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Scott Campbell]  
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Originally Posted by Scott Campbell
Ha! Nicely done ladies smile

I kinda like:

But don't back out Baby, don't you dare

a little better. Might not sing as well though.....

Would also be cool to work in the one stop light somehow (the light being green of course) but might not be possible.

In any case, I'm really liking this.

If Ricki does a guitar vocal worktape using her ideas - I'd be willing to try a backing track. I would also be perfectly happy to step aside if a more musically inclined member was willing. See if anyone steps up.

I find that I keep looking for double entendres in what I've typed. LOL - think I got rid of them all grin

Scott

Hey Scooter,

Thanks for stopping by on this one. Considering you were indirectly involved in its inception, I'm glad you got a kick out of it. Needless to say, it was a lot of fun to see what we could come up with wink . There were so many plays on word available -- I was all about the HOMECOMING wink -- but thought that might be better saved for the sequel.

I liked the "back out" line too, and agree on the need to include that stop light somewhere.

Thanks a bunch, too, for your offer about the backing track grin . I'll have to confer with Ms. Bellos about her intentions, since she's such a wily one, but I think she'll agree that would be awesome!

As to your avoidance of all double entendres, I think you made out okay. I'm not sure though if the suggestion "if anyone steps UP" might somehow disqualify you wink .

Regardless, thanks for your feedback smile .

Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#871714 - 01/16/11 04:28 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Beth G. Williams]  
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Hey Beth and Ricki...

I'd like to offer some insight but I feel a little withdrawn at the moment....

Larry


Can't find the stairway to 'heaven'...but I know where the elevator is.

Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us" - Albert Schweitzer.
#871716 - 01/16/11 04:38 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: in2piano]  
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It's ok for you that live in the USA.
Us UK folks have to come a long way to get to Climax.
Vic


It's never too late? Yes it is, so do it now.

If, given time, a monkey can write the complete works of Shakespeare maybe there's hope for me.

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#871731 - 01/16/11 05:42 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Vicarn]  
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Hey Beth,

LOL… Well, now that we know it's on the map we all know how to get there! Kim may find herself with a lot of company. smile

Very cute song!

Dottie

#871733 - 01/16/11 05:47 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Dottie]  
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My, oh my. I'm sure that this in-yer-face lyric will go down well with many people. smile


Steve Cooke
Stockton-on-Tees, UK
http://wwww.soundcloud.com/stevecooke
#871770 - 01/16/11 08:39 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Steve Cooke]  
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Beth and Kim,

This is real cute, love to hear it!

Geneva

#871800 - 01/17/11 12:15 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: nightengale]  
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Hi Beth, Hi Ricki,

I can imagine the fun you two had creating this little one….lol.

I am speechless. But let me try to say something….you’re very adventurous and I don’t know your intended market for this song, but it surely garners attention! I think it’s so funny that there are towns with those names. I had heard of the one in Pennsylvania that Stan mentioned but not these! Maybe theme song? grin

Good luck with it! Will be curious to hear it!

Kristi


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if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself. What a man can be,
he must be. -- Abraham Maslow, American Psychologist
#871813 - 01/17/11 01:26 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Kristi McKeever]  
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I imagine that this song is likely to do well in the French town of Condom.

[Linked Image]


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Stockton-on-Tees, UK
http://wwww.soundcloud.com/stevecooke
#871865 - 01/17/11 09:13 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Steve Cooke]  
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Hi girls,

FUN lyric !
one little nit from me..I wanted it to say...

You'll love the ROAD way to Climax


Calvin

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

#871871 - 01/17/11 11:09 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Calvin]  
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What a fun idea and well written.

Of course I would love to go there, but would worry about getting lost and ending up in the backwards.. oops sorry meant backwoods.

I will follow this cause Its so good.

God Bless Roy and Helen


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#871897 - 01/17/11 01:17 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Roy Cooper]  
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Hi Beth. Your structure on this lyric leads me to believe that musically this shall be a blues song. The tempo needs to be slow or else the song will seem to end prematurely - and no one wants that. I see a need for a musical bridge after the "It's time to shoot the moon" line. Otherwise, you're moving along well with this one.

#871929 - 01/17/11 03:17 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: KimberlyinNC]  
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Originally Posted by Kimberlyinnc
Ok Bethie..per your request...I will say it here online...on the way to the one stop light "town" of climax is High Point and HorneyTown...no kidding.
blush
now, I can not imagine what this lyric will end up being now...lol
eek laugh
Kim

Good Morning Kimberly,

I'm sorry I have been remiss in attending to this thread -- spent yesterday in the hospital, another bout of dehydration and apparently a new diagnosis to add to my mix--hyperventilation syndrome. Oh well. Now they want me to walk around with some halter-monitor for my heart, meet with a cardiologist, blah blah blah. Anyway...

