JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback Lyric Feedback Forum 3 Nellie Tanner...music link

Hi Folks..

So many of you asked to hear the music for this that our dear Amelia Rose offered to host it on her site for awhile so you could have a listen. The link below will take you directly there. Your feedback will be gratefully appreciated.

http://ameliarosemusic.com/music-18.html

Nellie Tanner 2:40
© 2005 lyrics by Bobbie Gallup ASCAP
Music/vocals Rachel Kerr
Arrangement/Production by James "Billy" Kerr

She wore simple cotton dresses
Her hair was streaked with gray
And I 'member Nellie Tanner
Like it was yesterday
She canned the sweetest peaches
The good Lord ever made
We'd talk for hours on her front porch
Sippin' our ice cold lemonade

CHORUS:
I was just a scrawny no-count
White trash country kid
That nobody ever cared about
Like that blessed woman did

She read stories from the Good Book
Tears shining in her eyes
She’d answer all my questions
And never seem surprised
She lived what she believed in
Until the day she died
The time Miss Nellie spent with me
Man... I was the luckiest kid alive

CHORUS: (Repeat)

BRIDGE:
She was just a sharecropper's daughter
But he brought her up proper
To love Jesus and the land
She'd sing as she picked cotton
In that dry dusty delta bottom
And Miss Nellie was my first real friend

CHORUS: (repeat)

So don’t let nobody tell you
you can’t change the world
Cause Miss Nellie, she done changed the life
Of this one little backwoods girl

CHORUS: repeat

Hello,
That gal sings it pretty good.. but I was hoping we could hear a version geared in the direction say Dolly Parton could/would take it in.

I got in my head Dolly could make this song stand out! Make it memorable.. make it valuable!

S.L.

Hi Girls

seems like a rough demo to me, as it stands singer gets hung up on last line of the chorus...needs fixing....otherwise nice words/nice singing...melody somewhat reminiscent of "Me and Bobbie McGee" might just be me, probably is....

Hi Sharpe,

Yeah...though it's a bit difficult to get Dolly to do demos these days. Dolly could maybe take this to a hit...but we will have to hope she can hear herself inside the music. If she gets this and wants to change the arrangement, that will sure be up to her...we would be honored if she wanted to do this. She could probably relate to the subject matter.

Thanks so much for taking a listen and for sharing your thoughts.

Bobbie

Howdy Ritt,

Not sure what song you were listening to or if you were on lo-fi..but Rachel definitely doesn't get hung up anywhere in this...as smooth a delivery as a baby's butt. I can only listen with my modem connection and even with that connection to the link, there were no glitches in the delivery. I do have the MP3 to compare it to, however, but can't hear anything that is even remotely a glitch. Thanks for taking time to listen but I'd love to know what is it that you are hearing that seems off?

Bobbie

Hi Guys,

My thanks also for taking a listen here. Just so that you know, I am a little out of genre here, Country is not my forte nor my husband's.

S.L. - I too am hearing a Dolly Parton version or even a Reba or Lee Ann Womack in terms of the vocals. I am the composer but I don't really have the kind of voice that I think this song needs. It needs someone with a bright sounding soprano, a nasal twang and a fast vibrato. That is a voice quite unique to Country. Also why I have no aspirations of singing this myself! We are awaiting some professional feedback to see what our next step is with this.

Ritt - I really must listen to Me and Bobby McGee, I honestly do not remember how that goes. As far as the last line of the chorus is concerned, I was 2 syllables short based on where the melody naturally resolved and I tried some 'word stretching' instead of adding the syllables. Again based on feedback we will decide how to move forward with this one.

My thanks also to Amelia for allowing us to post this song for some much appreciated feedback.

Best,
Rachel

really nice song here gals. Just heard about the twins so double congrats to you Miss Rachel. I love the lyrics and I think y'all have a winner. Rachel...your voice is truly
haunting. I love it...
T

Hi Tony,

Thanks for the lovely compliment about my voice and glad you enjoyed the song. Bobbie wrote a great lyric here and I tried my best to do it justice with the music.

