Who's Online Now
10 members (bennash, Fdemetrio, Guy E. Trepanier, Sam Wilson, Irwin, VNORTH2, JAPOV, Everett Adams, 2 invisible), 872 guests, and 257 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Register Today!
Welcome to the Just Plain Folks forums! You are currently viewing our forums as a Guest which gives you limited access to most of our discussions and to other features.

By joining our free community you will have access to post and respond to topics, communicate privately with our users (PM), respond to polls, upload content, and access many other features. Registration is fast, simple, and absolutely free; so please join our community today!
ShoutChat
Comment Guidelines: Do post respectful and insightful comments. Don't flame, hate, spam.
What's Going On
No More Sorrow
by bennash - 07/15/24 06:19 PM
River
by bennash - 07/15/24 03:44 PM
AI LAWSUITS
by bennash - 07/15/24 09:52 AM
The Rant Arena
by JAPOV - 07/15/24 09:41 AM
His Hand Will Close My Eyes
by JAPOV - 07/14/24 10:01 PM
Name That Tune Challenge
by JAPOV - 07/14/24 09:20 PM
I have an Alternative Solution
by Fdemetrio - 07/14/24 08:09 PM
My exploration of AI created song stuff
by Bill Draper - 07/14/24 04:14 PM
Do you want a board for "Assisted" music?
by bennash - 07/14/24 10:47 AM
Bernie Madoff( Now It's done )
by bennash - 07/14/24 12:32 AM
Prophecy anyone?
by JAPOV - 07/13/24 11:26 PM
THree more cuts
by Everett Adams - 07/13/24 08:43 AM
Poof
by JAPOV - 07/13/24 08:23 AM
The Summer Of Love (Carroll Kiphen's lyric)
by Bill Draper - 07/13/24 02:05 AM
Where are my past entries at now?
by JAPOV - 07/12/24 11:29 PM
A Worthy Note
by Bill Draper - 07/12/24 03:32 PM
I Wish I Was an Ant
by Fdemetrio - 07/12/24 07:43 AM
Lou Evans with WORLD5 on the Bev Moore Show.
by World5 Music - 07/11/24 01:25 PM
The Slower You Get
by bennash - 07/11/24 09:45 AM
Problem I foresee with ai
by bennash - 07/11/24 08:47 AM
OnLine...
by JAPOV - 07/10/24 11:47 PM
Im runnin out of songs...
by Fdemetrio - 07/10/24 03:39 PM
I'm Your Star (AI)
by Rob B. - 07/10/24 12:04 PM
Urban Poetry
by Fdemetrio - 07/10/24 10:47 AM
So who has played with Udio?
by Gregory Watton - 07/09/24 07:15 PM
Tom Waits.. What's he building
by bennash - 07/09/24 06:06 PM
Raining In My Heart (AI)
by Rob B. - 07/09/24 05:39 PM
Urban Poetry
by Fdemetrio - 07/08/24 06:25 PM
YELLIN AT CLOUDS
by Bill Draper - 07/08/24 03:56 PM
Stuck Here At The Light
by Bill Draper - 07/08/24 03:40 PM
Top Posters
Calvin 19,857
Travis david 12,264
Kevin Emmrich 10,943
Jean Bullock 10,330
Kaley Willow 10,240
Two Singers 9,649
Joice Marie 9,186
Mackie H. 9,003
glynda 8,683
Mike Dunbar 8,574
Tricia Baker 8,318
couchgrouch 8,170
Colin Ward 7,911
Corey 7,357
Vicarn 6,916
Mark Kaufman 6,589
ben willis 6,114
Fdemetrio 5,894
Lynn Orloff 5,788
Louis 5,725
Linda Sings 5,608
KimberlyinNC 5,210
Neil Cotton 4,909
Derek Hines 4,893
DonnaMarilyn 4,670
Sunset Poet 4,559
Blake Hill 4,528
Bob Cushing 4,389
Roy Cooper 4,271
JAPOV 4,217
Bill Osofsky 4,199
Tom Shea 4,195
Cindy Miller 4,178
TamsNumber4 4,171
MFB III 4,143
nightengale 4,096
E Swartz 3,985
beechnut79 3,878
Caroline 3,865
Kolstad 3,845
Dan Sullivan 3,710
Dottie 3,427
joewatt 3,411
Bill Cooper 3,279
John Hoffman 3,199
Skip Johnson 3,027
Pam Hurley 3,007
Terry G 3,005
Nigel Quin 2,891
PopTodd 2,890
Harriet Ames 2,870
MidniteBob 2,761
Nelson 2,616
Tom Tracy 2,558
Jerry Jakala 2,524
Al Alvarez 2,499
Eric Thome 2,448
Hummingbird 2,401
Stan Loh 2,263
Sam Wilson 2,247
Wendy D 2,235
Judy Hollier 2,232
Erica Ellis 2,202
maccharles 2,134
TrumanCoyote 2,096
Marty Helly 2,041
DukeWill 2,002
floyd jane 1,985
Clint Anglin 1,904
cindyrella 1,888
David Wright 1,866
Clairejeanne 1,851
Cindy LaRosa 1,824
Ronald Boyt 1,675
Iggy 1,653
Noel Downs 1,633
Rick Heenan 1,608
Cal 1,574
GocartMoz 1,559
Jack Swain 1,554
Pete Larsen 1,537
Ann Tygart 1,529
Tom Breshers 1,487
RogerS 1,481
Tom Franz 1,473
Chuck Crowe 1,441
Ralph Blight 1,440
Rick Norton 1,429
Kenneth Cade 1,429
Deej56 1,417
bholt 1,411
Letha Allen 1,409
in2piano 1,404
Stan Simons 1,402
mattbanx 1,384
Jen Shaner 1,373
VNORTH2 1,362
Charlie Wong 1,347
KevinP 1,324
Vondelle 1,316
Tom W. 1,313
Jan Petter 1,301
scottandrew 1,294
lane1777 1,280
Gerry 1,280
DakLander 1,265
IronKnee 1,262
PeteG 1,242
Ian Ferrin 1,235
Glen King 1,214
IdeaGuy 1,209
AaronAuthier 1,177
summeoyo 1,174
Diane Ewing 1,162
ckiphen 1,146
bennash 1,086
joro 1,082
BobbyJoe 1,075
S.DEE 1,040
yann 1,037
David Gill 1,035
9ne 1,035
Tony A 1,016
argo 986
peaden 984
90 dB 964
Wolvman 960
Jak Kelly 912
krtinberg 890
Drifter 886
Petra 883
RJC 845
Brenda152 840
Nadia 829
ant 798
Juan 797
TKO 784
Dayson 781
frahmes 781
teletwang 762
Andy K 750
Andy Kemp 749
tbryson 737
Jackie444 731
Irwin 727
3daveyO3 704
Dixie 701
Joy Boy 695
Pat Hardy 692
Knute 686
Lee Arten 678
Moosesong 668
Katziis 652
R.T.MOORE 638
quality 637
CG King 622
douglas 621
R&M 614
Mel 614
NaomiSue 601
Shandy 590
Ria 587
TAMERA64 583
Rob B. 580
qbaum 570
nitepiano 566
pRISCILLA 556
Tink2 553
musica 539
deanbell 528
RobertK 527
BonzaiWag 523
Roderic 522
BB Wilbur 513
goodfolks 499
Zeek 487
Stu 486
Steve P. 481
KathyW 462
allenb 459
MaxG 458
Philjo 454
fanito 448
trush48 448
dmk 442
Rob L 439
arealrush 437
DGR 436
avweek 435
Stephen D 433
Emmy 431
marquez 422
kit 419
Softkrome 417
kyrksongs 415
RRon 408
Laura G. 407
VNORTH 407
Debra 407
eb 406
cuebald 399
EdPerrone 399
Dannyk1 395
Hobart 395
Davyboy49 393
Smile 389
GJShades 387
Alek 386
Ezt 384
tone 380
Marla 380
Ann_F 379
iggyiggy 378
coalminer 377
java 374
ddreuter 371
spidey 371
sweetsong 370
danny 367
Jim Ryan 360
papaG 353
Z - man 350
JamesDF5 348
John K 348
Jaden 344
TheBaz 340
Steggy 339
leif 339
tonedeaf 336
rickwork 334
Eddie Ray 332
Johnboy 328
Bob Lever 328
Helicon1 327
lucian 326
Muskie 321
kc 319
Z. Mulls 318
ptondreau 313
ONOFFON 312
Chris B. 310
trush 304
ed323 297
Ellen M 294
markus-ky 293
lizzorn 291
nicnac49 290
Char 286
ktunes 285
Top Likes Received
JAPOV 94
VNORTH2 57
bennash 46
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Rate Thread
Page 1 of 2 1 2
#1189528 08/28/23 03:44 PM
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
I found this song lyric (Life In A Dying Town) from Carroll Kiphen this afternoon in the Lyric Feedback Forum. I felt inspired so I wrote and recorded this little stripped-down demo. I’d love to hear your thoughts.