SO, I'm glad you're enjoying Ricki's and my lyrical take on your hometown. Also happy you posted all of the available experiences close to Climax. I don't supposed there's a "Snuggle" nearby, after you've reached Climax?

Seriously, thanks again for the inspiration. Stay tuned for more....

xoxo,
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#871930 - 01/17/11 03:18 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Scott Campbell]  
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Originally Posted by Scott Campbell
Originally Posted by Kimberlyinnc
Ok Bethie..per your request...I will say it here online...on the way to the one stop light "town" of climax is High Point and HorneyTown...no kidding.
blush
now, I can not imagine what this lyric will end up being now...lol
eek laugh
Kim


I can NOT believe this - this gets better and better grin

Where IS this place, anyway grin

Scott


No kidding, huh? I bet everyone calls in late for work there....


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#871931 - 01/17/11 03:20 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: in2piano]  
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Originally Posted by in2piano
Hey Beth and Ricki...

I'd like to offer some insight but I feel a little withdrawn at the moment....

Larry

Hey Larry,

No worries...you just take your time smile . Sorta reminds me of the "scared turtle" episode on Seinfeld....

Thanks for playing along,
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#871932 - 01/17/11 03:22 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Vicarn]  
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Originally Posted by Vicarn
It's ok for you that live in the USA.
Us UK folks have to come a long way to get to Climax.
Vic


Maybe so Vicarn. But I suspect it's worth the trip wink .... I understand the Tour Guides are very receptive smile ....

Enjoy!
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#871935 - 01/17/11 03:30 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Beth G. Williams]  
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Sorry, I'm married.


Thanks for stopping by
#871946 - 01/17/11 03:57 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: robert wynn]  
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Are you sure it's on the map? some people are having trouble finding it wink

May I offer you a bridge?

They tell me some have never been
While others just pretend
I like to go there often
With or without my friend


wink

Incidentally I would hotly dispute that this is an explicit lyric - it's not, it's just a play on words. Climax is an everyday word in everyday usage and perfectly acceptable.

#871954 - 01/17/11 04:13 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Dottie]  
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Originally Posted by Dottie
Hey Beth,

LOL… Well, now that we know it's on the map we all know how to get there! Kim may find herself with a lot of company. smile

Very cute song!

Dottie

Hey Dottie,

Very true! I'm wondering if the zip code is 06969 or something like that wink ....

Either way, the founding father's of this little town must have been very popular smile .

Glad you enjoyed the road trip ....

Cheers,
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#871965 - 01/17/11 05:43 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Beth G. Williams]  
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Good one, Ladies!

Now I do agree wholeheartedly with Nigel that these are NOT explicit lyrics. Explicit means everything is spelled out in graphic detail. Everything you've got here is nicely nuanced. Suggestive - but definitely not explicit!

I would take a look particularly at the last line of each verse. It seems to lack a consistent flow/meter. I would really work to tighten that up! wink Seriously. I would.

And I love Nigel's bridge suggestion and really hope you use it!

~Bubbles

#871970 - 01/17/11 05:52 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Beth G. Williams]  
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Just wanted to say that I enjoyed this one and could see the fun you gals had in writing it.

Great piece of work!

Doug


"Is this a practice? They are all practices." John Denver

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#872029 - 01/17/11 09:17 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Douglas Murphy]  
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Mackie H.  Offline
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NASHVILLE, TN
YOUALL--

Headin' down the road feelin' good LORD, LORD--Headin' down that ROAD--Squeelin' TIRES and Makin' TRACKS Down to CLIMAX--

LOVE, LOVE IT--

TEMPS RISING-----

Mackie

#872043 - 01/17/11 10:11 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Nigel Quin]  
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KimberlyinNC Offline
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KimberlyinNC  Offline
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North Carolina
Originally Posted by Nigel Quin
Are you sure it's on the map? some people are having trouble finding it wink

May I offer you a bridge?

They tell me some have never been
While others just pretend
I like to go there often
With or without my friend


wink

Incidentally I would hotly dispute that this is an explicit lyric - it's not, it's just a play on words. Climax is an everyday word in everyday usage and perfectly acceptable.


having trouble finding it, ain't that the truth...it is a one stop light place...blink and ya miss it.. laugh

what is funny is that it is the most boring little town...LOL...

Kim

Last edited by Kimberlyinnc; 01/17/11 10:11 PM.

*Always open to collaborations on my lyrics.. with singers and musicians, but PLEASE contact me before putting work into one--in case someone else has it..thanks!!**
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#872057 - 01/17/11 11:23 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Steve Cooke]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Originally Posted by Steve Cooke
My, oh my. I'm sure that this in-yer-face lyric will go down well with many people. smile


I think the JPF audience is enjoying it so far wink .