Yes, my twin boys will be 7 months on the weekend and it is amazing that I am able to get anything done musically. In a way, I have never been so organised in my life, it is how I survive from day to day. Having them is a life changing experience but there is so much joy involved that I am really grateful.

Thanks for taking a listen and for your feedback.

Best,
Rachel

Hi Ria,

Sounds great!

Now if you want to make the chorus smoother and stronger and sung exactly as you have done. . .

try this: (and I know it will work)

CHORUS:
I was just a scrawny
No-count country kid
No_body ever cared about
Like that blessed woman did

Stretch scrawny out a little.
White trash wound up sounding squeezed in the delivery and it doesn't really reinforce the core emotion after all. . . and EVERYTHING in the chorus has to count.

Leaving "that" off was deliberate.

Like someone saying:
"She was just a scrawny, no-count kid nobody cared about !."

A hillbilly wouldn't use "that" in there.

The two "no" sounds can be worked to the melody's benefit too.

------------------
Terry


[This message has been edited by Tall_Terry (edited 05-31-2005).]

Howdy Tony,

Thanks so much for the listen and feedback. I agree, I think Rachel has a terrific voice and it is a great complement to the lyric...at least the way I envisioned the music being done. Like you..I can't imagine how she gets ANY music done these days, what with the boys going through teething and all! Whew!!

Hugs,
Bobbie

Hi Tall One...

As always...your suggestions are certainly appreciated and will receive due consideration from both of us. If we decide to use those changes, we will be sure to thank you profusely. If we don't...I hope you won't be devastated. We have to go with what works best for us. Thank you so much!

Hugs,
Bobbie

Hi Bobbie, Rachel. I enjoyed this one. The lyrics are solid, and the choice of melody really bring it to life

Good arrangement, fine vocals.

As far as Dolly, Reba, and Lee Ann...I can't quite hear them doing it justice. I'd just as soon hear this version. Kate Campbell may be a good choice to pitch it to. ....or Laurie Lewis.

It reads like a folk song, and Rachel, you sang it that way. Any folk festival audience should love it.

Just my opinion, but if you get rid of those drums and electric bass, and do it with a standup bass and a mandolin.... Yea buddy !

Anyhow thanks for sharing, it's a good'n

Tony

Nice song ladies! Great lyrics, music
and singing.

Diane

Hello Bobbie, Rachel, & Billy,

Very impressive.
Keep sing, your voice is beautiful.

Calvin

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewartmusic.htm

Hi Tall T

Thanks for the listen and your recommendations, part of my problem is that I don't have an American accent let alone a Southern one! That does affect how words sound when sung. Based on all recommendations we will see what happens next but know that your input is valued as always.

Best,
Rachel

Hi Tony W,

Funny you should peg this one as folk, I kept asking Bobbie, is it country enough even without the 'Country vocals'. Me I am clueless and have to leave it to the more experienced judgement of others. That said, the mark of a well written song is that it can be done a number of ways, sometimes what will sound best really only depends on the listener.

Glad you liked it though,
Best

Rachel

PS. Although my husband's musical talents are great, a stand up bass and mandolin would be stretching them!

Diane and Calvin,

Thanks for the listen and we are really glad you enjoyed the song.

Best,
Rachel

Nice song. Good luck with this. Excellent story.
Take care,
Lloyd

Only nit I could find was the second last line of the bridge...I'd drop the "dry" and keep it at

She'd sing as she picked cotton
In that dusty delta bottom
And Miss Nellie was my first real friend

And nice work Rachel. BTW are the twins your first? That's got to be magic

Ciao

Hello,
It's me again...

Seems to me there would be enough people following [interested in] this project.. that they would take it upon themselves to showcase their abilities.. especially at taking a lyric that has not yet achieved its full potential in sound yet.. and say let me show them how this should sound as say bluegrass, or folk, or Dolly style country, {think in the style of coat of many colors}

And I mean do it good enough [over the top enough!] Where everyone starts to think OMG! Where is the purchase button? I want everyone I know to hear this! I have to have a copy now! Not an unsatisfactory mp3 copy either. [meaning that I can listen to an mp3 sample well enough to know whether I wish to hit the purchase button or not... but that doesn't mean I want to spend the rest of my life listening to an mp3 sample... it means I want to pay for a quality cd that will last a lifetime with excellent sound qualities...]