https://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=14646544

All the best – Robert

1 member likes this: Guy E. Trepanier
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
In the chorus sections I think the vocalist sounds a little like Lana Del Rey.

Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Top 100 Poster
Online Sleepy
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Just a thought...

Just a holler south of Memphis
There’s a one stoplight town
Where proud locals meet for breakfast
And gossip makes the rounds

They like their eggs sunny
Served with biscuits and ham
Just a little sugar in the coffee
And a slice of toast with jam

One old sign on the interstate
Easily missed unless you know
Where the free and brave raise families
Unashamed to call it home

This is life
Life in nowhere town
This is life in a nowhere town

Nothing changes 'round here
You only reap what you sow
Folks sit in front porch swings
And wave at friends they know

The diner closes at nine
Opens at the crack of dawn
They’ll do the same old things again
Drink iced tea and mow their lawns

Sundays are for gathering
The Bible guides their way
They sing then bow their heads
And pray for a brighter day

This is life...


The journey is definitely more important than the destination...
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
F
Top 50 Poster
Online Content
Top 50 Poster
F
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
Musically, with the girl singer, it sounds like stuff you hear on pop radio, young girls singing love ballads. and this should probably be a heartbreak, love ballad.

This sounds like a young girl singing what probably should be a country song, and an adult POV.

i dont wanna get into with you, im honestly trying to be helpful. What i noticed in your previous songs, they sound good, they are good melodies, but the prosody is off.

You have to consider that the music is a showcase for whats being said. In this there is a disconnect.

Prosody matters, keep pluggin away.

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 08/30/23 10:32 AM.
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Hey Tony,
the lines you came up with are great and it would be pretty easy to generate new vocals together with my existing tune based on your lines. The only issue I have is that you changed the subject and gave it a much more positive vibe. Carroll’s lyrics deal with the fact that communities and towns are disappearing because the young folks are moving away. There are many discussions here in Germany why this is happening and how it can be stopped. It’s sad, because many towns with a rich history don’t have a future. I tried to express this in the music that I composed. Now, with that positive twist you put on the lyrics, your song is about a town out in nowhere, near Memphis. I think your lyric would require music with a more positive vibe. But you really wrote some good lines and it should be relatively easy to compose new music for them. Thanks for sharing this.