Hope we can count you in that number.... smile

Thanks for the visit Steve!

Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872063 - 01/17/11 11:39 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: nightengale]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
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Originally Posted by nightengale
Beth and Kim,

This is real cute, love to hear it!

Geneva

Thanks Geneva. Stay tuned for whatever musication comes from this wink ....

Cheers,
Beth

P.S... Actually, Ricki Bellos is my co-writer on this number. Naughty Kimberly simply pointed us in the right direction wink ...


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872420 - 01/19/11 08:21 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Kristi McKeever]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
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Originally Posted by Kristi McKeever
Hi Beth, Hi Ricki,

I can imagine the fun you two had creating this little one….lol.

I am speechless. But let me try to say something….you’re very adventurous and I don’t know your intended market for this song, but it surely garners attention! I think it’s so funny that there are towns with those names. I had heard of the one in Pennsylvania that Stan mentioned but not these! Maybe theme song? grin

Good luck with it! Will be curious to hear it!

Kristi


Hey Kristi,

First off, let me apologize for the delay in getting back to folks on this thread....just some medical issues keeping me busy I'm afraid.

Anyway, YOU are SPEECHLESS? I find that hard to believe. Though it does make me giggle, imagining your response to this lyric.

Musically, not sure what's happening. Ricki was flirting with an idea for it, Scott has been generous to offer a backing track if we can pull it all together....so I guess the best I can say is STAY TUNED!

Thanks so much for your visit and fun feedback. smile

Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872421 - 01/19/11 08:22 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Steve Cooke]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Originally Posted by Steve Cooke
I imagine that this song is likely to do well in the French town of Condom.

[Linked Image]


I think you're right. Lots of coming and going over there too I bet wink ....

Thanks for the visual aid,
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872424 - 01/19/11 08:27 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Calvin]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Originally Posted by Calvin
Hi girls,

FUN lyric !
one little nit from me..I wanted it to say...

You'll love the ROAD way to Climax


Calvin

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart


Hi Nivlac,

I kinda thought you might like this one smile . In fact, maybe it's where your "Calvin's Cast of Characters" live (or at least vacation wink )....!

Anyway, I think your nit is a valid one. I had toyed with "road" too, but thought it might be too literal at the time; now I am leaning back that way again, with your help.

So thanks for checking this out and for your input. It's much appreciated.

Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872431 - 01/19/11 09:55 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Roy Cooper]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Massachusetts
Originally Posted by Roy Cooper
What a fun idea and well written.

Of course I would love to go there, but would worry about getting lost and ending up in the backwards.. oops sorry meant backwoods.

I will follow this cause Its so good.

God Bless Roy and Helen

Hi Roy,

Thanks so much for the THUMBS up on this one wink . Ricki and I sure had a a lot of fun working on it (if you call that working wink ).

BTW, I wouldn't worry too much about getting lost en route to Climax. There are signs all over the place, telling you where to go smile .

Thank you again for your visit... and stay tuned...
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872958 - 01/22/11 12:41 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: summeoyo]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Massachusetts
Originally Posted by summeoyo
Hi Beth. Your structure on this lyric leads me to believe that musically this shall be a blues song. The tempo needs to be slow or else the song will seem to end prematurely - and no one wants that. I see a need for a musical bridge after the "It's time to shoot the moon" line. Otherwise, you're moving along well with this one.


Hi there summeoyo,

I apologize for the lateness getting back to you and the others on this thread. Some family medical matters are keeping me distracted I'm afraid....but I still wanted to acknowledge you all for the feedback thus far.

So to that, yes, we were shooting for a blues-type vibe. We'll be mindful of the pace, as we surely don't want anything happening prematurely wink .

Thank you for your input and your support. Stay tuned....

Beth

P.S. Given current circumstances, not sure I have the wherewithal to fairly do any crits at the moment. Please permit me just this effort to respond to everyone here, thanks.

Last edited by Beth G. Williams; 01/22/11 12:47 AM.

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872960 - 01/22/11 12:42 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: robert wynn]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Originally Posted by robert wynn
Sorry, I'm married.


No worries....though I do understand it's a very open-minded community... smile

Thanks anyway,
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872961 - 01/22/11 12:46 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Nigel Quin]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Massachusetts
Originally Posted by Nigel Quin
Are you sure it's on the map? some people are having trouble finding it wink

May I offer you a bridge?

They tell me some have never been
While others just pretend
I like to go there often
With or without my friend


wink

Incidentally I would hotly dispute that this is an explicit lyric - it's not, it's just a play on words. Climax is an everyday word in everyday usage and perfectly acceptable.