Did I lose anyone with that articulation?

But on the other hand if some outfit starts asking for front money to do this.. they will turn everyone off as though they are sharking the situation.

So tell me am I thinking too much again? Or does it make sense what all I'm getting at... S.L.

I had the same thought as John's re. "dry" -- in case it takes two to effect the change.

------------------
Terry

Hi John,

Yes, the twins are my first, and very possibly my last also! There is magic but also A LOT of work involved dealing with 2 at the same age.

Actually, my husband did ask me how I sang that line in the bridge, wasn't easy to get all those syllables in. Will try it without DRY and see.

Tall T - your voice is always heard with or without company!

Best,
Rachel

Great job, ladies!! Ria the vocal is BEAUTIFUL. I love your voice--I can see some of the "folky" tendency referred to, but I think you can "see" the country past it in a pitch...That said, I've gathered from various posts that Bobbie has developed a pretty good network on "the Row"--If she had a shot to pitch to a particular artist(or their producer), then I could see spending a couple $'s on a vocal that imitates that "style"...The songs' waaay good enough, so if you have already discussed a concern, then it's a small investment to not risk missing the "hear" on such a great tune--JMO--By the way, Ria(Rachel?), I've recently had an attack of "Inner Chick", and will be looking for a female lead...I don't play, but usually pretty complete song in my head when done--"Too Much Lost" is very new & maybe 2 writes away, but I'd love your opinion of potential on it--Post or E-me; I'd be honored--Al in Florida

Wow! This is good, guys! Rachel, take a bow! Your voice is beautiful.

------------------
"Shoot for the moon, and even if you miss, you will land among the stars." -- Les Brown
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/8/triciabakermusic.htm

Hi Lloyd and Tricia,

So glad you checked out the song and enjoyed it. I am overwhelmed by all the nice compliments about my voice.

Thank you again,

Rachel

Hi Al,

I would be happy to take a listen to anything you would like me to just send it to me at rjekir@gmail.com.

Thanks for the kudos on this song. We are hoping that Nashville can hear the Country in it, if not we will have to hire a more 'Country' sounding singer along the lines of Dolly for the demo. Investing in the song at that point would be no problem. Glad you think it is good enough, we certainly hope so.

I like guys who admit to having an inner chick!

Best,
Rachel


PS. Al, calling me Rachel is fine. I registered with a pseudonym (Ria)but can't bring myself to sign my posts with anything other than my real name.

[This message has been edited by Ria (edited 05-31-2005).]

HI S.L.,

Me thinks you think too much! LOL. This is a preliminary demo, primarily for feedback so we can fix anything that needs fixing BEFORE we spend any money on it if that's what it needs.

The point of a demo is to suggest the potential of the song and on that basis I think we have succeeded. Producing a Master for sale is beyond us at the moment as this is primarily for pitching to artists who hopefully will hear the potential and produce such a version as you are alluding to that may inspire a lot of people to buy their album. That we should be so lucky would be AMAZING. We will try to do right by this one though. Thanks for your your continued interest in it.

Best,
Rachel

Bobby & Amelia,

Nice melody...I enjoyed it.

Stan

Hi Stan,

Just a tiny correction, Amelia is graciously hosting the song for Bobbie and myself since we have nowhere to post it at the moment. I am the composer and singer and am really glad you like it.

Best,
Rachel

First of all, the title caught my eye weeks ago...

For your sake though, I hope the "powers that be" can "hear" a different sound to this. You/one would think that they can..For example, I can hear a rock song and turn it into a bluegrass number. But, from what I have heard, a lot of people who are the decision makers around N'ville cannot do this..Just baffles the mind.

I understand that this is just a rough demo, but with this understanding, it still doesn't do anything for me. The bridge part, melodically, seemed to be all over the place and and the timing in places threw me, and I also feel that the chorus is too short.

I think the lyric has potential. Like I said, love the title..and I like these "old type" story songs. Best of luck with it, you two.


[This message has been edited by qbaum (edited 06-01-2005).]

[This message has been edited by qbaum (edited 06-01-2005).]