Last edited by Rob B.; 08/30/23 11:23 AM.
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Hi Fdem,
imagine this young girl that you hear in a video clip singing about the town she lives in. A town which is slowly dying because her fellow young ones are moving to the cities. She's singing about life in the dying town she lives in. To you it sounds like today's pop because her voice sounds young. What do the younger generation sing? Oldies?
Is this pop or country? It's a stripped down demo with just one single instrument. It could be either or, or something completely different. An artist could take this in many directions. I didn't want to limit the potential by taking it in a specific direction to start with. I don't feel the discomfort you are feeling, but many people respond differently to music. Thanks for your feedback.

Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Top 100 Poster
Online Sleepy
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Lol... I actually agree with Dom.
Your melodies are always so "light hearted"...
That's why I changed the lyrics wink

Good luck with it, Rob


The journey is definitely more important than the destination...
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Originally Posted by JAPOV
Your melodies are always so "light hearted"...

Thank you Tony.
Many people told me that song I posted recently called "Don't Leave Me Alone" sounded very dark. I find it interesting that you find it light hearted. Like I wrote, many people hear and respond to music differently.

All the best - Robert

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
What i noticed in your previous songs, they sound good, they are good melodies, but the prosody is off.

You have to consider that the music is a showcase for whats being said. In this there is a disconnect.

Prosody matters, keep pluggin away.

HI Fdem,
ok, prosody matters to you and according to you, in all of my songs the prosody is off. One of the things that I find important is to write songs that artists want to sing. One of the songs I posted here recently (Let Me Run) I wrote specifically for a young female artist. I had several artists asking if they could have that song. You say the prosody is off. Well, maybe it is. Nevertheless, I found a good artist, musicians, a music producer, a video clip producer and the song got radio airplay and was performed live before an audience of several thousand people. So far, nobody involved noticed anything was off.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me.

Joined: May 2017
Posts: 2,185
Likes: 27
Top 200 Poster
Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 2,185
Likes: 27
Dom may be right about the prosody in this particular song. Of course, I don't think it's fair to judge the song on the basis of the AI technology that you are playing around with. But I think maybe EZ-Keys comes into it too when it comes to getting the feeling just right.

"Let Me Run" is really good. It feels different in its production. Did you produce it with friends playing the instruments?

Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,770
Likes: 24
Top 50 Poster
Offline
Top 50 Poster
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,770
Likes: 24
HI Rob,

Musically and lyrically this can be compared, on the surface, to Simon and Garfunkel's "My Little Town."

The main difference is that S & G are "looking back" and there is as much (angry, resentful) personal opinion as descriptive "snapshots" in their song, whereas the young woman is singing more "in the moment"--about what is happening NOW, as we speak, in her town, and it's mostly descriptive and does not reveal much (at least directly) about how she feels about her town.

And though Carroll's lyric as sung by the female vocalist does seem more objective about her town than the one in S & G's hit, it is no less moving to me, and the song, as a whole is very moving to me as well.

I think there is an "inkblot" effect when we listen to something that is basically descriptive imagery: we tend to "project" how the singer feels into the singer, based on how those images make us feel.

Musically, based on some comments, I was prepared to be listening to "happy" music and experiencing irony between the music and lyric, like we experience when we hear Gilbert O' Sullivan's "Alone Again (Naturally)." But the music to "Life In A Dying Town" is about as happy as that in "My Little Town" --that being: not happy at all, at least for me.

There's a beautifully sad feeling that overwhelms me, especially in the chorus and the chord changes therein. The musical writing, here, does more to affect my perception of "how she feels" about the dying town than anything in the lyric, a lyric that sticks to "showing" and not "telling" consistently throughout. Bravo on that count!

So for me, in other words, the music helps clarify a very "showing" lyric by "telling" me it's okay to feel sad that this is "a dying town."

And the saddest beauty in the song is how the girl distances herself from it, though she has clearly lived in it, if not STILL living in it. She refers to the folks in this town as "they" and has divorced herself, in her mind, from the town, while trying to talk about it objectively. This is a very layered write.

Great lyric, great music. Perfect match between them, composition-ally, for me.

Mike

Last edited by Michael Zaneski; 08/30/23 03:25 PM.

Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
1 member likes this: Rob B.
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Hi Gavin,
well, Life In A Dying Town has a 6/8 timing signature, which isn't all that common in pop music.

By the way, Fdem said the prosody was off in all the songs I previously posted here, not just this one. You think Let Me Run is good, someone else says the prosody is off. It shows that people "hear" songs differently. Thanks.

"Let Me Run" started as a stripped down demo. I wrote the words and the music and recorded everything myself. At that time I was criticized pretty much for the subpar lyrics. Apparently the lines were too short. It's amazing what people sometimes criticize. That all changed with the semi-professional production, the female vocals and especially the video clip. A musician found the demo in a forum and noticed the potential. We worked together on the song remotely. It's the same song, just polished. In the version used in the video all I did was record the vocals together with Elisa in my studio. She was very professional.

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Hey Mike,
you just made my day. It looks like we are floating on the same air waves. For a moment I was feeling a bit uncertain about this song and just listened to it a couple of times trying to find the issues I wasn't hearing. I take feedback seriously. Now I feel better. People do "hear" songs differently. Thanks!

Take care - Robert

Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 1,362
Likes: 57
V
Top 200 Poster
Online Content
Top 200 Poster
V
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 1,362
Likes: 57
Rob B.

Firstly, to put this together in a few hours is no small feat..hats off to you for that alone

Because it is in 6/8 time there will tend to be a bouncy feel to it because of the rise and fall of 6/8 time..... ergo. perhaps, a lighthearted melody noted by JAPOV and possibly the reason for Dom's comment. And you are so correct, we all hear the music differently.