Hi Nige,

Thank you so much for taking the time to listen and offer such thoughtful feedback.

I actually concur with your non-explicit assessment of the lyric, and have made the change accordingly in my subject line.

As for a bridge, I hadn't thought one necessary at the outset, but I certainly like your suggestion. Let me run it by HRH Ricki, and we'll certainly keep it in mind as we proceed.

Hope all's well across The Pond.
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872963 - 01/22/11 12:59 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Beth G. Williams]  
Joined: Apr 2008
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Ricki E. Bellos Offline
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Ricki E. Bellos  Offline
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Wisconsin
Hi All,

Sorry, I've been MIA on this one. I left Beth to handle all the responses because, well, because she's so good at it! smile I have to say, I had a verse and the music in my head within the first few minutes of Kimberly's mention of her home town. Beth took that and just ran amuck so, she really did all the heavy lifting (and breathing). I have a feeling there will be changes, additions and subtractions before it's ready for music but until then, feel free to continue giving us your thoughts and suggestions. The really hard part will be singing it without cracking up! Thanks again,

Ricki

#872977 - 01/22/11 01:34 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: bubblingsoul]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Massachusetts
Originally Posted by bubblingsoul
Good one, Ladies!

Now I do agree wholeheartedly with Nigel that these are NOT explicit lyrics. Explicit means everything is spelled out in graphic detail. Everything you've got here is nicely nuanced. Suggestive - but definitely not explicit!

I would take a look particularly at the last line of each verse. It seems to lack a consistent flow/meter. I would really work to tighten that up! wink Seriously. I would.

And I love Nigel's bridge suggestion and really hope you use it!

~Bubbles

Hi there Bubbles,

Thank you too for the clarification on the mis-qualified "explicit" nature of this lyric. I think "naughty-ish" would have sufficed.

I do appreciate the comments about the timing on the last lines of the verses. I think with a certain amount of syncopation they could time out nicely, but much of that will be determined when Ricki sings it. Regardless, we'll for sure take another look at them to see if we can make it any easier.

Playing around with Nigel's Bridge idea too. Glad you support it.

Thanks again for your welcome and helpful feedback.

Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872979 - 01/22/11 01:36 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Douglas Murphy]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Massachusetts
Originally Posted by Doug Dude
Just wanted to say that I enjoyed this one and could see the fun you gals had in writing it.

Great piece of work!

Doug

Hi Doug,

Nice to see you, it's been a while!

So thank you for taking the time to peek at this one for us. Yup, we had ourselves some fun with it -- and I don't think the good times are finished yet!

Have a nice weekend,
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872980 - 01/22/11 01:39 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Mackie H.]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Posts: 7,386
Massachusetts
Originally Posted by Mackie H.
YOUALL--

Headin' down the road feelin' good LORD, LORD--Headin' down that ROAD--Squeelin' TIRES and Makin' TRACKS Down to CLIMAX--

LOVE, LOVE IT--

TEMPS RISING-----

Mackie

Heya Mackie,

I'm thinking you've made this trip before?? wink

Thanks for the visit and the smile smile ....
Beth


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#872981 - 01/22/11 01:41 AM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: KimberlyinNC]  
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Beth G. Williams Offline
Beth G. Williams  Offline

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Massachusetts
Originally Posted by Kimberlyinnc
Originally Posted by Nigel Quin
Are you sure it's on the map? some people are having trouble finding it wink

May I offer you a bridge?

They tell me some have never been
While others just pretend
I like to go there often
With or without my friend


wink

Incidentally I would hotly dispute that this is an explicit lyric - it's not, it's just a play on words. Climax is an everyday word in everyday usage and perfectly acceptable.


having trouble finding it, ain't that the truth...it is a one stop light place...blink and ya miss it.. laugh

what is funny is that it is the most boring little town...LOL...
Kim


Maybe they shoulda called it AntiClimax then....

xoxo


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=949237

http://www.myspace.com/goldencatfish

"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
#873123 - 01/22/11 04:10 PM Re: "Climax" -- Explicit Lyric, Thanks To Kimberly ;) [Re: Beth G. Williams]  
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KimberlyinNC Offline
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KimberlyinNC  Offline
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North Carolina
Beth. me? naughty? Not me!! blush smirk wink


here is another sign of interest


http://greensboring.com/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=5125

~K


*Always open to collaborations on my lyrics.. with singers and musicians, but PLEASE contact me before putting work into one--in case someone else has it..thanks!!**
BMI Member All Rights Reserved
http://www.littleikepublishing.com
Email for Song Business Only
littleikeproductions@hotmail.com
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