Beautiful voice, Rachel! This is the first I've heard it, so it's a nice treat to hear you.

Could just be me, but I think that the chorus melody is running in double-time from where it should be. If the chorus is only going to be two lines, I think it needs to balance the weight of the chorus by having 8 bars to work with, instead of 4. Otherwise it sounds like a parenthetical thought that's thrown in to interrupt the story.

I like some of the suggestions on wording that will cut down on the rushed feeling in some of the lines. "White trash Country" has a lot of consonants to it, especially at the speed you're singing it now.

I'm always erring on the side of slower, but I think the whole thing could drop a little in speed to give it more of a reminiscent sound and less of a bounce. That's just personal preference.

It's good to hear this realized with music!

-- James

[This message has been edited by JamesM (edited 06-01-2005).]

Originally posted by Bobbie Gallup:
Hi Folks..

So many of you asked to hear the music for this that our dear Amelia Rose offered to host it on her site for awhile so you could have a listen. The link below will take you directly there. Your feedback will be gratefully appreciated.

http://ameliarosemusic.com/music-18.html

Nellie Tanner 2:40
© 2005 lyrics by Bobbie Gallup ASCAP
Music/vocals Rachel Kerr
Arrangement/Production by James "Billy" Kerr

She wore simple cotton dresses
Her hair was streaked with gray

Sets the mood/tone of the song with a sense of simplicity.

And I 'member Nellie Tanner
Like it was yesterday

Everyone remembers what they want to.. what is important to someone may be important enough to share...

She canned the sweetest peaches
The good Lord ever made

The small things in life can be over the top.. something people who have had the red carpet treatment all of their lives might not comprehend...

We'd talk for hours on her front porch
Sippin' our ice cold lemonade

A time before TV/internet/radios and air conditioning.. people would socialize on the front porch in the evenings as the sun went down...

CHORUS:
I was just a scrawny no-count
White trash country kid

Implies that the singer/storyteller began life in [extremely?] humble circumstances.. most certainly something the country/folk listeners of yesteryears could relate to..

That nobody ever cared about
Like that blessed woman did

How many children in this world feel totally uncared for? How many American children feel like that no one cares if they should live or die.. suffer or not?

She read stories from the Good Book
Tears shining in her eyes

To me good book alludes to the bible. To the bible-haters it may allude to some other book they have fond memories of.

She’d answer all my questions
And never seem surprised

Children are full of questions.. they believe someone can tell them the meaning of life and living and other questions of the universe.

She lived what she believed in
Until the day she died

Nellie Tanner lived what she preached. It wasn't "do as I say not as I do" type thinking...

The time Miss Nellie spent with me
Man... I was the luckiest kid alive

We never know in society who the people are that will make a positive difference in a childs life.

CHORUS: (Repeat)

BRIDGE:
She was just a sharecropper's daughter
But he brought her up proper

Like I had pointed out before.. there are somethings in this world that are priceless. Money can buy a lot of things.. yet there are some things a ton of money can not buy.

To love Jesus and the land
She'd sing as she picked cotton

Strongly suggests Nellie was/is a devout Christian.. struggling to make a living picking cotton.

In that dry dusty delta bottom
And Miss Nellie was my first real friend

The writer has a strong sense that when children have best friends it doesn't always have to be someone their own age...

CHORUS: (repeat)

So don’t let nobody tell you
you can’t change the world

Most definitely a segment that is over the top.. every person in the world has the [subtle?] power to make a difference in the world.

Cause Miss Nellie, she done changed the life
Of this one little backwoods girl

The singer has gone on to bigger and better things with a strong sense of being someone.

CHORUS: repeat



Bobbie and Rachel,
Hope you all do not mind me analyzing your song. Great job with what you all have so far.. don't allow anyone to knock you down.. keep those chins up!

Thought it would help for an outsider [me] with no vested interest in the song.. to describe what is so great about it.

Also before the whackers and choppers start saying well change this.. water that down change the meaning of that...

Thanks, S.L.

Send the lynch mob to a sunny so cali beach cause…. that’s where I’ll be headin if the gloom clears up!.