I have a simple belief..if 99% of the population hates my music 80 million people love it, and that is just fine for me LOLOLOL

You do nice work Rob...keep posting

Steve


Creators of music have a responsibility to their craft. When they have finished using all the notes and words, they must pass them down to the next generation with a simple request. “Use these to create new music.”...Steven McDonald
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Top 500 Poster
Online Content
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
So that's AI again Rob ?
Sounds real good man

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Hi Steve,
thanks for taking the time to listen to this song. Yes, I did record this one in just a few hours. EZ Keys makes that possible. I'm with you regarding those numbers you mentioned. Thank you!

All the best - Robert

Last edited by Rob B.; 08/30/23 05:11 PM.
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Hi Bennash,
yes, those are AI generated vocals. The tool is called Synthesizer V and the voice is Solaria. To save time I didn't sing this one myself. I went straight to the tool, entered my midi data and Carroll's lyrics. Bingo. Once you know how it works, it's pretty easy and efficient. Thanks for the feedback.

Joined: May 2017
Posts: 2,185
Likes: 27
Top 200 Poster
Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 2,185
Likes: 27
Originally Posted by Rob B.
Hi Gavin,
well, Life In A Dying Town has a 6/8 timing signature, which isn't all that common in pop music.

By the way, Fdem said the prosody was off in all the songs I previously posted here, not just this one. You think Let Me Run is good, someone else says the prosody is off. It shows that people "hear" songs differently. Thanks.

"Let Me Run" started as a stripped down demo. I wrote the words and the music and recorded everything myself. At that time I was criticized pretty much for the subpar lyrics. Apparently the lines were too short. It's amazing what people sometimes criticize. That all changed with the semi-professional production, the female vocals and especially the video clip. A musician found the demo in a forum and noticed the potential. We worked together on the song remotely. It's the same song, just polished. In the version used in the video all I did was record the vocals together with Elisa in my studio. She was very professional.

There's no such thing as a line that's too short. Too short for what? LOL

Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Top 500 Poster
Online Content
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Wow I'm pretty impressed what AI can do .
I've been hearing about it for 4 weeks . but never a example what the machine can do.
I heard the demo , That song is horrible on that site

Last edited by bennash; 08/31/23 09:44 PM.
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
I'm with you, Gavin. But they kept saying 2-, 3-, and 4-word lines are too short for a good song. I didn't get it then and I surely don't get it now.

Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Top 500 Poster
Online Content
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Majors are all over the place on short lines or a bit longer
It don't matter as long as it sings IMHO

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Hi Bennash,
I posted this before. Here's a video that shows you in detail how the software works. This video contains all you really need to know about the program. I didn't need a manual, just this video.


Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Top 500 Poster
Online Content
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
ok let me educate myself
Thanks
Your song sounds 100% better then what that demo is doing what I hear on that site

I don't see the value , He sits at a machine a creates a robot song . Maybe I'm missing something
Looks like he let a robot fix a lyric also
I'd have look at this guy more carefully
It reminds me of a toy for no one to listen to but himself

Lyrically it does a decent job , Small town angles have been done many times
Thats the new one 2023


your hook is catchy, I've just heard streets roll up at 9 angle

Last edited by bennash; 08/30/23 09:46 PM.
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 2,185
Likes: 27
Top 200 Poster
Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 2,185
Likes: 27
Originally Posted by Rob B.
I'm with you, Gavin. But they kept saying 2-, 3-, and 4-word lines are too short for a good song. I didn't get it then and I surely don't get it now.
Sounds like the kind of thing that some (not all) of the folks who write lyrics only come up with. It's all about structure and how it looks on the page, the same kind of thinking that leads to an obsession with counting syllables. If you have a tune in your head, none of this matters smile

Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
F
Top 50 Poster
Online Content
Top 50 Poster
F
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
Originally Posted by Rob B.
Hi Fdem,
imagine this young girl that you hear in a video clip singing about the town she lives in. A town which is slowly dying because her fellow young ones are moving to the cities. She's singing about life in the dying town she lives in. To you it sounds like today's pop because her voice sounds young. What do the younger generation sing? Oldies?
Is this pop or country? It's a stripped down demo with just one single instrument. It could be either or, or something completely different. An artist could take this in many directions. I didn't want to limit the potential by taking it in a specific direction to start with. I don't feel the discomfort you are feeling, but many people respond differently to music. Thanks for your feedback.

im glad this didnt cause a blow up. not its not just her voice, the piano sound your using is contemporary, and the form and feel. i was listening to miley cyrus flowers the other day, some of those emotional love ballads you hear, it sounds like that genre completely, with or without the vocal, but the vocal certainly makes it a kids song, that may be an issue with the ai vocalist until they come up with variety.

i dont think young kids think about dying towns, certainly not a target audience of miley cyrus and taylor swift fans.

you can tell an older guy wrote the lyrics. you seem to be more in line with whats going on in radio today, and thats a good thing.

i dont hear paul simon in this at all, but opinions are like...whats that again?

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 08/30/23 08:49 PM.
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
F
Top 50 Poster
Online Content
Top 50 Poster
F
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
Originally Posted by Rob B.
Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
What i noticed in your previous songs, they sound good, they are good melodies, but the prosody is off.

You have to consider that the music is a showcase for whats being said. In this there is a disconnect.

Prosody matters, keep pluggin away.

