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Joined: Feb 2009
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Nadia Offline OP
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Hello. Sorry I've been doing so much lately and although I was looking on forums, I wasn't posting for ages !I've recently signed up to 50/90 and I've posted one of my true life stories. I'm very keen to know of your suggestions please. Thank you smile

"Sorry, Little Brother"
© 2010 by Nadia Cripps

My little brother used to sing
He'd sing and sing the whole day long
I used to say: "stop your singing"
But he wouldn't stop, no, he wouldn't stop.

I'd tell my mum that I want him to stop
And my mum would say to him:
"She doesn't want it, please don't sing now"
But he wouldn't stop, no, he wouldn't stop.

I would then say to him:
"Stop your singing, please stop"
And he would say: "oh, you don't like my singing?"
"No, I don't" - I would reply

"I see", he'd say, "that means I need to sing more
I need to practice to make it sound nice"
"No", I'd reply, "you've got me wrong, I like your singing"
I'd say anything to make him stop, just didn't want him to sing, that's all

"Oh, that's good", he'd reply,
"That means I sing well, I'll sing more then"
Oh, no, not again
Please stop this singing, please stop.

My little brother, I'm so sorry
That I was so mean to you then
I thought and thought about it
And one day I came to see you and I said:

"Sorry, Bob that when we were little
I was saying to you
That I didn't like your singing
That wasn't nice at all"

And he replied:
"Oh, that's okay, my big sister
That's okay
Shall I sing to you now?"

I'm so glad that little me didn't wake up
And I didn't say: "Oh, no, not again"
And I didn't say "no, please don't sing, please don't sing"
Instead I said: "yes, I'd like that"

And he sang to me a beautiful song
I've never heard it before
"It's my little song I'm singing to my daughter",
He added with a smile.

It was so nice to hear him singing
And now I'm going back home
And his song is following me
Whenever I go

But what do I hear?
There is a family walking behind me
A little boy started to sing
And his big brother is saying:

"Please stop this singing now,
Please stop"
Oh, how I'd like to tell a big boy
Please don't say it to your little brother

And I feel sorry for a little brother
Who has just stopped his singing
And I feel sorry for a big brother
Who will be sorry when he grows up

Let's all sing
Singing is nice, singing brings us together
Let's all sing and be happy
Sing, little brother, sing!




Nadia
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I think it is an interesting, well written little story. I enjoyed reading it.

I would find someone to draw pictures to it and make it a children's book (with an accompanying song, also!).

Kevin


"Good science comes in peer reviewed journals. Conspiracy theories come in YouTube videos. "
Kevin @ bandcamp: Crows Say Vee-Eh (and Kevin @50/90 2019)
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Nadia Offline OP
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Thank you very much Kevin, so glad you liked it. Your idea is very interesting smile


Nadia
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Kevin's suggestion is great. It flows like a short children's story. Not sure how I feel about it as a song for the adult market, but if it was done for children, I think it'd be great.


Kate <3

– "The strongest drive is not love or hate. It is one person's need to correct/modify/alter/edit/change/rewrite another's copy."
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I believe it can be a success for both the children's and adult market. There have been several predecessor such as "Doggie in the Window" and "Puff, the Magic Dragon."

Did your brother become a professional singer. Most pros get there by singing a lot as children, I believe. Michael Jackson became a star when he was just ten. There had to have been a lot of singing in that household. Good luck with this one.

Peace,
Brian

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Nadia Offline OP
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Thank you very much Kitty, I'm so happy you like my little story smile

Thank you very much Brian, my story was written for children and adults in mind. I think it is not uncommon for the children to have arguments when they grow and many of adults have a similar story happened to them. My brother didn't become a professional singer but we both became professional musicians, both are teaching the piano. Thank you so much for your kind wishes. I really appreciate your reply smile


Nadia

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