I just had to step in when I heard talk about demoing and pitching. I really think you folks have to completely re-think this .First off. I haven’t heard anything remotely similar on country radio for at least…30 years and highly doubt they are going to go back in time..especially that time!!(biggest Carpenter freak on the planet here btw)

This has a Snowbird or Top of the World vibe without the strong melody. It’s not Rachel’s voice …which is good…or her lack of a country accent…..it’s the song.

First off and easily remedied is the band in a box style arrangement. I’d drop it before I’d play this to anyone in Nashville. Simple piano and vox should work much better .The tempo is way to fast. I'd drop it below 100 I’m guestimating around 70 –90 BPM.

It lacks a chorus. I have heard zero recent Nashville songs…. unless they are VVBV standard style…. that don’t have a chorus. I’d turn the chorus into a pre chorus. .... As James ponted out the balance is off .Also lyricaly it doesn’t function strongly as a chorus either.

There aren’t repeat motif’s for the listener to hang onto…..which makes it sound like a pre. Without a title in it buries it even deeper. I really don’t think Nellie Tanner is going to work as the chorus hook unless you really work it..I could hear the real title being after the name in the chorus but not having a memorable title line sinks this for radio play.

BP

Hi Shelia,

Thanks for taking the time to listen and for your feedback, your input is appreciated.

Best,
Rachel

[This message has been edited by Ria (edited 06-01-2005).]

Hi James,

Thanks for the listen and the compliment on my voice, I am somewhat out of my comfort zone here as I do a lot of Jazz, Adult contemporary, Cont. Christian and some Reggae vocals but I am loving the opportunity to branch out now that I have found myself some country co-writers!

Bobbie indicated that she wanted this to go up tempo Country because that was what the market is after now. I played around with the tempo and this is about the fastest that I could sing it and sound okay. I am also guilty of loving the slow stuff so I made a special effort to kick it up a notch. The chorus couldn't work at half time, what could probably happen is the whole song could be slowed a bit, that really depends on what kind of feedback we get overall. It is by no means cast in stone. I think what you are feeling here is that the verse is 8 lines and the chorus is 4, somehow it is usually the other way around especially in mid to up tempo songs. I tried to stay as close as possible to Bobbie's original lyric and her personal preference for the music.

Your comments are certainly appreciated as everything helps shape the final product.

Best,
Rachel

LOL And other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play? I mighta known you'd come around here raisin' havoc, Butch. I can recognize your rants anywhere. We do appreciate your perspective, believe me. However, this one seems to be creating its own buzz here in Nashvegas, so I guess we will just ride the horse till it drops before we make any serious changes. If no one picks it up or if we get some consistent feedback from the insiders that it needs to go a different direction, we will certainly take that under advisement.

BTW...the arrangement isn't done with BIB. While it may vaguely be reminiscent of some of the Carpenter's stylings, I'm not hearing what you are hearing in this. Rachel comes from a background in jazz and R&B, so this is a new direction for her but I think she captures the spirit of country rather well.

Kind regards,
Bobbie



[This message has been edited by Bobbie Gallup (edited 06-01-2005).]

Sorry to have missed you in the mix, Sharpe...thank you ever so much for the thoughtful analysis of these lyrics. You certainly didn't miss many of the nuances I tried build into this one. Not every song will speak to everyone. That is just the reality of music...but we are both pleased that this one moved you. Thank you for sharing your insights with us and other readers here.

Sincerely,
Bobbie

Hi girls

I don't think the song needs to be torn apart, in fact I think it can work precisely as is. Stretching the vocals can work, just have to keep at it, till you get it right....let your natural talent be your guide!!!

I'm not here to rant..havoc....hmmmm... ....and yeah ....what do I know about music....

BP

Hi Bobbie,

Now that I know you are waiting on consistent advice from "insiders" before effecting a change, it will greatly minimize any more of my future moments of "devastation" . . . like when I tried to "slow" . . . stretch (slow down the delivery) . . . the chorus out without changing the tempo. . . merely by eliminating a few syllables like, "white trash."

Cheers,
Terry

(((singin" )))
Time won't let me. . .
by the Outsiders

[This message has been edited by Tall_Terry (edited 06-01-2005).]