HI Fdem,
ok, prosody matters to you and according to you, in all of my songs the prosody is off. One of the things that I find important is to write songs that artists want to sing. One of the songs I posted here recently (Let Me Run) I wrote specifically for a young female artist. I had several artists asking if they could have that song. You say the prosody is off. Well, maybe it is. Nevertheless, I found a good artist, musicians, a music producer, a video clip producer and the song got radio airplay and was performed live before an audience of several thousand people. So far, nobody involved noticed anything was off.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me.

i havent heard all your songs only a few, yes i agree, about the singers pov being important. which it would be a hard sell writing a commercially geared song with a lyric about a dying town. the lyric lends itself more to country or americana or

btw Morristown, nj IS on the list of most fleed cities in the us, yet the bars and restruants thrive. people go to party not live.

its only my take , i think you write good melodies and your sound great

Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
F
Top 50 Poster
Online Content
Top 50 Poster
F
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
my hometown, by springsteen, hes a rocker yet he wrote this as a folk song, a reason for it. If it was angrier it could be a punk rock song, depends on thbe setting. this is about a dying town, but notice how its written, it doesnt say its a dying town,


Last edited by Fdemetrio; 08/30/23 09:04 PM.
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,770
Likes: 24
Top 50 Poster
Offline
Top 50 Poster
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,770
Likes: 24
Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
you can tell an older guy wrote the lyrics

That's easy to say when you know an older guy wrote it? What reasoning leads you to this?

For me, the lyric feels organic (enough) to a woman's POV in that it's a bittersweet portrait being rendered, and it's quite measured, things I associate more with women and femininity. IOW, there's enough there, in the lyric, for me to suspend my disbelief and feel this is the genuine expression of a young woman describing a town in which she used to live.

Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
i dont hear paul simon in this at alls

The lyrical themes overlap a little in "My Little Town" and "Life In A Dying Town" ("nothing but the dead of night back in my little town" and "This is life Life in a dying town" for example).

Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
i dont think young kids think about dying towns

The only people who "dream" about leaving a small town are those stuck in one, and the only people who are stuck in one are those too young to move away, or too poor to afford to move. Young kids? No. Kids not quite old enough to move away? 15-17 yr olds? Yes. A dying small town? Even more so.

And I think those of a similar age can empathize, even if their situation is different. You don't need to be from a small dying town to empathize with someone who is/was.

Last edited by Michael Zaneski; 08/30/23 11:13 PM.

Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Top 500 Poster
Online Content
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Very smart Mike
So my thoughts if Rob has a fan base
Have people heard enough small town angles
Who cares what songwriters think , Its your fan base Rob
That's my point

Last edited by bennash; 08/31/23 09:46 PM.
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Hey guys,
did anybody notice that all the “small town” songs that were referenced here were about guns: Aldean, Springsteen, S & G.
The one I did with Carroll’s lyrics isn’t. Just wondering if that might be the reason some of you don’t like it.

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
its not just her voice, the piano sound your using is contemporary, and the form and feel. i was listening to miley cyrus flowers the other day, some of those emotional love ballads you hear, it sounds like that genre completely, with or without the vocal, but the vocal certainly makes it a kids song, that may be an issue with the ai vocalist until they come up with variety.

the lyric lends itself more to country or americana

Hi Fdem,
thanks for your positive comments about my songwriting. I have to admit that I've never heard of Morristown.

I'm sorry, but I can't leave those quotes you made uncommented. You say the vocal makes it a "kids song"? Is that supposed to be negative critique? I guess I'm doing something right because exactly that was my intention. I explained in a previous post in this thread what my idea/vision was when I wrote and recorded this song. The market segment from age 12-25 is where the money is. Don't tell me you want me to change her voice and make her sound like a grandma, which is easily possible with that AI software. I could have also made her sound like a much younger kid but my target voice was Cyrus, Swift or Lana Del Rey.

Ok, you think this lyric is country or americana and not pop, rock or something else. Are you one of those guys who looks at a lyric and can tell which genre it was written for? It’s funny, but so many people claim to have that skill. I personally think that’s total nonsense.

Who sang “I Swear” better? John Michael Montgomery in 1993 with his no. 1 country version or All-4-One with their no. 1 R&B version in 1994?
What about “Hooked On A Feeling? B.J. Thomas’ country version in 1968 or Blue Swede’s legendary rock version in 1974?

I’ve got a few more…
“Me And Bobby McGee”. Everybody knows that song. It was originally written and recorded by the Grammy Award winning country musician Roger Miller. We all probably know Janis Joplin’s rock version much better.
What about Lonestar’s no. 1 country song “I’m Already There” from 2001 which was covered by the pop band Westlife in 2007.
We all know Rascal Flatts no. 1 country song “What Hurts Most”. That one was successfully released as a Eurodance song in 2007 by Cascada.
And another one we all know … Dolly Parton’s country song “I Will Always Love You” from the 70s which was covered by Whitney Houston in 1992 as a pop song.

These are examples of hit songs that were successfully recorded in different genres. Same lyrics, same melodies. I personally think a good lyric can work in various different genres. The same goes with good, catchy melodies. All these examples (and there are many, many more) show how flexible and open-minded we, as songwriters, should be if we want to be successful. I'm a fan of stripped-down demos because they make it much easier for the artist/producer to take the song in directions you couldn't imagine when you wrote the song. In the past, even I've recorded the exact same song in completely different genres and both versions sound as if they were written specifically for those genres. Fdem, I respect your view here, but I guess we just totally disagree.

All the best - Robert

Last edited by Rob B.; 08/31/23 06:46 AM.
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Top 500 Poster
Online Content
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
I didn't say I didn't like it , Just a observations on small town angles
The new fresh approach on one

Last edited by bennash; 08/31/23 09:51 PM.
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
F
Top 50 Poster
Online Content
Top 50 Poster
F
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
Originally Posted by Michael Zaneski
Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
you can tell an older guy wrote the lyrics

That's easy to say when you know an older guy wrote it? What reasoning leads you to this?

For me, the lyric feels organic (enough) to a woman's POV in that it's a bittersweet portrait being rendered, and it's quite measured, things I associate more with women and femininity. IOW, there's enough there, in the lyric, for me to suspend my disbelief and feel this is the genuine expression of a young woman describing a town in which she used to live.


Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
i dont hear paul simon in this at alls

The lyrical themes overlap a little in "My Little Town" and "Life In A Dying Town" ("nothing but the dead of night back in my little town" and "This is life Life in a dying town" for example).



Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
i dont think young kids think about dying towns

The only people who "dream" about leaving a small town are those stuck in one, and the only people who are stuck in one are those too young to move away, or too poor to afford to move. Young kids? No. Kids not quite old enough to move away? 15-17 yr olds? Yes. A dying small town? Even more so.

And I think those of a similar age can empathize, even if their situation is different. You don't need to be from a small dying town to empathize with someone who is/was.

I suppose i do know the person who wrote it is older, and that kind of stacks the deck. But im not trying to stack the deck negatively, im trying to help this writer, if i can. if i cant, then i cant, and i probably wont, but... i see potential, but what i think he's doing is picking lyrics that are easy to write a melody to. And i gave Carrol credit for having that skill, of writing singable lyrics.

but on top of structure, and form, is content. I dont feel any empathy in this song at all, other than the emotional melody and music. But i do think that a young girl, as you see it, would not be talking about
"They like their eggs over easy
Served with biscuits and ham
Most folks round here end breakfast with
A slice of toast with jam

Kids eat pop tarts, and ramen noodles. And the reason i say Kids, is cause the music is top 40, pop sounding, thats the audience. Now, Carrol didnt know this music would be written to it,. he just wrote whatever came to him. Fair enough, but in joining the two pieces, there should be an understanding that they are supposed to go together.

Can we find examples of the opposite, of course.

Again i think the music came after, and the music is top 40 ish, the lyric is not, if not for the simple fact that 99% of top 40 songs are love/relationship/breakup songs.

Not songs about biscuits and ham.

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 08/31/23 10:26 AM.
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
F
Top 50 Poster
Online Content
Top 50 Poster
F
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
Originally Posted by Rob B.
Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
its not just her voice, the piano sound your using is contemporary, and the form and feel. i was listening to miley cyrus flowers the other day, some of those emotional love ballads you hear, it sounds like that genre completely, with or without the vocal, but the vocal certainly makes it a kids song, that may be an issue with the ai vocalist until they come up with variety.

the lyric lends itself more to country or americana

Hi Fdem,
thanks for your positive comments about my songwriting. I have to admit that I've never heard of Morristown.

I'm sorry, but I can't leave those quotes you made uncommented. You say the vocal makes it a "kids song"? Is that supposed to be negative critique? I guess I'm doing something right because exactly that was my intention. I explained in a previous post in this thread what my idea/vision was when I wrote and recorded this song. The market segment from age 12-25 is where the money is. Don't tell me you want me to change her voice and make her sound like a grandma, which is easily possible with that AI software. I could have also made her sound like a much younger kid but my target voice was Cyrus, Swift or Lana Del Rey.

Ok, you think this lyric is country or americana and not pop, rock or something else. Are you one of those guys who looks at a lyric and can tell which genre it was written for? It’s funny, but so many people claim to have that skill. I personally think that’s total nonsense.

Who sang “I Swear” better? John Michael Montgomery in 1993 with his no. 1 country version or All-4-One with their no. 1 R&B version in 1994?
What about “Hooked On A Feeling? B.J. Thomas’ country version in 1968 or Blue Swede’s legendary rock version in 1974?

I’ve got a few more…
“Me And Bobby McGee”. Everybody knows that song. It was originally written and recorded by the Grammy Award winning country musician Roger Miller. We all probably know Janis Joplin’s rock version much better.
What about Lonestar’s no. 1 country song “I’m Already There” from 2001 which was covered by the pop band Westlife in 2007.
We all know Rascal Flatts no. 1 country song “What Hurts Most”. That one was successfully released as a Eurodance song in 2007 by Cascada.
And another one we all know … Dolly Parton’s country song “I Will Always Love You” from the 70s which was covered by Whitney Houston in 1992 as a pop song.

These are examples of hit songs that were successfully recorded in different genres. Same lyrics, same melodies. I personally think a good lyric can work in various different genres. The same goes with good, catchy melodies. All these examples (and there are many, many more) show how flexible and open-minded we, as songwriters, should be if we want to be successful. I'm a fan of stripped-down demos because they make it much easier for the artist/producer to take the song in directions you couldn't imagine when you wrote the song. In the past, even I've recorded the exact same song in completely different genres and both versions sound as if they were written specifically for those genres. Fdem, I respect your view here, but I guess we just totally disagree.

All the best - Robert
Originally Posted by Rob B.
Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
its not just her voice, the piano sound your using is contemporary, and the form and feel. i was listening to miley cyrus flowers the other day, some of those emotional love ballads you hear, it sounds like that genre completely, with or without the vocal, but the vocal certainly makes it a kids song, that may be an issue with the ai vocalist until they come up with variety.

the lyric lends itself more to country or americana

Hi Fdem,
thanks for your positive comments about my songwriting. I have to admit that I've never heard of Morristown.

I'm sorry, but I can't leave those quotes you made uncommented. You say the vocal makes it a "kids song"? Is that supposed to be negative critique? I guess I'm doing something right because exactly that was my intention. I explained in a previous post in this thread what my idea/vision was when I wrote and recorded this song. The market segment from age 12-25 is where the money is. Don't tell me you want me to change her voice and make her sound like a grandma, which is easily possible with that AI software. I could have also made her sound like a much younger kid but my target voice was Cyrus, Swift or Lana Del Rey.

Ok, you think this lyric is country or americana and not pop, rock or something else. Are you one of those guys who looks at a lyric and can tell which genre it was written for? It’s funny, but so many people claim to have that skill. I personally think that’s total nonsense.

Who sang “I Swear” better? John Michael Montgomery in 1993 with his no. 1 country version or All-4-One with their no. 1 R&B version in 1994?
What about “Hooked On A Feeling? B.J. Thomas’ country version in 1968 or Blue Swede’s legendary rock version in 1974?

I’ve got a few more…
“Me And Bobby McGee”. Everybody knows that song. It was originally written and recorded by the Grammy Award winning country musician Roger Miller. We all probably know Janis Joplin’s rock version much better.
What about Lonestar’s no. 1 country song “I’m Already There” from 2001 which was covered by the pop band Westlife in 2007.
We all know Rascal Flatts no. 1 country song “What Hurts Most”. That one was successfully released as a Eurodance song in 2007 by Cascada.
And another one we all know … Dolly Parton’s country song “I Will Always Love You” from the 70s which was covered by Whitney Houston in 1992 as a pop song.

These are examples of hit songs that were successfully recorded in different genres. Same lyrics, same melodies. I personally think a good lyric can work in various different genres. The same goes with good, catchy melodies. All these examples (and there are many, many more) show how flexible and open-minded we, as songwriters, should be if we want to be successful. I'm a fan of stripped-down demos because they make it much easier for the artist/producer to take the song in directions you couldn't imagine when you wrote the song. In the past, even I've recorded the exact same song in completely different genres and both versions sound as if they were written specifically for those genres. Fdem, I respect your view here, but I guess we just totally disagree.

All the best - Robert

We could list probably thousands of songs, that make no sense, do not seem like they fit, seem like they are poorly written and conceived, and find every exception to the rule there is.

But how does that help us? Lord know hows those people broke into the business, and how those songs became hits, and maybe its just cause they are fun and people like them. But how is that a target for you?

Do you not have to see the bullseye in order to hit it?

At the end of it all, most of our songs will end up right here on this site and go nowehre else. But, there is art, for the sake of art, doing things right, and writing the best song you can.

I wont go into your threads any more, it seems any statement other than "this is great" is unwelcome and causes friction.

Im not trying to go there.

Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
F
Top 50 Poster
Online Content
Top 50 Poster
F
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
Originally Posted by Rob B.
Hey guys,
did anybody notice that all the “small town” songs that were referenced here were about guns: Aldean, Springsteen, S & G.
The one I did with Carroll’s lyrics isn’t. Just wondering if that might be the reason some of you don’t like it.

I reference Aldeans song as a reference to Trump, hes funny he has claimed alot of writers endorse him but do not, he tells his fans to support Aldean, Trump has never lived in a small town, and does not hold those values.

And btw, Jason Aldeans lyrics are not great either. but they do have attitude, and of course hes a great performer, and already has an audience.

I mentioned Springsteens song, to show that you dont have to call it "life in a dying town" for it to be about a dying town.

Love, is probably the biggest theme in music, any genre. But few people write "i Love You; there are exceptions, and not many titles with I love you in it. Why" Cause I love you means nothing.

When your wife or girlfriend is waiting at home for you, you come home, she hugs and kisses you, says "how was your day" ""i was thinking about you all day" "I made you this or that"

THATS LOVE, not Saying I love you.

Hence why say life in a dying town, show me how its dying. and bring some emtoion into it

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 08/31/23 10:38 AM.
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
"I wont go into your threads any more, it seems any statement other than "this is great" is unwelcome and causes friction."

Fdem,
You're not causing friction. I'm listening closely to what you are saying and I respect your views. On some issues you don't agree with me and I don't agree with you. There is nothing wrong with that.
Btw, some of my songs didn't end up just here. They actually went somewhere. Not as far as I had hoped for, but further than here.

All the best - Robert

Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,770
Likes: 24
Top 50 Poster
Offline
Top 50 Poster
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,770
Likes: 24
Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
why say life in a dying town, show me how its dying

I thought the lyric to be a virtual laundry list of descriptive observations. Most aren't specific to "dying towns" per se, but neither are they in Simon's "My Little Town."

In "My Little Town," Simon pinpoints lack of "imagination" on the part of the townspeople as what made him leave, then "Everything's the same/in my little town." In "Life In A Dying Town" the singer mentions how the townspeople will do "the same old things again" --IOW pretty much a lack of imagination and endless repitition, as well.

What age group finds "the same old thing" most boring? My vote is for the younger crowd, who might have fresher ways of thinking, seeing, processing life.

I don't believe a song is a "debate," having to be structured in terms of thesis, antithesis, and then finally synthesis. A song should simply follow it's own internal logic, and for me "Life In A Dying Town" does that.

Last edited by Michael Zaneski; 08/31/23 01:05 PM.

Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Top 100 Poster
Online Sleepy
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Originally Posted by Rob B.
Hey guys,
did anybody notice that all the “small town” songs that were referenced here were about guns: Aldean, Springsteen, S & G.
The one I did with Carroll’s lyrics isn’t. Just wondering if that might be the reason some of you don’t like it.

Just another thought... wink

Just a holler south of Memphis
There’s a one stoplight town
Where proud locals meet for breakfast
Eat grits and count rounds

They like their eggs sunny
Served with biscuits and ham
The smell of gun oil and coffee
And a slice of toast with jam

One old sign on the interstate
Full of buckshot holes
Where the free and brave raise families
Unashamed to call it home

This is life
Life in Shooter town
This is life in a shooter town

Nothing changes 'round here
You only reap what you sow
Folks sit in front porch swings
And clean their guns so everyone knows

The diner closes at nine
Sweet Caroline counts the register
Unafraid to walk home alone
Keeps a .44 under the counter

Sundays are for gathering
The Bible guides their way
They sing then check their aim
And pray for a brighter day

This is life... love


The journey is definitely more important than the destination...
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,770
Likes: 24
Top 50 Poster
Offline
Top 50 Poster
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,770
Likes: 24
Tony, thanks for the hearty laugh. smile


Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Top 100 Poster
Online Sleepy
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
"Songwriter Site" Ya'll laugh


The journey is definitely more important than the destination...
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Tony,
where are the pop tarts and ramen noodles that Fdem suggested? Man, you're really a creative guy.

Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Top 100 Poster
Online Sleepy
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Only "big city" kids are raised on Pop-Tarts lol...

You know, the obvious "stupid question" here is...;
"Why is everyone leaving LA and NY?"

... Speaking of "dying towns"

Last edited by JAPOV; 08/31/23 02:44 PM.

The journey is definitely more important than the destination...
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 1,146
Likes: 18
C
Top 500 Poster
Offline
Top 500 Poster
C
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 1,146
Likes: 18
Life in a dying town is not just about the town dying. It is about a rural American way of life that is ceasing to be. People were happy and satisfied with a simpler life. This way of living no longer appeals to many of the younger generation who are more driven by materialistic things.


Ckiphen
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Top 100 Poster
Online Sleepy
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
'Bout damn time you showed up, CK wink


The journey is definitely more important than the destination...
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Top 100 Poster
Online Sleepy
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Hmmmm.... If you consider my "original thought", perhaps you'll see the "outdated contrast". Perhaps that contrast should be the focus...?

Last edited by JAPOV; 08/31/23 03:05 PM.

The journey is definitely more important than the destination...
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
Top 100 Poster
Online Sleepy
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,217
Likes: 93
On the greener other side
There's neon lights and dancing gowns
Instead of old folks in straw hats
In a one stoplight town

They like their eggs over easy
Served with biscuits and ham
I want Pop-Tarts for breakfast
And facebook to know who I am

This lonely stretch of interstate
Where life passes me by
Leads all the way to someplace
Where dreamers learn to fly

This is life
Life in Nowhere town
This is life in a nowhere town

Nothing changes 'round here
People reap what they sow
Men sit in front porch swings
Women sweep, cook, and sew

This town goes dark by nine
Tractors rattle at dawn
Every day's the same again
My mind wanders far beyond

Sundays everyone gathers
'Cause only gossips are saved
Young men and girls pray
Lord please take me away

This is life...

Last edited by JAPOV; 08/31/23 04:03 PM.

The journey is definitely more important than the destination...
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Top 500 Poster
Online Content
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,086
Likes: 46
Cuz its to crowded in LA San Fran , its unreal
I'd stick with dying town and write to it , small town hook has been done to death

Last edited by bennash; 09/01/23 10:24 AM.
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Rob B. Offline OP
Top 500 Poster
OP Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 580
Likes: 19
Ok, after all these discussions about if the female vocalist fits this song well or not I'd like to throw a new vocalist into the discussion. I replaced the Solaria lead vocals with vocals sung by Kevin. Luckily with AI this can be done with just a mouse click. What do you think? Does the song sound better when sung by a male vocalist?

https://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=14648383

Last edited by Rob B.; 09/01/23 08:49 AM.
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
F
Top 50 Poster
Online Content
Top 50 Poster
F
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
Originally Posted by Michael Zaneski
Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
why say life in a dying town, show me how its dying

I thought the lyric to be a virtual laundry list of descriptive observations. Most aren't specific to "dying towns" per se, but neither are they in Simon's "My Little Town."

In "My Little Town," Simon pinpoints lack of "imagination" on the part of the townspeople as what made him leave, then "Everything's the same/in my little town." In "Life In A Dying Town" the singer mentions how the townspeople will do "the same old things again" --IOW pretty much a lack of imagination and endless repitition, as well.

What age group finds "the same old thing" most boring? My vote is for the younger crowd, who might have fresher ways of thinking, seeing, processing life.

I don't believe a song is a "debate," having to be structured in terms of thesis, antithesis, and then finally synthesis. A song should simply follow it's own internal logic, and for me "Life In A Dying Town" does that.

But thats a huge NO, writing a song where the lyrics in it do not follow the title of the song. No. they are not specific to a dying town, more importantly, who understands it? Older people who know what a dying town is, or care. Not top 40 listeners which the music is.

If you're Paul Simon you can get away with alot more, because you already have an audience, an audience who is willing to endulge you. When you're writing for commercial reasons, and trying to get some notice, if thats the goal, then you dont have that luxury.

Thats the main issue, prosody. And lack of emotion.

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 09/01/23 10:19 AM.
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
F
Top 50 Poster
Online Content
Top 50 Poster
F
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 5,894
Likes: 33
Originally Posted by JAPOV
Only "big city" kids are raised on Pop-Tarts lol...

You know, the obvious "stupid question" here is...;
"Why is everyone leaving LA and NY?"

... Speaking of "dying towns"

And who is top 40 listener, big city people. Not country bumpkins, maybe its a country song, but the music would have to be different for that

Page 1 of 2 1 2

Link Copied to Clipboard
Support Just Plain Folks

We would like to keep the membership in Just Plain Folks FREE! Your donation helps support the many programs we offer including Road Trips and the Music Awards.


Newest Members
chriscastle, yasir252, cathennashira, Samwise, HappySousa
21,470 Registered Users
Forum Statistics
Forums117
Topics125,929
Posts1,163,907
Members21,470
Most Online37,523
Jan 25th, 2020
Just Plain Quotes
"The great thing about a dream come true, is that it is born with a great appetite. That appetite keeps it growing and evolving and it swallows up all those other dreams you have and spits them back out as reality as well." -Brian Austin Whitney
Today's Birthdays
Folk Goddess (66), Mark Wohlfahrt (39), TimothyPratt (55)
Popular Topics(Views)
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5